A Smog Of Ice and Fire: A Metagame of Thrones

By Layell. Art by Bummer.
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You may have heard of the popular book series A Song of Ice and Fire, as well as the hit TV show A Game of Thrones. But did you know the events that take place in them are actually based on the history of our very own website? It all began with our great leader chaos, the Princeton student that was promised, and his site was the Smog of Ice and Fire. As you may know there are seven kingdoms in Smogoros. Today we will examine the largest and probably the most important kingdom in the realm, the Metanorth, and all the locations that are important within it.

History of the Metanorth

When site leader chaos, the Princeton student that was promised, first landed in Smogoros he carved out a land that would house the exclusive place for battling Pokemon competitively. In time it became known as the Metanorth because it was so huge, cold, and unwelcoming to the newcomers who thought Charizard was good in ADV OU that it would murder their noobish instincts in a matter of days. In time, chaos gave lands and castles he built to other members allowing the kingdom to self-function.


Win Tier Fell: The great castle of discussing the OU metagame, the current OU council resides here to discuss what they want to ban next. One interesting fact is that the castle was built on top of an underground hot spring so that they would always have heated debates. It is however not advised to swim in them as you have a 30% chance of a Scald burn. They haven't banned that aspect yet because really it's kind of hilarious when it happens. Their phrase is 'suspect tests are coming' because there is always something somebody wants banned. Its banner is the Mightyena looking to climb higher in the usage stats.

The Inkly Islands: Home of those who play the Little Cup, they are really a small band of fighters, and aren't really part of the greater Metanorth. The raids they do on other meta houses where they ladder with Pokemon of their region are also really obnoxious. Their phrase is 'We do not Speed tie' because they are really trying to not make a metagame as boring as BW LC. Their banner is a Tentacool knocking off a Berry Juice and Eviolite.

Kokoshold: The home of the UU tier built by House Kokoloko. As the tier directly under OU they hold a great deal of power over the smaller houses. They are renowned for staying dedicated to how much better their tiers are than the OU ones. Their phrase is 'The Sun and Rain and Winter abilities are now banned to BL,' with their banner constantly updated with everything they keep banning to BL and/or releasing into the tier. We would show you what it looks like but it'd just be out-dated in a week.

Last RUth: The home of the Molk's and the RU tier, situated as one of the newly created metas it's the most northern castle; I guess there just isn't much prime real estate left. Their banner is a Pangoro breaking free of chains. We didn't let them have a phrase because we all realized it would involve a really bad RU pun.

The DreadNUght: The lowest tier, but not the least in any way. The DreadNUght is led by House Raseri. They are known for getting the flayed remains of all the other tiers, the least used or cared about. Any Pokemon that are still not viable in NU are flayed even more and given mock analysis pages. Their phrase is 'A flayed mon holds no use' and their banner is a grilled Alomomola.

The Dubreys: House of the Doubles co-led by House Joim and House Pocket. It is on the border of the Metanorth and is known for their strange culture of battling with two Pokemon each at the same time. Their castle is notable for being over a river with two large castles on each side and a bridge in the middle. The bridge used to be made out of nugget gold but some people took it in a huff and we don't talk about them anymore. Their banner is their castles and bridge, and their motto is 'No this is different from VGC.'

Beard Island: The secluded island of king chaos, there isn't really a castle here, just a bunch of log cabins. They don't really have a tier to discuss much here but he really just gathers other bearded families such as House Rodan and House Deschain to compare the length of their grizzle. They do play a ton of randbats here though.

The Policy Wall: The greatest feature of the Metanorth is The Policy Wall. Here is the most pure of all players from each respective metagame. Members of this elite group swear oaths to never enjoy playing metagames and to protect the realm from unbalanced tier lists. These council members also protect the kingdom from threats beyond their wall, such as the dastardly Wi-Fi-lings. Wild creatures with no sense of logic who post trade requests, harbor point systems, keep Google docs that are against the forum rules, and post requesting for RNG help, no legit-hacks, or no trade backs. No scholar has ever been able to translate their utterances into a civilized tongue. These Wi-Fi-lings are known to invade other forum kingdoms with no idea for proper posting etiquette and rules. More disturbing beyond The Policy Wall lies the a mysterious other force that resists all forms of tier lists, competitive logic, or regard for proper English in the chat. Instead they prefer to speak in a muttered Spanglish. In legends they are called the Brown Walkers, and they have been known to crash servers, annoy moderators, and make clan tournaments.


I hope you have enjoyed this brief tour of Smogoros and the Metanorth in general. Stay tuned next time for our tour of one of the other seven kingdoms of the site. If this article series is anything like the books and show, however, you'll probably be waiting a long time for the next installment!

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