Hello and WELCOME to yet another edition of the
UNBIASED POWER RANKINGS
After popular demand, I have decided to create some for what is sure to be a terrible tournament. However, it can't possibly be worse than RoAPL. I'm also very happy that my posts are making losers like roudolf13 and the rest of his dogshit country upset. What better way to rile up some garbage players than bash them over and over again? Since this ranking is going up after Week 1 is posted, I will be ranking people based on the slots their managers have put them in at this point in time.
Sprout Tower Sprouts:
SM OU: c0mp
SM OU: Zepherox
SM OU: Jefozz
ORAS: baddummy
BW: Lavos
DPP: henry
ADV: Bedschibaer
BO3: Ary
I'm just gonna go ahead and guess that this is z0mog's team LOOOL my lord this man drafted all of cpg. c0mp used to be decent I guess...he did well in this week's Smogon Tour lol. baddummy's stock plummeted off the face of the Earth after the disaster that was SPL. Beds would be a much better pick if RBY was in this tour. Ary I guess has an outside chance of being competent. henry is a meme. There's also 2 randoms on here, one of whom was 15k??? Ok, maybe he's competent LOL idk. And of course, tying this band of losers together is one of the hottest players in the scene right now, Lavos Spawn.
Overall: the draft theme seems to have greatly hindered the skill on this roster. might be time for lavos to pull out some spooky shenanigans, or else this lineup will probably get eviscerated week after week.
Castelia Sewer [Redacted]:
SM OU: Askov
SM OU: Simia
SM OU: Twixtry
ORAS: Chill Shadow
BW: McMeghan
DPP: Stone_Cold
ADV: dice
BO3: yjh971203
God, redacted is the fucking stupidest meme. Hope this team crashes and burns...jk i'd always root for elodin lol. Simia's a non-Ojama french, which basically means theres a 99% chance he's bad. CS is decent enough at oras, especially for this tour so. Dave should do competely enough in the variance madhouse, although idk how he was 17k LOL WHY'S DAVE SO MUCH IN ALL THESE TOURS?? Some of it's not even about dave...clearly you retards didnt watch spl or else you'd know to only spend 3-5k on dumbass dpp. and dice is a very good player when he's on point. The star of the show is obviously Roro, but especially considering it's an unofficial tour, i'd be surprised if he didn't meme like half the weeks. yjh has some hype occasionally but im not too high on him.
Overall: decent enough team with some star power but also some idiots.
22$G Garcho*ps:
SM OU: ima
SM OU: imsosorrylol
SM OU: Rexus
ORAS OU: yoppie
BW OU: Finchinator
DPP OU: Sharow
ADV OU: The Kyle
Bo3: FMG
wow this team looks horrendous LOOL ima might be competent i guess, although he wasn't bought in spl which clearly signals people are a bit down on him. i've never been high on sorry and would say he's below average. FMG + Finch is a pretty solid core after fmg's masterclass in SPL. Finch will do tryhard things in his main tier and put up a good record. the only Kyle I know is Zamrock so this guy's a meme. PASSION IS ON THE BENCH UNBELIEVABLE!!! They paid 8k for dundies and didn't start him which is pretty suspect like...analytic's also on the bench fsr. isn't sharow an ubers main LOL why tf is an ubers main starting in anything that tier's a joke. yeah..this lineup could use some shuffling cuz i don't really get it.
Overall: This team would be better if they subbed some of the people off the bench in...but either way, it's trash.
Ludicrous Ludicolos:
SM OU: Charmflash
SM OU: Eo Ut Mortus
SM OU: 1 True Lycan
ORAS OU: Rodriblutar
BW OU: Thatsjustpeachy
DPP OU: hellpowna
ADV OU: UD
Bo3: We Three Kings
Wow. this is the best team so far LMAO WTF IT ACTUALLY LOOKS DECENT AND IT'S MANAGED BY 2 COMPLETE RANDOMS USUALLY THEY DRAFT THE SHITTY TEAMS WITH BAD MAINERS OML Charmflash is a threat after his SPL, so that looks like a good pick. Eo is another solid SM player, especially for this stupid tour. the baron's stock is down a bit after SPL, but he has a decent amount of upside and it being OUPL means the level of competition should be less stiff. rodri's solid enough for ORAS. If we're bein real, peachy is crust and a half LOOL but hey, oupl means the crustrule is slightly less relevant i guess...hellpowna's garbage but havin a below avg / mediocre dpper is w/e it's variance anyway. ud is fucking dogshit but at least he was 7k and not like 16k like roapl LOL moxie been on fire so that's good.
Overall: This is a pretty solid team (for OUPL standards) with a decent amount of upside.
BB Seakings:
SM OU: teal6
SM OU: GypsyKing
SM OU: Jascha
ORAS OU: DeeJ
BW OU: Caetano93
DPP OU: Tamahome
ADV OU: robjr
bo3: Yvettee
I don't even have to check to know this is LL's team. just look at the goons on this LMAO HELLO ok i have no idea how good like 80% of this lu is but considering they haven't made any waves in spl or snake or w/e, imma assume they're all bad. Tama's probably the best DPPer ever if you go off consistency and results, so you can't hate on that pick...although, i would much rather have 3k dpp with 20k bein filtered out to the other slots which are p ass. rob's prob decent enough at adv. i don't think teal plays sm ou so LOL and he's not gonna gaf about this tour but idk mayb he can pick up some wins lol.
Overall: if all the dumbass irrelevant tour goons pull out some wins, this team could make some noise. otherwise, it's headin to the bottom of the lake.
CrashinBoomBullies:
SM OU: SickManSama
SM OU: Mohamed67
SM OU: sicko
ORAS OU: Bluxio
BW OU: BLUNDER SANTANA
DPP OU: Jhonx~
ADV OU: CMx
bo3: KratosMana
Ah, yes. The classic "let's buy 2 superstar players + a bunch of autistic filler characters strategy". very nice. are we ghosting? is that the plan here LOOL HELLO this team's fucking terrible. blunder and anti will prob hav like a 90% win rate or some shit in this tour but like LOL not really high on any of these dudes, although i will be rooting for [VoD]Sama in his return to tours. why's my man somalia not starting though? unreal. this is a team that could really use some trusted slots like real fv or some shit
Overall: this team's atrocious obviously like LOL i don't even need to say that. but hey, they have 2 of the best 5 players in the tour, so that counts for something.
Six Island Sobbles:
SM OU: Insult
SM OU: KingKdot
SM OU: Hayburner
ORAS OU: Jytcampbell
BW OU: 69 problems
DPP OU: -Tsunami-
ADV OU: mael
BO3: xray
Ah, my team. The OU core leaves a lot to be desired, since I'm not really high on any of these dudes. If my memory serves me correctly, hayburner's stock was down a bit after snake. I don't really think Kdot's that good and insult was kind of a mixed bag to me in SPL. jyt might decent idk not rly high on him. Asuya helped win me an SPL, so there's that lol. He should do decently enough in this BW pool and is probably good at counterteaming. mael won ost so if he gets back to form, he can prob put in some work in a terrible ass adv pool. it's hard to hate on xray after SPL, but he did struggle a lot in SM in snake. Still a good buy though based on the form he was in earlier; if he can take some of his ORAS skill and to SM, he should be fantastic. I'm crust af LMAO I DON'T PLAY POKEMON but w/e it's the thinking gen and i have teams I should do decently enough like come on this tier's a meme.
Overall: this team's kind of ass but if the crust players come thru it might make some noise.
Driftveil City Demons:
SM OU: The Hallows
SM OU: p2
SM OU: Talah
ORAS OU: Santu
BW OU: Mix
DPP OU: -H.M.N.I.P
ADV OU: Teclis
BO3: BKC
As your eyes wander down this team's lineup, you really begin to wonder how in the living fuck they managed to end up with a lineup so bad. and then you see bkc in the bo3 slot LMAO no wonder these guys spent their entire fucking bankroll on him. I mean, he's arguably the best player in the tour, and if he tries, he has the potential to hard carry a lot of the slots. he's in bo3 though...and i wouldn't rank him THAT highly in SM or ORAS relative to his price tag so. blunder for example is the same price and is better than bkc in 2/3 of those tiers. regardless, if he puts in effort and carries bw / dpp / adv, it could pay off...those slots r horrendous though LMAO my god. i dont rly think the hallows is good. p2 chokes a lot and is pretty inconsistent. and talah is just awful LMAO my god did you watch spl. santu seems to be pretty inconsistent too so i don't really rate him highly.
Overall: this is the BKC show. good luck my friend.
As I expected...these teams are fucking awful. This'll be hard.
1. Ludicrous Ludicolos
I'm already stuck LOOOL what the fuck this is impossible
2. Castelia Sewer [redacted]
Wow, this hurts. this team's dogshit
3. Six Island Sobbles
4. 22$G Garch*ps
5. CrashinBoomBullies
6. BB Seakings
7. CPG
8. Driftveil City Demons
God, with every PR I do, it feels like the quality of Smogon is going down LOL jesus fuck. the last 4 teams are pretty much the same except one team has 2 super hard carries so I gave them the edge. If the seakings moved Tama to a different tier and just punted DPP, they'd be better off. The Ludicolos on paper seem pretty clearly to be the best team...I would call them "decent" (for an unofficial). Every other team is legitimately bad LOL my god oupl is awful call it pocl. It's better than RoAPL, though. There's that lol.