Serious how do you get your fulfilment?

Just having fun doing something I like seems to be the trick. Sometimes I get a huge happiness bonus after doing something that gets a nice reaction out of my significant other.
 
Success through hard work. Whether it is in a video game or in real life, when I work towards something important to me it makes me quite happy. Also friends. Friends are a great thing.
 
learning about things I enjoy: Having ADD I tend to hyper concentrate; if there is something I am enjoying I will focus on it semi-unwillingly and keep focusing until I'm done with whatever activity. Because of this I have a tendency to read full pages of info only to click a hyper link at the end of the page and have another full page to read. I once spent whole day (literally a whole day like ten hours) reading about Superfluids just because I found an article about them that interested me. When I feel like I've finished something and learnt something amazing from it I'm always super happy. (This is also why I actually enjoy doing exams and tests, I feel like it's a way to show off to myself what I have learned. I don't like the studying in-between however) did that sound cheesy? it was probably rather cheesy.
 
learning about things I enjoy: Having ADD I tend to hyper concentrate; if there is something I am enjoying I will focus on it semi-unwillingly and keep focusing until I'm done with whatever activity. Because of this I have a tendency to read full pages of info only to click a hyper link at the end of the page and have another full page to read. I once spent whole day (literally a whole day like ten hours) reading about Superfluids just because I found an article about them that interested me. When I feel like I've finished something and learnt something amazing from it I'm always super happy. (This is also why I actually enjoy doing exams and tests, I feel like it's a way to show off to myself what I have learned. I don't like the studying in-between however) did that sound cheesy? it was probably rather cheesy.
That's exactly how I am. I can't study in the traditional way(it is almost agonizingly painful to try to force myself to sit and do simple worksheets), but I can spend hours and hours and hours reading about everything. I've also always been in love with exams and would challenge myself to get the highest score in class while finishing in as little time as possible(I don't have the attention span to check my work, so I got pretty good at getting it right on the first try). I've never officially figured out if I have ADD though. I assume that I do because I can't even do something as routine as driving without trying to read articles, text, speed, dance and sing to music all at the same time. It just hurts my brain to not keep it busy, idk.


Anyway, my fulfillment comes through finding ways to be more efficient. I was a grocery selector at Food Lion Distribution and we got paid based on how fast we went. In a short while I started picking up all the trick such as how to carry lots of cases at the same time, the fastest way to traverse the aisles, how to keep your pallet jack moving for a short time while you threw stuff on it, etc. I actually thought warehouse work was fun bc of all the efficiency tricks to learn.
When I became a personal trainer, it took mastering efficiency tricks to a whole new level. Non linear workout progressions, pairing antagonist muscle groups, utilizing workout complexes, optimizing the nervous system, placing importance on compound exercises, etc all blew my mind at how much of a difference it makes. One of my clients made it from doing assisted dips with a 100 lb counterweight to doing weighted dips with 60 lbs added onto a belt in 3 months with these tricks(he weighs 255)
Finally, I realized my truest passion for efficiency when I got my first manager job at the gym. At that point, not only are you responsible for you own efficiency, but for every staff member's at the gym and the gym in general as well. I strive to make as big of a difference as I can in how well everything runs and the really rich gym owner has given me a lot of insight on efficiency as well.




Also, Sweet Baby Ray's Barbeque Sauce. Oh gawd the fulfillment.
 
Anyway, my fulfillment comes through finding ways to be more efficient. I was a grocery selector at Food Lion Distribution and we got paid based on how fast we went. In a short while I started picking up all the trick such as how to carry lots of cases at the same time, the fastest way to traverse the aisles, how to keep your pallet jack moving for a short time while you threw stuff on it, etc. I actually thought warehouse work was fun bc of all the efficiency tricks to learn.
When I became a personal trainer, it took mastering efficiency tricks to a whole new level. Non linear workout progressions, pairing antagonist muscle groups, utilizing workout complexes, optimizing the nervous system, placing importance on compound exercises, etc all blew my mind at how much of a difference it makes. One of my clients made it from doing assisted dips with a 100 lb counterweight to doing weighted dips with 60 lbs added onto a belt in 3 months with these tricks(he weighs 255)
Finally, I realized my truest passion for efficiency when I got my first manager job at the gym. At that point, not only are you responsible for you own efficiency, but for every staff member's at the gym and the gym in general as well. I strive to make as big of a difference as I can in how well everything runs and the really rich gym owner has given me a lot of insight on efficiency as well.
What the hell dude you put beautifully what I was having a hard time even beginning to write down. I won't say I obsess over efficiency but I usually try my damnest hard to streamline whatever I do.

In one of my past jobs I had to file arguments in the prossecution to client complaints. I soon realized most of my answers had lines like "according to screen X, field Y, the attendant wrote blah", "protocol number X bears the message blah". In order to optimize my time, I had several of those often-repeated lines saved in a notepad, so most cases were simply an exercise of copy/paste and filling in the blanks and my productivity skyrocketed.

One time I spent over an hour at home solely rearranging, renaming, recoloring and redrafting my games spreadsheet. Didn't even notice the time pass because it was geniunely fun to do that.

I derive immense joy from figuring out improved ways to carry out things, from the quickest route in a Mario 64 or Banjo-Kazooie level (within my abilities) to how to do dress/undress faster to the optimal course of actions between waking up and going to work. This is useful for chores I hate doing such as ironing clothes and washing dishes. The less time I spend doing that shit, the better.

I can relate to what jumpluff says in that I feel good about learning more about something I'm interested in (or myself or human behavior in general) and being helpful to others. I'd go further and say that making a positive difference (lol this oxymoron is delicious) in someone else's life is one of the basic goals I have in life. Be it
offering good advice, making them laugh or just listening to their problems makes me happy because even if at the end of the day I fail at this life thing, I made the journey of someone I care slightly easier. I also, similarly to jumpjump, used to get burdened by their problems and get overly involved but over time I learned how not
to.

It feels particularly satisfying when I get what a verse in a song or a line in a book is supposed to convey.
I can relate to the general sentiment in this thread that getting better at a hobby is fulfilling, particularly those we invest a lot of resources into. By the same token, the inability to get better at them is very frustrating.

I'm normally uninterested in buying stuff for myself, even if it is a basic need like clothes and food. However, I love to spend money on books, getting home with a stack of them only to realize I have no space for more books (my backlog is ridiculous). But this is probably me being a try-hard, eh. Giving presents feels incredible though, few things are more rewarding than a wide-eyed, grinning face followed by "holy shit man, thank you!". :3~~~~~~
 
I find it through art. It's one of the few mediums I can easily express myself through and people are generally impressed by it, lending myself a sense of self-worth.
 
The most fulfilling moment I ever have had came to fruition after four years or hard work. It required me to get my grade school fatass self to try out for the soccer team (I'm American, we do end up calling it soccer just to differentiate ourselves from those girls in pads). It wasn't really fun for a long while, but I felt like I was in constant competition to become better than my peers. But the accomplishment to go from overweight to a captain of a soccer team gave me more fulfillment than scoring higher than everyone in my school on the ACT exams... Really, intelligence meant nothing to me because I can't effectively utilize it, so making use of what very little I had in the way of fitness was so rewarding when I finally was given a leadership spot.


Anymore, however, I can't say I ever feel like I've done something fulfilling. I am simply content, for no reason. It's a disposition that probably doesn't help (as I generally feel lazy due to my acceptance of my lot in life) but what can I do? As stated, my skillset doesn't really exist, I'm quite sharp but not elegant enough to make a good professional cut. Many things make me happy, but I prefer to feel content over fulfilled.
 

Stallion

Tree Young
is a Tiering Contributoris a Battle Simulator Moderator Alumnusis a Three-Time Past WCoP Champion
I take fulfillment in doing something at a high level with the least amount of work possible. I'll optimize my exam study to only include stuff that I'm certainly going to need for the exam as opposed to trying to learn everything and remembering nothing. It's worked well for me. I also take near warped amounts of fulfilment in proving people wrong. I remember a guy on another basketball team gave me some light hearted but honest ribbing about how ugly my shooting technique looked, and how he was surprised it ever went in. I proceeded to hit 8 three pointers that game (the most I've ever made) and took special satisfaction when I made them as he was guarding me. It probably stems from being told I can't achieve this or that for all my life, and I hate people trying to pigeonhole me.

Edit: on that note, training at the gym and djing are the two single activities that give me the most fulfillment. They challenge me in so many different ways, and the reward for both is awesome!
 
Something I find fulfilment in is teaching other people how to do things, I love teaching people whether its how to play cello, or what pokemon would improve their team the most.
 
this is actually a question i ask myself a lot, but a clear and conclusive answer eludes me

i think a lot of it has to do with trying new experiences. i’m usually not willing to experiencing new things due to an anxiety disorder among other things, but when i do get to have new experiences i think that contributes to a sense of fulfillment that i want in my life. granted, not all new experiences are good (most aren’t for me, honestly), but i think actively seeking out new things makes me happy to an extent; however, i find the process is usually more rewarding than the end. and, uh, i think having enjoyable conversations with people helps too, even and especially when i don’t necessarily agree with the other person’s stance on a given issue. i think being able to comprehend others’ perspectives on things that i think are important to me, since it allows me to further develop my thoughts. beyond that, i think having time to do my hobbies (mostly just reading literature and occasionally writing poetry, as i’ve pretty much quit playing pokemon seriously) is probably my easiest means of fulfillment. i like feeling that i’m constantly improving at something; however, i’m not (yet?) sure why that’s important to me, so i think the feeling of ‘fulfillment’ that i get out of it is sort of incomplete.

complete fulfillment is hard though, and i don’t think i’ve felt it since maybe early adolescence? i think what keeps me from feeling truly happy or ‘fulfilled’ is that i don’t know if there’s any valid basis or motive for why i do what i do. achievement is also naturally an important factor, but i think consciously attributing some importance to the things you do in your life is really important. that may seem so obvious to the point where it’s not even worth mentioning, but i think it’s of nonpareil importance to recognize that; like, with the aforementioned examples, i may like writing or stargazing alone when i’m at home, but i don’t see any necessity in it and so it only ephemerally makes me happy. by ‘necessity,’ i mean i don’t feel like there’s any valid basis behind it. i wonder a lot about whether there’s any point to what i do, and i think a lot of that gets in the way of fulfillment for me: i like a lot of the things that i do, but i don’t feel passionately about them. and i think that distance or disconnect from things gets in the way of me feeling happy. so i think a lot of my fulfillment or happiness comes from being passionate about things (this is difficult for me) and, if it’s like a sport or skill or something, constantly improving at it. i’m chronically unmotivated (though that’s not to imply that if i felt impelled to do new things i’d be very good at them), and so that gets in the way of things that would probably make me happy otherwise. nothing feels all that important to me, but i think i find fulfillment in things that give me respite from the pervading apathy about everything

i recognize that it’s probably unnecessary to need some sort of justification or basis for the reasons behind happiness, but i feel like i sort of need that in my life. i feel uncomfortable on a very visceral level if i don’t have that – it’s almost like guilt for feeling good, but not exactly. sorry for not articulating this very clearly and if this doesn’t make sense (and i doubt it does), but i’m going through a weird phase emotionally ?_?

tl;dr as fuck sorry lol
 

_Tonks_

Guest
I have a dog, ( Not the dog in my picture ), And I sadly get most of my happiness and what not from him. He's really fat so when he runs or woddles his fat jiggles and it's fun to watch. He's always around and is the perfect helper, lol. Sometimes when he sleeps he'll start rolling or moving around then wake up freaking up. I also really feel like I'm a person after getting done helping someone with any sort of thing. Whether it be a personal problem or building a team.
 
I get my fulfillment by staying busy in my life. Once in a great while, there will be a day where I'm completely free of responsibilities, free to do absolutely nothing if I so chose. But I'd feel incomplete if I did that; I need to be doing something whether it be working, studying, etc. Even though winter break is supposed to be a break from class for me, I chose to work almost every day of it last year. I plan on doing the same this year.
 

Cresselia~~

Junichi Masuda likes this!!
When I was a kid I was abused by my stepfather. My mom was in a co-dependant relationship at the time, so not only was she enabling, but most of my family had ostracized me because I wasn't willing to fall in line. Every time I threatened to expose him, they told me that if he went to jail that our family wouldn't have enough money to pay for cable or buy me video games. Had known then what I knew now, that 'things' are fleeting and you can be happy with almost no money, then maybe I could have done things differently. I didn't have regrets about my childhood until recently, but I definitely chose material happiness over doing what was right (maybe partly I felt I needed things just to cope with my situation). If I had done things differently, maybe I wouldn't have a sister who still ostracizes me well into adulthood, and who is becoming her father. Maybe I wouldn't have a little brother who is throwing away opportunities to stay closer to his father, a father that has poisoned him against my mother. Maybe I wouldn't have a mother who isn't allowed to date for fear that my dad will take it out on my brother, while said dad whores around himself. So if anyone thinks my not being materialistic makes me a "net intellectual", they can fuck right off.
Well, my mum used to be abusive, and dad didn't want me to expose things to the police neither, for whatever reason.
He kept saying that "what sounds good may not be actually good", something like that.
I still don't understand.

But now I'm older and basically turned myself way meaner AND tougher AND smarter than her, (plus she isn't as physical due to her age) she becomes afraid of me, and becomes very gentle towards me. She just isn't silly enough to call for a fight anymore. And she knows that she couldn't win verbally neither.
Now she's very gentle, and since I'm not abusive, we actually had some quality time together, and she wasn't as bad as I thought.
I've also established significant importance among other relatives, now I get to have a say in family decisions.

It feels like, firstly I have totally won, and secondly I fixed something.
Sometimes I just get some pride when she's gentle to me. It feels like, "great, you are now under me."

That is some great fulfillment.
 
Getting a A on a test, Cleaning, Finishing a project i have been working on for a while, For the most part just some simple things make my day
 
Well, my mum used to be abusive, and dad didn't want me to expose things to the police neither, for whatever reason.
He kept saying that "what sounds good may not be actually good", something like that.
I still don't understand.
Well, my thinking is that while you think things might get better, perhaps he thought they would get worse - less of an income, the person that he loves is gone and will thus contribute to mental instability of his own, having social security on your ass sucks {trust me on this one}, or maybe something else completely.

Oh, I guess I should contribute. Corny as hell, but I'm gonna default to "significant other" as well. Not so much sex {though I certainly have no problem with that}, or even "relationship" things, but just having my best friend out there while we can do whatever - go to the movies, a restaurant, chill at the Telus World of Science, whatever floats the boat that day - though it's normally just talking or playing on Pokemon Showdown. We're both fairly intelligent, I'd say, so it's just great that we can discuss philosophy, ethics, science, competitive Pokemon shenanigans, whatever. S'why I didn't understand why this was so funny:
chatlog said:
<~GreatSage> from my observation, it appears that most romantic partners occupy their discussions with repetitive declarations and other uninteresting content
<&Cathy> lol
<&Cathy> sounds dull
<~GreatSage> i do not believe i have ever observed romantic partners discuss any consequential matters (e.g. mathematics, science, or other topics of intellectual interest)
<~GreatSage> the "normal social protocol" of romance has always presented as exceptionally absurd to me
<&Cathy> which aspects are you referring to?
<~GreatSage> it is rather difficult to summarize them in phrases
<~GreatSage> it's not something i have investigated with any thoroughness
-when it makes so much sense to me.

This might be the answer, though:


But having a partner that you can really mentally stimulate yourself with and genuinely have a good time being around... I dunno, it fulfills both my emotional and mental needs, which is so awesome.

{inb4 it's so great that you care about your right hand so much}
 

Cresselia~~

Junichi Masuda likes this!!
Well, my thinking is that while you think things might get better, perhaps he thought they would get worse - less of an income, the person that he loves is gone and will thus contribute to mental instability of his own, having social security on your ass sucks {trust me on this one}, or maybe something else completely.
Maybe... I do notice that he's rather unstable recently. Thanks for the reminder and I'll keep an eye on him.

But my mum has never really had a job-- because Hong Kong doesn't recognize the certificates of her place.
Actually, India is like the one sole British Commonwealth country that would recognize her certificates.
She absolutely has no status whatsoever here.
Plus she really isn't clever, nothing when compared to my dad.
If she could be more clever, she would do without the certificates.

Family members often speak badly of her anyway.
 
Spending time with people helps me feel fulfilled. The only problem is that when we part ways, I feel empty again.
 
laughing

knowing that I will probably laugh the next day is literally the only thing keeping me going and the only thing i really "look forward to" on a day-to-day basis
Your life sounds tragic. To "keep you going" I suggest some Dave Chappelle and some inprov sketches. I wanna help you keep going.
 
Reading the Bible and going through here trying to find things to increase my post count really helps me relax. Just knowing that whatever I do probably sets off a chain of events, however minor, helps me get through each and every day.
 

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