Hey pal, I wouldn't sweat it, in Middle School, I'd generally just walk around by myself, all lonely, and really, just like how you are feeling now. However, the second I walked into high school, it seemed so much easier to integrate, my grades shot up and all... I just walked in to a couple of guys, said a few greetings, joined in to conversation, and now, They're like my best friends, no backstabbing or shit, and it feels like we've been on this like forever... So yeah.
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- Thread starter User 40136
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Everyone gets these times when you're down in the dumps, but look up! There's the Sun in the sky. I'm sure you'll get past this and find some friends. Maybe join a club or something or even start a club about your interests! A few of us in my school got a whole bunch of people to start playing Pokemon, even the 'cool' kids. It's not that bad.
In Middle School, people are already talking about love and relationships. Sometimes, you're just not ready. Don't sweat that kind of stuff until later. As for partying, so what? Middle School parties ain't that great. Find some people you can relate to in school, maybe just join random conversations and sooner or later, you'll have a bunch of friends you'll never forget.
As for the computer addiction, I had that too. But you need to learn how to control your time well and stuff. Joining a sports team or some other club can help with your organization skills. Have a nice day!
In Middle School, people are already talking about love and relationships. Sometimes, you're just not ready. Don't sweat that kind of stuff until later. As for partying, so what? Middle School parties ain't that great. Find some people you can relate to in school, maybe just join random conversations and sooner or later, you'll have a bunch of friends you'll never forget.
As for the computer addiction, I had that too. But you need to learn how to control your time well and stuff. Joining a sports team or some other club can help with your organization skills. Have a nice day!
Most importantly, be yourself. Don't be a complete different person. People don't like it. Just chill, join some clubs as UKF said, and try to make friends. Honestly, its not that bad, and I'm sure you'll get out of this mess.
Good luck!
Good luck!
Try playing some kind of sports. It's good for you and is easy to meet new people. I play soccer for my school team and also practice martial arts. You have no idea how it helps the socialization part of your problem.
How long until high school?
IMO you should just knuckle down until high school ( if thats bearable ) and then start afresh. Noone will have friends and if they do, they will still be ready for new ones. I went to a top selective HS with 6 mates yet only 2 are still best friends. If you can wait and then study hard for entrance exams, even if you dont get in, youll have plenty of oppertunities to be outgoing.
Yeah, I go to a top HS but still suck at spelling
Dont worry and Good luck
EDIT: I met most of my friends through sport
IMO you should just knuckle down until high school ( if thats bearable ) and then start afresh. Noone will have friends and if they do, they will still be ready for new ones. I went to a top selective HS with 6 mates yet only 2 are still best friends. If you can wait and then study hard for entrance exams, even if you dont get in, youll have plenty of oppertunities to be outgoing.
Yeah, I go to a top HS but still suck at spelling
Dont worry and Good luck
EDIT: I met most of my friends through sport
I'm Australian and I go to the best school in my State (Probably country), and to get there, all I had to do was 3 simple things;
1. Work based on goals, not on time. People like to think you can't have fun and do well at the same time. Those people are wrong. Focus on what you would like to get done, and think if you think this is manageable. If it isn't decide what you can, and are willing to do in one day.
For example, if you feel you need to memorise something (sorry, I have no idea about the American Curriculum), dedicate a one hour session to knowing half of it off by heart, take a rest and do the remainder later. Similarly, if you want to improve your general mathematical ability (and most notably, speed), you'll probably want to sit down for 2-3 hours, and then work at past papers. Don't leave until its done, just focus completely.
2. Eliminate all distractions while you are doing work. That means you don't do anything that isn't productive while you are working. i.e. No playing games, no watching TV while you work, no eating. Toilet and drinking are fine, but if possible, do them beforehand, since they can ruin your focus.
I'm quite aware that some temptations, such as in your case, the computer, can be extremely alluring and your reasoning, "I'll just spend 5 minutes reading new threads on Smogon" seems quite sound. However, one thing will lead to another, and not only will you waste time not working, but you'll find it harder to get back into focus. One technique I find is effective is turning your computer off, and leaving a post-it reminding yourself of your goals.
If that doesn't work for you, try and go one day with no gaming, no procreastination, and if you can do that, use that reasoning to go cold turkey everyday, with the exception of perhaps night times for relaxation.
3. Following on from my previous point, take time to relax, but certainly don't overdo it. You seem to like procreastinating, and you should, its naturally de-stressing by not thinking about what you're supposed to be doing.
However, do this in moderation. Now, I don't think its essential, but a time-table can really help you decide when to work, and when you can take a break. If you feel you don't need one, I suggest having a dedicated time to take a break. Typically, when I'm at home studying, I'll take a break after lunch for a while, finish work after dinner, but the rest of the time, I'm being productive.
In addition, by picking these select times, you can often maximise your enjoyment, and this can condition you to work to your routine better. Its a bit complicated, so I think an explanation is in order. My mutual crush (i.e. She'd be my GF, but we are in the middle of our final High School exams, so nows a bad time), typically starts using her computer during the late afternoon, and pretty much, if don't talk to each other a lot, we both start to go insane. Obviously, its more enjoyable for me to be talking to her, and videogaming with my guy friends during the night, so during the day time, if I feel like procrastinating, it gets quite boring. As such, I'm more motivated to work during the day, since I can't satisfy my urge to socialise, while I'm also more inclined to take a break during the night.
Now, I did actually read the Entire OP so to address your non-academic concern;
You sound a lot like me, when I was a kid (i.e. when I was like 6 or 7). During that time, I had very few friends, and we weren't all that tight. I was a bit of a loner because I was quite smart (I won't say nerdy, because I'm actually more of a jock at my school, the line tends to blur in gifted schools, just another piece of advice for the OP. Lets leave it at a bit of both).
To make friends, I obviously had to break out of my shell. I began to talk quite frequently to other people. Typically, this sort of action will get you recognised as a friend, as long as you don't try too hard. People will generally interact with people who interact with them. You can start by waving at people casually as you pass them by. From there, try and whip up a casual conversation. Don't try and force it for the sake of doing so and be quite honest. Girls, in particular, do like it when you have a genuine conversation with them, so perhaps that can assist you with what I assume is a desire for a significant other(?) as well. If you feel like you want to get to know a person a bit better than a casual acquaintance, contrary to popular belief, you are actually going to have to do some groundwork. The only times people get inducted into new social groups is when a fad blurs the cliques together (my school doesn't really have them being gifted and all), and by the end, groups have changed, or when you're a new kid. Any IM program is a great way to get to know someone in a low pressure environment.
I hope my post was helpful. Good Luck
1. Work based on goals, not on time. People like to think you can't have fun and do well at the same time. Those people are wrong. Focus on what you would like to get done, and think if you think this is manageable. If it isn't decide what you can, and are willing to do in one day.
For example, if you feel you need to memorise something (sorry, I have no idea about the American Curriculum), dedicate a one hour session to knowing half of it off by heart, take a rest and do the remainder later. Similarly, if you want to improve your general mathematical ability (and most notably, speed), you'll probably want to sit down for 2-3 hours, and then work at past papers. Don't leave until its done, just focus completely.
2. Eliminate all distractions while you are doing work. That means you don't do anything that isn't productive while you are working. i.e. No playing games, no watching TV while you work, no eating. Toilet and drinking are fine, but if possible, do them beforehand, since they can ruin your focus.
I'm quite aware that some temptations, such as in your case, the computer, can be extremely alluring and your reasoning, "I'll just spend 5 minutes reading new threads on Smogon" seems quite sound. However, one thing will lead to another, and not only will you waste time not working, but you'll find it harder to get back into focus. One technique I find is effective is turning your computer off, and leaving a post-it reminding yourself of your goals.
If that doesn't work for you, try and go one day with no gaming, no procreastination, and if you can do that, use that reasoning to go cold turkey everyday, with the exception of perhaps night times for relaxation.
3. Following on from my previous point, take time to relax, but certainly don't overdo it. You seem to like procreastinating, and you should, its naturally de-stressing by not thinking about what you're supposed to be doing.
However, do this in moderation. Now, I don't think its essential, but a time-table can really help you decide when to work, and when you can take a break. If you feel you don't need one, I suggest having a dedicated time to take a break. Typically, when I'm at home studying, I'll take a break after lunch for a while, finish work after dinner, but the rest of the time, I'm being productive.
In addition, by picking these select times, you can often maximise your enjoyment, and this can condition you to work to your routine better. Its a bit complicated, so I think an explanation is in order. My mutual crush (i.e. She'd be my GF, but we are in the middle of our final High School exams, so nows a bad time), typically starts using her computer during the late afternoon, and pretty much, if don't talk to each other a lot, we both start to go insane. Obviously, its more enjoyable for me to be talking to her, and videogaming with my guy friends during the night, so during the day time, if I feel like procrastinating, it gets quite boring. As such, I'm more motivated to work during the day, since I can't satisfy my urge to socialise, while I'm also more inclined to take a break during the night.
Now, I did actually read the Entire OP so to address your non-academic concern;
You sound a lot like me, when I was a kid (i.e. when I was like 6 or 7). During that time, I had very few friends, and we weren't all that tight. I was a bit of a loner because I was quite smart (I won't say nerdy, because I'm actually more of a jock at my school, the line tends to blur in gifted schools, just another piece of advice for the OP. Lets leave it at a bit of both).
To make friends, I obviously had to break out of my shell. I began to talk quite frequently to other people. Typically, this sort of action will get you recognised as a friend, as long as you don't try too hard. People will generally interact with people who interact with them. You can start by waving at people casually as you pass them by. From there, try and whip up a casual conversation. Don't try and force it for the sake of doing so and be quite honest. Girls, in particular, do like it when you have a genuine conversation with them, so perhaps that can assist you with what I assume is a desire for a significant other(?) as well. If you feel like you want to get to know a person a bit better than a casual acquaintance, contrary to popular belief, you are actually going to have to do some groundwork. The only times people get inducted into new social groups is when a fad blurs the cliques together (my school doesn't really have them being gifted and all), and by the end, groups have changed, or when you're a new kid. Any IM program is a great way to get to know someone in a low pressure environment.
I hope my post was helpful. Good Luck