• Check out the relaunch of our general collection, with classic designs and new ones by our very own Pissog!

Mental illness

I've never been diagnosed with anything, but I know that I suffered from fairly severe social anxiety and selective mutism for a few years. I still have occasional manifestations of SA in certain circumstances, but I've mostly overcome it. I am also fairly confident that I had some form of OCD when I was young. If I noticed that I had touched something in a particular way, I had to touch it again in the same way with the other side of my body to make things "even". If I touched it in the "wrong" manner, I would have to retouch until I got it "right", which could be pretty awkward at times! This has also mostly subsided, but I suspect I may still have mild OCD: I sometimes feel compelled to repeat or recheck minor things numerous times to "settle" my mind, even when I know for a fact that everything is in order. This isn't frequent or disrupting enough to affect my life at all though.
 
Chubbs, Autism is when the synapses in your brain are formed atypically, and unlike other brain disorders there isn't really clear specific mechanism involved, every autistic person is different. What this affects is your senses, we see, hear, taste, smell, and feel differently. Some changes are slight, like I hear better out of one ear. Some people are so autistic that you can't get through to them at all, the sensory world they live in so alien by normal standards. Autism can cause blindness, deafness, it tends to go hand in hand tuberous sclerosis and just odd motor skills in general.

The diagnostic criteria tends to fall around our different, diminished, or non-existent sense of empathy (a compound sense that relies on sight, sound, and touch). Some people are shy or anti-social, but an autistic person without a sense of empathy literally doesn't know the first thing about human interaction or the feelings of others. You can learn those things, but they don't teach them in school. No one ever teaches you to look someone in the eyes when speaking to them. It is just something normal people understand.

I've also spent my whole life (I mean, if I had a dime for every time I said this) saying "I'm not like everyone". Someone would make the argument, "You did A because of B, because everyone does A because of B", and I'd say "I'm not everyone." Now I tend to only say it to girls (i.e. "all guys just want sex" or along those lines).
 
Well, my little brother has Autism supposedly. I'm only saying supposedly because they're not sure if they can trust the Doctor's word, but he's grown up pretty well. Or, at least as normal as any little boy can get.

Myself, my family's somewhat divided if I have ADD or Aspergers. Not that I've really been to the Doctor's in a while, but I can say that it hasn't really effected me. Not that I doubt I likely have something, but...yeah. I kinda pity those people who suffer from that kind of stuff.
 
I also suffer from social anxiety, although various psychiatrists have disagreed as to whether I actually have full-blown social anxiety disorder. I've gotten better at coping with it over the years, although there are still some things I need to work on. I still am completely terrified of talking on the phone to anyone except my parents... this has definitely interfered with my life, especially when searching for jobs and internships (which often requires talking to people on the phone).. usually in these situations where I absolutely have to make a phone call, I'll take beta-blockers, which help somewhat. Otherwise, I don't take anything for it, since it's unnecessary outside of acute situations like that.
I also get quite intimidated in social situations where I don't know anyone very well. As long as I know someone, I'm usually OK, but when I'm in a completely new social environment, I tend to just avoid people. I almost never start a conversation with someone I don't know very well, because I never know if they actually want to talk to me or not-- I generally just wait for people to come to me. I've probably missed out on a lot of great friendships that way...

The thing is, anyone who talks to me on a regular basis or even meets me for the first time if I'm with friends probably wouldn't even realize I have social anxiety at all unless they were very good at picking up on things, since I've gotten pretty good at hiding it. I've only told a few people about it in my life... and now all of you know about it too... so yeah
 
The thing is, anyone who talks to me on a regular basis or even meets me for the first time if I'm with friends probably wouldn't even realize I have social anxiety at all unless they were very good at picking up on things, since I've gotten pretty good at hiding it. I've only told a few people about it in my life... and now all of you know about it too... so yeah

Except that you can be insanely outgoing as well, so I think it's a bit more transient. :D
 
I also suffer from social anxiety, although various psychiatrists have disagreed as to whether I actually have full-blown social anxiety disorder. I've gotten better at coping with it over the years, although there are still some things I need to work on. I still am completely terrified of talking on the phone to anyone except my parents... this has definitely interfered with my life, especially when searching for jobs and internships (which often requires talking to people on the phone).. usually in these situations where I absolutely have to make a phone call, I'll take beta-blockers, which help somewhat. Otherwise, I don't take anything for it, since it's unnecessary outside of acute situations like that.
I also get quite intimidated in social situations where I don't know anyone very well. As long as I know someone, I'm usually OK, but when I'm in a completely new social environment, I tend to just avoid people. I almost never start a conversation with someone I don't know very well, because I never know if they actually want to talk to me or not-- I generally just wait for people to come to me. I've probably missed out on a lot of great friendships that way...

The thing is, anyone who talks to me on a regular basis or even meets me for the first time if I'm with friends probably wouldn't even realize I have social anxiety at all unless they were very good at picking up on things, since I've gotten pretty good at hiding it. I've only told a few people about it in my life... and now all of you know about it too... so yeah

Seems like you're just a little shy. It's not that unusual to be a little nervous in certain social situations. I get uncomfortable when I have to be formal, for example. It doesn't feel like I'm being myself, so I get a little nervous about that.
 
I'm Bi-Polar. Was diagnosed as a kid and put on all sorts of mood stabilizing drugs. Drugs fucked up my metabolism and gave me kidney stones so I said "Fuck that" and stopped taking them. Been doing relatively fine.

Drugs are great for some people, but for me I just kinda came to the realization that I was essentially taking unhealthy expensive placebos and that I just needed to have some more self control. I still get the mood swings but I'm getting good at recognizing them and shutting down when they come.
 
I had depression for about 3 years, until in became serious in the beggining of my Junior year in high school. It really is a shame, those were crucial years in deciding my academic career. Near the end of 8th grade I began acting "odd." According to my parents over the summer between middle school and high school I "changed." My entire family noticed it as well. Freshman year I had a good 93 average between my classes, though my grades inched lower as the year went on. Sophomore year, it dropped to about a 90 average. When Junior year popped around, I just gave up. Had a 76 average. Failed a few classes, and was barely hanging on to the core classes that were passing. My life at home was much worse than that. My relationship with my Mom and Dad became unbearable, and I didn't understand why. I couldn't speak to them, I didn't want to see them at all but I was far too stuck in my own world to talk to the few friends I managed to hang on to. Needless to say my social life and personal lives died before me. Hell, on top of me.

When I look back it all sounds juvenile. My parents would moan at me about grades, my sister would say I'm throwing all my success away, my aunt would ask what happened to me. I don't understand why these hurt me so bad. I don't understand why I got so angered at the comments. It took nothing at all to irritate me, and I would toss myself into my room and sit there for hours doing nothing. I became sensetive to everything, cried at little comments that shouldn't even scathe a normal person. Between this time I started feeling completely seperate from the real world. I'd hurt myself quite alot because most of the time I didn't even know if I was still alive. I know it sounds awful cliche, but that's how it was. I was in my own world, one I didn't particularly like much. I really didn't know if I was alive sometimes because of how lifeless and cold I had become. At some point I don't think I felt anything. At all. Or at least I didn't think I felt anything. All the stress I acquired made nights sleepless, and the next day easily worse than the last. I commonly had dreams were I succesfully killed myself, and they were enjoyable.

I would think alot. And just thinking stressed me out so badly, it gave me headaches. School became a blur, and my best efforts yielded minimal results. I wouldn't look myself in the mirror anymore because it scared me. When people wanted to take photos I would try to quietly scoot away, which resulted in my lashing out saying I don't want to be in a photo. I tried to kill myself countless times. There wasn't a moment in my life where I thought suicide wasn't an option. But I would be too scared to do it. This made me even more depressed. Every failed suicide attempt drove me miles deeper into depression.

Ugh, I don't want to go into more details anymore, because where I used to be is a very scary thought. Eventually my Mom and Dad got me some help, and I slowly got better, and somehow managed to pass by the end of the year. Needless to say my chances of getting into a top quality college became pretty abysmal. Before summer vacation I started feeling the way I used to, and it made me really very happy. I managed to get a job and hung out with the few friends I had over the summer. Actually, a month or two ago my doctor told me I actually also have Hypothyriodism. This is basically a disease where I don't produce enough of a certain hormone, so I become very lazy and fatigued, and get serious trouble focusing. This without a doubt had an influence on my depression. So now I'm taking medication for that. And am again, starting to feel much better.

I'm not where I used to be academically, but 88 isn't a terrible average for my senior year. I'm hoping to attend a community college and transfer over to one of those dream colleges I had hoped to go to. So, things are looking optimistic!
 
No one ever teaches you to look someone in the eyes when speaking to them. It is just something normal people understand.

This is something I have trouble with. I know it makes people feel weird, but I can't help it. I have to make a conscious effort to look people I don't know in the eye and even then I usually look away fairly quickly because it makes me anxious.

I think I have ADHD but I think I may be a hypochondriac. I've definitely got symptoms of ADHD, though. That link KB posted to totallyadd.com I took the test and got 9/9 Inattentive and 6/9 Hyperactive/Impulsive. It would also explain many of my "quirks." I was the smartest kid in class who didn't do any homework but got 100s on every in class assignment. I'm easily distracted by things and I go into hyperfocus when solving puzzles / playing video games. I _ALWAYS_ forget to do some sort of daily task at work.

I'm not sure if getting diagnosed and getting treatment if it turns out I have it is worth it though. I'm not a huge fan of drugs (3-5 caffeinated drinks a week being my only intake) and I feel like I could live a happy successful life and manage my symptoms if I was more responsible / less lazy. Of course, if I have ADHD being responsible / not "lazy" is kind of not possible, so I don't know.
 
I started having lapses of consciousness as early as age 13. I first noticed when I would play DDR and go for "all Perfects" and be doing 100% (no break) with about 10 seconds left to go, then all of the sudden be staring straight at a game over screen. Throughout high school, I would zone out mid-sentence during face-to-face conversations with people and they got pretty worried. Needless to say this was all pretty embarrassing. I was so worried that I would never even drive since I might lose consciousness, but when I had my permit I did not have a single problem -- I guess there's too much to handle mentally for my brain to shut off, who knows.

The seizures didn't show up until I was 19, the morning after a show with my band. I headed into work on a Saturday and i couldn't quite hear well (it felt like I was changing pressure zones, like under water or in an airplane). The last thing I remember from that morning was checking my email. When I woke up, I was blind and extremely frantic. The paramedics were trying to calm me down and stop me from moving so I could be put in a stretcher, but out of my confusion I yelled "get off me! get off me!" along with various curse words over and over again. Once on the ambulance they told me I had had a seizure. As I regained my sight and other senses, I felt the pain in my forehead both from mental fatigue and a striking blow I took when I hit it on the sharp corner of my desk. I had seized for 3 minutes straight and bit my tongue to the point of bleeding.

My driver's license was revoked and I was put on depakot, which fucked up my liver functions. I switched to an antidepressant called Lamictal and got my license back in 4 months, 2 months less than I should have in my state. I didn't have my next seizure until two days before my 21st birthday. After this I had a string of six seizures until I was 22. My girlfriend has witnessed 6 out of 8 and knows exactly how to handle them. She tells me my most recent ones got progressively more mild, lasting barely up to a minute with minimal shaking.

I'm 24 now and there have been no recent seizures, but I am taking the max dosage of Lamictal allowed. I still have moments in conversations where I have to stop and think hard about what the other person said, even if it's the most trivial point. Luckily I don't suffer hallucinations.
 
@ vonFielder - Thanks a lot for that, it kind of makes me feel better about it, knowing what I actually have. Oh, and I used to have absolutely zero empathy at all when I was younger and it was something that really took some time to learn.
 
@Ivar: That was a highly PROFOUND STATEMENT. I have a (mild) mental illness and a very high IQ, and one other person I know who claims to use Smogon has OCD and an IQ of 149.

My IQ is apparently 148 (tested by an educational psychologist) - it's never done me any fucking good.
 
ex-OCD, yeah. OCD is massively self-diagnosed by people - 'oh i don't like ketchup on my chips, i like it at the side, it's OCD'. There was a girl in the psychiatric ward who had OCD - she used to wrap herself in clingfilm, and wear plastic gloves to stop her touching things. She used to sit in the same chair, in the corridor away from all the other patients, perfectly still every day, all day.

Amusing aside: the schizophrenic (not the only one, but the most obvious one) in the psych ward actually nicked a pair of scissors out of the OCD girl's room. OCD girl obviously went mental (people with germs touching her things) so she shouted at the schizophrenic that really set her off - things about her mother, who the schizo was going through an obsession with - and the schizophrenic, to get her own back, walked into the middle of the OCD girl's room and spat over everything. An almighty shitstorm ensued. It was magnificent.
 
ex-OCD, yeah. OCD is massively self-diagnosed by people - 'oh i don't like ketchup on my chips, i like it at the side, it's OCD'. There was a girl in the psychiatric ward who had OCD - she used to wrap herself in clingfilm, and wear plastic gloves to stop her touching things.
I used to have impulsion phobias and I avoided the sockets because I thought it would electrice me if I touched the metal part of some conectors... I also had moral obsessions, and a few months ago I had a paranoid episode about people who was hearing and seeing me. A year ago I had another about people saying bad thinks about me.

But my psycholigist says I don't have any trastorn -in the group of people who have hallucinations, only a 4% have schizophrenia-.
 
Wow. Just wow. How did it end?

Things smashed, screaming on both sides, ward staff intervention, schizophrenic going on an absolute rampage through the ward and threatening/trying to kill the OCD girl, and the ward nurse threatening to summararily discharge the OCD girl and send her home if she didn't behave better (which I thought was more than a little harsh, seeing as it wasn't her fault in the first place).
 
Autism (possibly Asperger's), Tourette's and I used to be bipolar.

Fortunately my Autism is very mild and manifests itself in emotional detachment, mental maths skills, lack of social skills and a like for order and structure. My brother is similar, Autism with SAD that he has thankfully supressed.
 
has anyone else noticed that a large portion of message boards seems to have some mental issues as well as at least 140 IQ?

I wonder if there is a correlation, if people are genuinely that polluted mentally or if people are simply full of shit?
 
Autism (possibly Asperger's), Tourette's and I used to be bipolar.

Fortunately my Autism is very mild and manifests itself in emotional detachment, mental maths skills, lack of social skills and a like for order and structure. My brother is similar, Autism with SAD that he has thankfully supressed.


You used to be bipolar? Your brother suppressed his seasonal affective?
Sorry, but I don't see how either of those work.
 
Back
Top