Now that I've got everything seemingly fixed up, I set my DSi's date to 7/30/11, along with the time to 14:44. As I hit OK, I begin the timer.
I start up the game with plenty of time left on the first timer, then wait until it ends to soft reset. As the first one ends, I soft reset, and the second timer starts.
I press A to get to the Continue screen with a couple seconds left, then tap A as the second timer ends to enter the game.
Once in the game, I immediately open up my PokeGear and begin calling Elm, making note of which responses he gives me. Once I get about 10 or so written down, I enter the information into RNG Reporter... well, here are some of the results that popped out. While doing this, I never changed the timer or anything like that.
1. Elm: k, p, p, p, e, k, p, e, e, e.
Hit 050E02C2, 2011 07 30, 14:45:
06, Delay 695 (:D). Hit my delay, awesome! But how on earth am I a good 7 seconds off from my goal?
2. Elm: e, p, p, k, p, p, k, k, p, e.
Hit 040DFF48, 2011 07 30, 14:45:05, Delay
-195. A negative delay? What exactly does that mean...? All I know is that that's way off from what I'm going for.
3. Elm: k, k, e, k, p, k, k, k, p, k.
Hit 050E061A, 2011 07 30, 14:45:06, Delay 1551.

Way off, again.
4. Elm: k, k, p, e, e, p, k, k, p, k.
Hit 090DFF9F, 2011 07 30, 14:45:10, Delay -108. :(
Aaaand at this point I stopped. My delays seemed to be wildly fluctuating, and my seconds weren't looking so great either...