What's your quirk at work?

[Al_Alchemist]

I am so proud of myself for that rhyme.
I want to know what kind of petty, but unique or odd things you do at work. Not necessarily how you fuck with customers or etc., but more so what stupid or interesting things that you do to keep yourself and/or customers entertained.

--

For me, I am currently employed as a busser at a somewhat high class Chinese restaurant (award winning chef, table cloths, etc.).

One of my favorite things to do at work is to screw with traditional gender roles or mannerisms, in particular the rule that the guy pays for the girl.

Whenever I hand customers the bill after they're done eating, I always make sure to give it to the person who would be the most uncomfortable with being handed the check, but still within reason and not rude for me to do so (i.e. I don't give bills to kids). Because of society and etc., this tends to be the wife or the youngest female of the table, especially so for couples.

It is simply the funnest because it's amazing how quickly this can turn full stomach smiles into awkward, shocked faces and frowns. Couples tend to be my favorite of the bunch because, one of three things always happens.

1) Both customers will make an awkward face cringe/smile along with a short pause. The female customer then clumsily hands the check to the guy. If it's an asian couple the faces tend to be more exaggerated.

2) The guy will start to panic or get mad at the girl when she tries to pay. A short awkward fight usually happens.

One of my favorite instances of this started when the guy of the table hostilely exclaimed at the girl, "Why did he give you the check?!" to which she responded "What is that supposed to mean" and started scolding him for being sexist. She then payed the entire bill and he started to frown and I nearly accidentally laughed in his face.

3) They split the check appropriately and equally, or the guy lets the girl pay, and I am happy with this :).

 

[Phadunk]

When I worked retail(register), I occasionally handed the kid the receipt after their parents bought them all these fucking clothes and said something along the lines of, "GL paying them back". The parents always enjoyed it.


God I hated that job.

 

[Brammi]

We used to get membership cards in groups that snapped away from each other. So when the store was empty we used to split them by flicking them as hard as we could at each other so they'd break apart on impact.

 

[Acklow]

I work as a contractor for a roofing company. A part of our job is to meet with insurance adjusters and we point out damages on homeowners' roof to them so they can't deny that there is storm damage. Last week, I met with an adjuster. She was overweight, but fairly nice-like most overweight people. Anyways, we start talking and I set up the ladder to get onto the roof. She climbs up first cuz ladies first and all. I hear a crunch as the metal on the gutters bend. I didn't give it any thought as I climbed the ladder myself. We take our time on the roof and eventually come to an agreement. She starts to get on the ladder to get back down. Suddenly, without little notice, the gutters crumble under her weight. The ladder slides right under her onto the pavement. She flails around with her arms before tumbling down onto her back on top off the ladder. I stood in shock. This was the first this ever happened to me. I thought for sure she either died or lost consciousness. I yell, "Are you okay?" Her eyes remain closed for about three seconds until she finally opens them and rolls over to get up. The first thing she says is "I'm okay." But what followed next surprised me even more: she gets up, picks the ladder up, and puts it up against the house.
"I need to help you get down."
This woman was tough! Even now as I type this, I am surprised (and I still laugh) at the fact that she was willing to go back up on the roof a second time AND she approved it for full replacement. Adjusters are tough stuff.

 

[GCSChris]

This was the first this ever happened to me.

I sure hope so lol

 

[Dave]

This is what I do to people like you Al, ^_^

 

[Matthew]

As an expo in a fine dining restaurant I can't really do anything to mess with people as I just have to stand in the window where the food comes out and make sure it's what it is and where it should go. But I'm always dancing in the pass between the kitchen and FOH to keep the chiefs and FOH staff happy.

Though I try to keep an air of professionalism when I'm on the floor. There's no reason to fuck with the people who are giving you money.

EDIT:

@Al_Alchemist why is a backwait giving the check to a table?

 

[Ace Emerald]

This is what I do to people like you Al, ^_^

Seriously man why would you fuck with the people supplying your income?

 

[Al_Alchemist]

@Matthew What is a backwait, if it is a busser then well it's a chinese restaurant so some of the things we do are a bit different. My job description is to take drink orders, clean tables, and hand the customers the bill.

Well I figure it's pretty harmless enough, I'm only placing a check in front of the person. Like I said, I wouldn't do it if it's maliciously rude, like the person is obviously cripplingly shy or looks dirt poor. I don't think it should be insulting if I happen to place the check in front of the woman instead of the man, so it's somewhat like a very petty rebellion against sexism for me.

My description may have been a tad exaggerated, but I consider myself to be professional while on the job as I'm always polite, smiley, and etc. before and after handing them the bill. The placing of the check is the only remotely deviant thing I dare to do at work.

Also we take away the menus after you order like most restaurants. Besides that seems a bit drastic to do in response to where a busser places the check on the table.

 

[Shinryu]

Dumping work onto co-workers' seats in the office.

...yeah that's about it, kinda boring otherwise. Though if I had an office, I would dedicate at least an hour a day to closing the door and napping.

 

[Artikyuno]

Browsing Smogon when it's quiet at work :D

 

[Matthew]

@Al_Alchemist I guess you're not working in fine dining. Though I guess it's real hard to find fine dining Chinese. Backwait is a more glorified busser, they get tipped out more, but we carry more responsibility in some regards.

 

[Bummer]

When people mention my name, I may at times say 'Hello' instead of 'Yeah?', as they sometimes greet me in return only to forget what they wanted to tell me.