Walrus WALRUS, The Return Of. [Won by Ampharos]

[Aura Guardian]

I'm amazed that I got a 7.4 when an 8 is hard to get, and that I got so close to the podium.

 

[UncleSam]

Coming in fourth from the bottom, we have a song from a band who could have placed much higher, if you sent one of their better songs. I will admit this song is the one that's stuck in my head from this round but only for how annoying and repetitive the wubby M-M-M-M-M-M part is.

True genius is never appreciated in its' time

 

[Ampharos]

True genius is never appreciated in its' time

imagine how high you could have scored if you'd sent one of the good muse songs

 

[Yeti]

Category 2: Songs with a Unique Instrument

I figured this category would let people submit something they like/jam to from any genre or era, as long as it has some cool instrument going on. Unfortunately we did NOT get the recorder cover of My Heart Will Go On, so a perfect 10 was unachievable in this category.

Kicking it off in 12th place, we have:

Gorillaz - Double Bass
Instrument: Double Bass (although this appears to be just two bass guitars which is technically a catfail)
Subbed by Dead by Daylight
Score: 4

I, well, I don't rightly know if the 'double bass' should count as a non-standard instrument since the bass itself would not, but we can be generous. And we need to be considering the Gorillaz have far better songs lol. This sounds like elevator music. I mean props for picking a song that is essentially ONLY the instrument being spotlighted.

 

[Yeti]

In 11th, we have a song that many of you have likely heard before. Or at least part of it.

The Troggs - Wild Thing
Instrument: Ocarina
Subbed by Aura Guardian
Score: 5.5

I.. do not remember this song having an ocarina in it but I'll take the submitter's word for it lol. Ok so Wild Thing is a song I have always felt like just... doesn't touch the net. It could've been more melodic, it could've been more aggressive, it could've been more something. As it is, I don't really care for how they arranged it. Is it BAD, no, but I'm gonna have to give it a mediocre score compared to the songs I haven't heard before in this category that haven't been irritating me for years. Oh yeah ok there's the ocarina. Yeah I don't know if that's a good instrument lmao it sounds like a recorder.

 

[Yeti]

In tenth, with a steep drop from his Cat 1 placement, we have:

Porcupine Tree - Trains
Instrument: Banjo
Subbed by Gmax
Score: 5.9

Submitting the banjo as your spotlight instrument to me is brave. It's not bad but it's not a standout. It's certainly a song. And it does start picking up. The first half is lackluster.

 

[Yeti]

Taking 9th, the first of the 'my instrument is every one in the orchestra ' submissions.

Star Wars: Victory Celebration and Main Theme - arrangement by Samuel Kim, original theme by John Williams
Instrument: Orchestra
Subbed by UncleSam
Score: 6

The instrument here is "an orchestra" which I suppose is allowed but you couldn't have picked a rowdier song? I think this submitter was trying to nostalgia-fish but Star Wars has lost like all of its charm to me at this point lol 7-9 were that bad. Is this song BAD? No, it's good, it's fine. Do I WANT to be listening to it? Also no. Submit something that hasn't been sodomized by The Mouse.

 

[Yeti]

We have the first OST of this category in 8th!

Fire Emblem: Shadows of Valentia - Twilight of the Gods
Instrument: Trumpet
Subbed by Lechen
Score: 6.6

This is the first OST when sorted for this category. We'll see if it can impress more than the Cat 1 OSTs did. I think the problem with sending an OST is that it is divorced from the ingame events that gave the song poignancy/meaning to you when you played through it. So to me, if I'm looking for a romping synth beat to jam to, it lacks the playfulness of a pop song and the depth of the OST as part of a playing experience. I'm gonna put this one in the 6s somewhere because I think it is good but I don't love it, y'know?

 

[Yeti]

Now, the third of the users to place the same as they did in Cat 1. In 7th,

Lost Swamp (Combat) - Cadence of Hyrule (OST)
Instrument: Otometone
Subbed by theangryscientist
Score: 6.9

Another OST, this one featuring the otometone, which is a fun instrument. This seems like it should be in a chase scene or race or something? It lacks the gravitas of the other OST I've heard in this round but it's bopping around.

 

[Yeti]

Marking the line of 'songs I would say I might listen to again' we have 6th place.

Billy Joel - Piano Man
Instrument: Harmonica
Subbed by pulsar512b
Score: 7.2

I have watched the video for this song previously which means it was probably playing deep down a YouTube auto-play rabbit hole. It's a good song but it's not exciting to me because it is a little slow. Like I'd listen to it without skipping it when it shows up in a playlist but I wouldn't seek it out. Also can we discuss subbing a song called PIANO Man to an instrument category, but the instrument is the harmonica? lol

 

[Yeti]

In 5th place and moving down two from Cat 1:

Cursive - The Recluse
Instrument: Cello
Subbed by Da Letter El
Score: 7.3

The beat is better than the whisper-singing. Probably better than the normal-singing too but that is also better than the whisper-singing. I like it but I don't know if it captivates me. I think in the 7s is a fair score for this considering I'm going to be placing some of the songs in Cat 6 in the 8s, and those I know I jam to.

 

[Yeti]

The final of three songs right next to each other in score, we have 4th place.

Jimi Hendrix - Crosstown Traffic
Instrument: Kazoo
Subbed by CrreamyKitty
Score: 7.4

I don't really listen to Jimi Hendrix ever but this has stuff going on in it. The kazoo is front and center. It is probably not the type of song I usually gravitate towards but it's not boring, which is a song's greatest sin (outside of being country).

 

[Yeti]

Now we reach the podium: Ampharos once again appears in the top 3, joined this time by ImaginaryNeon and Lectrys.

Coming in third!

The Stupendium - A Little Theorizing
Instrument: Cuica
Subbed by ImaginaryNeon
Score: 7.8

I don't rightly know what a 'cuica' is but we have one in this song. The beat is honestly good, it's fun, the lyrics are cringe as they are with any of these made-for-YouTube-channel songs. I will suppress the cringe and give this a kinder rating. For the sake of the beat.

 

[Yeti]

In second place, we have the remaining orchestra submission of this category.

Slavonic Dance No. 1 in C Major, Op. 46, No. 1
Instrument: Orchestra
Subbed by Lectrys
Score: 7.9

This was submitted as "an orchestra" as the instrument, which, sure there are many non-standard instruments in a full orchestra lol. I am not certain what to expect from the title. Honestly I quite like this it moves. It's jumping around. It's not boring. It'll probably get as high of a score as any non-"I love this song" could.

 

[Yeti]

And in first place, for the second time this walrus, Ampharos is beating the allegations of mediocre dadrock.

Violent Femmes - Gone Daddy Gone
Instrument: Xylophone
Subbed by Ampharos
Score: 8

The final entrant in this category is 'xylophone!' I have, of course, heard this song before. I wasn't sure where I would place it. I feel like I have, some years, not loved this song, and then other times, I'm like, yeah, I'm vibing. I think since the category was the spotlighted instrument, and you can really hear the xylophone vibing, while still being a pop song, I will be favorable to it.

 

[Yeti]

Category 2: Y2K Songs

This category is for songs with that distinctive sound of the era. Songs from within 3 years of 2000 either way are accepted.

We unfortunately have a repeat offender in 12th place on this round...

Beck - The Golden Age
Subbed by Dead by Daylight
Score: 2

I like Beck and his other songs. This one is perilously slow. I get what the submitter was going for in the Y2K category with this but unfortunately it misses the mark of that upbeat 2000s-era rock that I actually like.

 

[Yeti]

In 11th place, though probably should've gotten a 0 lol, it's a song that is absolutely not from the correct years.

Owl City - Fireflies
Subbed by ImaginaryNeon
Score: 5

This is a catfail because Fireflies came out in 2009 and is absolutely NOT part of the Y2K sound lol. God dang kids who can't Google 'hit songs from 2001.' I will contend that Fireflies is a good song, so I will cap this at 5, which is less than it would receive if it was sent in Cat 1.

 

[Yeti]

In 10th place, we have yet another member of the OST brigade.

Final Fantasy VII OST - One-Winged Angel
Subbed by theangryscientist
Score: 6.2

An OST is a bold choice to submit in a category that's meant to be bands with the late 90s/early 2000s sound, but I respect the commitment to subbing OSTs and choosing one that fits. This is over 7 minutes and that is a long af time for a song to run. Even songs I genuinely love. Honestly it's not bad and it's got stuff going on in it. It kinda sounds like some of the Nightmare Before Christmas songs lmao but I am not a NBC bookbag girlie.

 

[Yeti]

And right after one OST comes another in 9th place:

Megaman X5 - X vs. Zero
Subbed by Lectrys
Score: 6.5

Another OST. The only thing I know about Megaman is that godawful mafia Sam hosted that was the start of my career of never having fun in his games. It's not bad it was moving. Better than the other OST but not quite the Y2K sound vibe.

 

[Yeti]

With a rather sharp fall from grace, our 8th place user returns to her old ways.

Pretty Girls Make Graves - Speakers Push the Air
Subbed by Ampharos
Score: 6.9

Has the right sound but it's not super melodic and so I don't wind up loving the arrangement. Like all the pieces are here but I feel like they have been done more enjoyably for me in other songs. It's not bad but probably not a repeat listen.

 

[Yeti]

In 7th, we have a band I thought was from the 60s or something and had to look up to make sure this was the right era lmao

Santana - Smooth
Subbed by CrreamyKitty
Score: 7

20 wasted seconds of time due to music video intro boo. The beat is def catchy and has the right sound but I feel like it's a little let down by the lyrics/vocals lol.

 

[Yeti]

So continues a very close race of scores. Unable to edge out its competition, we have 6th place:

Goo Goo Dolls - Iris
Subbed by UncleSam
Score: 7.1

I would probably score this song higher if I was in a funk and wanted to listen to a melancholy song and mentally regress to being a mopey teen for a bit lol. When I'm emotionally stable it doesn't quite hit right lmao

 

[Yeti]

Possibly the most consistent submitter of the Walrus, as all her scores have been within .2 of each other, we have 5th place:

FM Static - Definitely Maybe
Subbed by pulsar512b
Score: 7.2

This definitely hits the mark of the sound of the era but it almost sounds like AI generated a song that was supposed to sound like other early 2000s songs as opposed to being one of the quintessential songs that give the era its sound. If that makes sense.

 

[Yeti]

Narrowly missing out on the podium, we have 4th place.

The Knife - Heartbeats
Subbed by Lechen
Score: 7.3

Dang this is quintessential Y2K pop. Doesn't hit the rock side but it's out here doing its thing. It's a good song but it is a little slow.

 

[Yeti]

That means the podium for Category 3 is Aura Guardian, Da Letter El, and Gmax. Two familiar faces from Cat 1, joined by AG.

In third place with a band that is no stranger to millennials:

Fall Out Boy - Chicago is So Two Years Ago
Subbed by Aura Guardian
Score: 7.5

Ah now this submitter understood the assignment with a classic early 2000s band in Fall Out Boy and a beat that moves. I'm gonna give this mid 7s because it's not my favorite but boy does it sound better than the song above it in my listening order lol.