A very Punny Thread™

[Plague von Karma]

Post puns and subsequently get shot in the head for doing so here.

I'll regret this when I wake up.

 

[Mace]

Smog Off Topic

 

[Martin]

Luke Atmey

 

[phoopes]

Nervous about signing up for my company's 401(k). I don't think I can run that far.

 

[Bughouse]

What do you get if you throw a grenade in a French kitchen?
Linoleum blown apart

 

[snake]

I went to a beekeeper to buy a dozen bees.

They came back with a jar of bees for me to take.

I counted them and said, "Wait, there are 13 bees in here."

And the beekeeper replied, "Yes, there's a free-bie."

 

[mf]

 

[Akai]

 

[ShootingStarmie]

I just dropped my phone in the bath...

ohno

and now its syncing

 

[CoolMan6001]

I just dropped my phone in the bath...

ohno

and now its syncing

Bro that was a phony pun.

 

[WaterBomb]

Bro that was a phony pun.

It was quite app-ropriate

 

[deftinwolf]

A scarecrow was honored today for being out standing in its field. o.o

 

[Kiwi]

My Geography teacher caught me and my friend talking in her class about Brazilian Wildlife.
She told us 'You Toucan meet me at lunch'

 

[a loser]

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground Beef​

What do you call a cow with two legs?

Lean Beef​

What do you call a cow that just gave birth?

Decaffeinated​

 

[Ironmage]

A group of people are relaxing on a boat when one of them decides that they want to have a smoke. They can't find anything to light it though, so they throw one of their cigarettes overboard.

The boat then becomes a cigarette lighter.

 

[DrPumpkinz]

Have you heard about the wedding between the two skiers?

One of them got cold feet and it all went downhill from there.

 

[Ryota Mitarai]

How much does a pie cost in a Walmart? It costs 3 dollars and 14 cents.

 

[Martin]

What?

 

[Kiwi]

What?

How much does a pie cost in a Walmart? It costs 3 dollars and 14 cents. Pie is pi = 3.14 is what he meant

 

[Martin]

Ah, thank you

ive done so much algebra today that my brain is fried

 

[CoolMan6001]

Ah, thank you

ive done so much algebra today that my brain is fried

Algebruh moment.

 

[Crux]

Lopunny Kicks

 

[ThelordofbadRNG]

oh no