• Follow our Instagram!
  • Curious about what we're currently doing about bots? Check out the latest updates from staff in this thread.

Social LGBTQIA+

Something else: if possible, make sure your pepper spray is visible at all times. It does you no good if it's in your pocket or purse, as it can take too long to grab. I carry it in my hand when walking and make sure everyone can see it. As a result, even though I'm a trans woman, nobody bothers me.
 
Tressed said:
for self defense purposes. unless I missed something latest gay agenda update, in which case, scratch that (and someone please put me on the mailing list, i came out like a decade ago and no one sends me the emails)

look up local laws and stuff as well. in canada its actually illegal to carry anything for the purpose of being a weapon, regardless of intent for self defence, and while it's different everywhere around the world, escalating the situation is always kind of a gamble at the best of times. also no reason to give the cops another reason to give you further problems, cops famously love queer people and always give them the benefit of the doubt. look into options like personal safety alarms or safety whistles as go-to responses. bear, coyote, or dog spray are also worth checking out if you live in areas where those kinds of wild animals are potential issues.

anyways running away is based. put your safety first. no one wins in a knife fight anyways
Click to expand...

Canadian here. I've literally fought neo-Nazis. Generally I agree with this but carrying things as weapons and using items as weapons in self defense are two different things. No court is going to indict you for reasonably defending yourself. It's not illegal to wear solid rings (and only solid backed rings) or wear steel-toed boots either. If you are forced to escalate against untrained attackers then stomping in the knees is typically the best go-to anyways. The neck is a small target, there's only one, and it doesn't necessarily stop someone if you fuck up your strike placement a little. The joints that act as hinges on your limbs aren't supposed to experience stress in the opposite direction and that stress can dislocate the bones, and the knees have the added benefit of being weight-bearing and lower than their centre of gravity.

Also, please don't make your pepper spray visible if you can, that's seriously bad advice. Although it's more important to have a clear angle downwind than keeping it hidden, telegraphing that you have a weapon is: 1) escalatory; 2) encourages attackers to adapt to your weapon, if not just outright target your weapon hand; and 3) potentially inviting them to change their tactics to harassment at a distance. If someone is threatening or following you, you have to make your shot count before they cover themselves up or move upwind. Imo don't treat things that aren't guns like guns, showing off your spray isn't the same as telling someone you're licensed for concealed carry, no one is going to just have a kevlar vest on them, but nearly everyone wears a shirt in public.

Practice unlocking the cartridge in your bag if you have one. If you're unable to, then you don't really have a choice and are going to have to concede reaction time to your attacker.
 
Last edited:
boo836 said:
Canadian here. I've literally fought neo-Nazis. Generally I agree with this but carrying things as weapons and using items as weapons in self defense are two different things. No court is going to indict you for reasonably defending yourself. It's not illegal to wear solid rings (and only solid backed rings) or wear steel-toed boots either. If you are forced to escalate against untrained attackers then stomping in the knees is typically the best go-to anyways. The neck is a small target, there's only one, and it doesn't necessarily stop someone if you fuck up your strike placement a little. The joints that act as hinges on your limbs aren't supposed to experience stress in the opposite direction and that stress can dislocate the bones, and the knees have the added benefit of being weight-bearing and lower than their centre of gravity.

Also, please don't make your pepper spray visible if you can, that's seriously bad advice. Although it's more important to have a clear angle downwind than keeping it hidden, telegraphing that you have a weapon is: 1) escalatory; 2) encourages attackers to adapt to your weapon, if not just outright target your weapon hand; and 3) potentially inviting them to change their tactics to harassment at a distance. If someone is threatening or following you, you have to make your shot count before they cover themselves up or move upwind. Imo don't treat things that aren't guns like guns, showing off your spray isn't the same as telling someone you're licensed for concealed carry, no one is going to just have a kevlar vest on them, but nearly everyone wears a shirt in public.

Practice unlocking the cartridge in your bag if you have one. If you're unable to, then you don't really have a choice and are going to have to concede reaction time to your attacker.
Click to expand...
I do disagree there. Take it straight from the horse's mouth.
 
Empress said:
I do disagree there. Take it straight from the horse's mouth.
Click to expand...

the chad morning show segment vs the virgin decade of experience in martial arts and fighting nazis each


that's for a mugging, not for a hate crime. If the goal is to take 40 bucks from someone, the prospect of getting sprayed is obviously going to make it not worth it. If someone is trying to bring harm to you for the sake of doing so, you aren't going to deter them with the threat of being pepper sprayed. If it's part of organised hate, the assailant might actually be more inclined to attack you because harm to oneself is a symbolic act of dedication to their cause.
 
Last edited:
boo836 said:
Canadian here. I've literally fought neo-Nazis. Generally I agree with this but carrying things as weapons and using items as weapons in self defense are two different things. No court is going to indict you for reasonably defending yourself. It's not illegal to wear solid rings (and only solid backed rings) or wear steel-toed boots either.
Click to expand...
good addition! i was coming at this from more of a legal pov, situations like getting pulled over and being questioned about carrying things like knives or pepper spray. even things like those self defense keychains with the pointy bits can be pretty controversial despite them being "intended" as a keychain. nobody will ask twice about jewelry or steel toed boots, though, and you are allowed to have stuff if you have good reason for it (example, baseball bat in the trunk of your car if you actually play baseball)
 
Fellas don't fight unless it's absolutely neccessary. Try to run and make noise whilst running away, run towards more open, busier streets and run laterally. Running is always safer than fighting

I have no idea about self defence beyond that. Courses are helpful from what I've heard
 
Cis male, but I carry Mace with me since my city (as with most) becomes much more dangerous at night. If you make it visible, people are just going to cover their eyes, that's not something that will require a lot of intelligence from an attacker. Also Local Dog is absolutely correct, defense by attacking back really should be a last resort, running/escaping is always the safest move. Maybe one spray if you can do it fast enough but then go.
 
I've seen a lot of talks about guns in here with some dangerous misinformation, so I'd like to throw a quick word in as someone who is both a gun owner (certified to an instructor level in my state) and LGBTQ+ (bisexual/genderfluid).

Open carry is EXTREMELY dangerous, no matter what any form of media or online personality says, and I highly discourage the practice. You are actively making yourself a target if you broadcast to the world that you have a gun on your person in 99% of situations. Most responsible gun owners will tell you that concealed carry is safer and more effective for self-defense. Guns are not the same thing as mace, pepper spray, or any other form of self-defense. Guns of any kind are a heavy responsibility and need to be treated with respect as such. Do not try to learn how to fire and use guns yourself - go to a firing range with an instructor, learn proper trigger discipline (the biggest mistake that gun owners of all experience levels make), learn how to clean your gun to prevent jams, and get an actual permit to conceal carry. Buy a gun safe for proper safekeeping and a reliable holster for proper concealed carry usage, and learn your firing stances. Go to a gun range and practice so that, Arceus forbid, if you ever find yourself in a dangerous situation you don't hurt yourself or any other innocents in a dicey situation. The world is scary right now, I understand, but that doesn't mean we should disregard basic gun safety protocols. Please be safe, thanks.
 
Morkal said:
I've seen a lot of talks about guns in here with some dangerous misinformation, so I'd like to throw a quick word in as someone who is both a gun owner (certified to an instructor level in my state) and LGBTQ+ (bisexual/genderfluid).

Open carry is EXTREMELY dangerous, no matter what any form of media or online personality says, and I highly discourage the practice. You are actively making yourself a target if you broadcast to the world that you have a gun on your person in 99% of situations. Most responsible gun owners will tell you that concealed carry is safer and more effective for self-defense. Guns are not the same thing as mace, pepper spray, or any other form of self-defense. Guns of any kind are a heavy responsibility and need to be treated with respect as such. Do not try to learn how to fire and use guns yourself - go to a firing range with an instructor, learn proper trigger discipline (the biggest mistake that gun owners of all experience levels make), learn how to clean your gun to prevent jams, and get an actual permit to conceal carry. Buy a gun safe for proper safekeeping and a reliable holster for proper concealed carry usage, and learn your firing stances. Go to a gun range and practice so that, Arceus forbid, if you ever find yourself in a dangerous situation you don't hurt yourself or any other innocents in a dicey situation. The world is scary right now, I understand, but that doesn't mean we should disregard basic gun safety protocols. Please be safe, thanks.
Click to expand...

Never used a gun in my life, as they've always rubbed me the wrong way, for the exact reason you described; they're a huge responsibility and the slightest screw-up can be wildly dangerous. Agreed, don't just carry one around without experience, especially if you're tryna make it known to attackers. Thank you for writing this.

On another note...

TIL that "androsexual" is a term. Finally, I have something to effectively describe my orientation as.
 
Hi, I've decided to announce that I am pansexual. Since I was 16, I've known I've been attracted to both girls and boys, which I was able to find out due to watching The Owl House (great show btw.) When I saw Lgbtqia+ relationships normalised there, and I started digging deeper into the queer community. I thought about whether I truly was straight, as I had always had thoughts about romantically involved with men in some dreams, and I realised I was into men, thus I thought I was bisexual.
I was happy with my orientation for a while until about 6 months ago, when I found out more about queer characterisation, and I felt like I would love people no matter their orientation. I slowly realised that I was not bisexual, but in fact pansexual.
I have not come out to my family, as they are not very accomodating with queer people, they like to complain about how there are "too many queer designations", and I just kinda don't want to deal with that. I think this is a place that I can express who I am without any reprecussions, my parents most likely will support me, but I don't want to take any chances.
 
This is something I've known about myself for quite some time, spanning back to my teenage years, but largely kept it to myself out of embarrassment or some form of denial. I'm somewhere on the ace spectrum. Truthfully, I don't know where and don't think I ever will. I can and have had sexual attraction to others but rarely obtain pleasure from PIV sex regardless of who I'm with. I have a strong desire for kink-related play which is largely what keeps me from identifying in full as ace.

That said, I still just say I'm straight. I feel like my situation is too specific to explain to someone if they casually asked my sexuality (doesn't help that I'm extremely masculine facing and assumed to be straight). I also don't really feel any connection to the LGBTIQA community. I know there are some people that don't take it as seriously as someone that identifies as LGBT and that's okay. I don't care much for labels anyway as I think they just box you in whereas my personal belief is that everyone is somewhere on a spectrum of sexuality which makes coming to terms with one's identity easier for some than others.
 
Last edited:
faint said:
This is something I've known about myself for quite some time, spanning back to my teenage years, but largely kept it to myself out of embarrassment or some form of denial. I'm somewhere on the ace spectrum. Truthfully, I don't know where and don't think I ever will. I can and have had sexual attraction to others but rarely obtain pleasure from PIV sex regardless of who I'm with. I have a strong desire for kink-related play which is largely what keeps me from identifying in full as ace.

That said, I still just say I'm straight. I feel like my situation is too specific to explain to someone if they casually asked my sexuality (doesn't help that I'm extremely masculine facing and assumed to be straight). I also don't really feel any connection to the LGBTIQA community. I know there are some people that don't take it as seriously as someone that identifies as LGBT and that's okay. I don't care much for labels anyway as I think they just box you in whereas my personal belief is that everyone is somewhere on a spectrum of sexuality which makes coming to terms with one's identity easier for some than others.
Click to expand...

Hey friend, I've had a journey quite similar to this too and I'm happy you're finding a label (or lack thereof) that fits you!

There's no strict qualifications for what constitutes as ace, and you can definitely be both straight and ace and you can enjoy sex and still be ace, if that at all helps you in finding a definition that works for you. All that matters is your own happiness and comfort, there is no quota you have to meet, and we're all rooting for you!
 
Glad for this thread. I see the recent discussions and would be curious the context of why some feel certain types or self-defense are necessary and where. There is a huge variance. I live in the United States and never felt unsafe in the larger cities (250K + people), but am on my guard to bring attention to myself when travelling through small towns. The largest cities will often have many blocks of extremely gay friendly areas where queer people can at times outnumber straight people.
 
hi everyone.. just came by to say i think being non binary suits me better. after trying out identifying as a girl for idk like 3 years now i feel like what i was looking for the most is that freedom of self expression. i still like being referred to as a girl as well but i feel more comfortable with a more neutral approach to things .. im still trying to wrap my brain around it all but i just wanted to get this off my chest. thank you to all my friends for the love and support
 
I’m genderfluid bisexual but I live in an extremely Christian right wing household. My father in particular is a full blown MAGA cultist and pretty consistently goes on homophobic and transphobic tirades.

Because of this I’m extremely scared to come out or even risk my family accidentally being clued into my identity. I used to paint my nails for sometime but kinda stopped doing it after an incident where my car broke down and I didn’t have the tools to fix it with me, so I called my dad and the whole time he was helping me he was talking about how I would rather paint my nails than make sure my car is in working order (which again I just forgot to put tools back in my car). Not even many of my closest friends know about me, and those that do have to refer to me as he/him around my family (I prefer they/them mainly, and she/her to a lesser degree). While being active in the mons community has allowed me to express myself more comfortably in a way, it still kind of bothers me that I have to hide part of myself in real life until I’m able to move out, which is no easy thing to do where I live.

I also don’t hate my parents, I truly believe that they have my best interests at heart, they’re just, stuck in the past. I don’t want to cut ties with them, but I would like to be able to be myself too, it’s a really hard dilemma for me.
 
Last edited:
cyclonez_ said:
It's really frustrating being a queer American right now, but it's so, SO relieving to see that people in other countries are still seeing massive progress. Big congrats to any LGBTQ+ Japanese people!!
Click to expand...
Was talking to a friend of mine and I have more good news for you, this time from Thailand
Briefly:
  • 400/415 members of the Lower House voted in favour of a bill that would recognize same-sex marriage
  • It would allow same-sex couples to adopt children, as well as gives them marital tax savings, the ability to inherit property, and the ability to make medical treatment consent
  • The bill needs approval from the Upper House, the Senate, and then needs Royal endorsement. It is expected to become law by the end of 2024.
    • If it becomes law, it would make Thailand the only southeast asian country to recognize same-sex marriage.
News source:
(I also heard some of what I wrote from said friend, so I'd recommend checking out the article + doing further reasearch because obviosuly "trust me bro" isn't a great source)
 
Aqua Jet said:
Was talking to a friend of mine and I have more good news for you, this time from Thailand
Briefly:
  • 400/415 members of the Lower House voted in favour of a bill that would recognize same-sex marriage
  • It would allow same-sex couples to adopt children, as well as gives them marital tax savings, the ability to inherit property, and the ability to make medical treatment consent
  • The bill needs approval from the Upper House, the Senate, and then needs Royal endorsement. It is expected to become law by the end of 2024.
    • If it becomes law, it would make Thailand the only southeast asian country to recognize same-sex marriage.
News source:
(I also heard some of what I wrote from said friend, so I'd recommend checking out the article + doing further reasearch because obviosuly "trust me bro" isn't a great source)
Click to expand...
Okay, I love asia, but let me say, asia is based af for decisions like these. I know there is most likely asian countries that are heavily anti-LGBTQIA+, but at least they are getting on the right track.
Western countries, step up and start doing stuff like this, inclusivity is very important.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top