Most women who one would consider an 8,9 or 10 got 10s if not hundreds of message a day from other males, most likely a few will be way better looking or be in a better financial situation so yeah or who is more accomplished, its not a viable option for shy people as people make it to be lol...and don't listen if girls say looks wont make that much of an impact on their decision on who to reply to or not, they're fucking lying if they do >_> I tried it for a bit and got quite a number of messages myself but mostly girls who were more interested in one night stands rather then relationships, you can never get a good convo going with them hoes. If you wanna attract those kinda girls just upload pics of abs or pecs lolz otherwise getting legit girls is kinda hard for the reasons I mentioned above. Getting to get a convo going with a girl let alone get to go out with her is alot harder then people think, even if you are good looking, just dont have high expectations as it'll only make it more bitter when you get no replies / messages.
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Social Online Dating
- Thread starter McGrrr
- Start date
One of the peculiar things, IMO about online dating, is that (once you're excollege and not meeting new people all the time) even if you're not really into it, you basically HAVE to do online dating.
The pool of people trying to date without online dating is so small that you're unlikely to find many options doung it. The highest EV for finding someone is to go online. Therefore most people go online, strengthening the bias and increasing the incentive while making it harder to find a match.
I don't think you can have an easy time dating ex-college, especially if you exclude coworkers (and you should), without going online. It's the way of the world now.
The pool of people trying to date without online dating is so small that you're unlikely to find many options doung it. The highest EV for finding someone is to go online. Therefore most people go online, strengthening the bias and increasing the incentive while making it harder to find a match.
I don't think you can have an easy time dating ex-college, especially if you exclude coworkers (and you should), without going online. It's the way of the world now.
Oh come on, I find it a hard time to believe that it's difficult to meet new people just cause you're post-college.
I'm somewhat in agreement with MrIndigo. It's my first year of graduate school and I'm living by myself, swamped with work basically all the time, and not interested in anyone in my department. After a couple months the bed dries up a little. You meet everyone new and their friends, you frequent the local game stores and get to know the social circles there, and I personally go to a rock climbing gym a couple times a week. I don't drink often and I'm not really good at negotiating conversations in a bar environment. Very rarely, I'll have a pleasant conversation with someone on the bus.
So I made an OKCupid profile at some point to test the waters, not really expecting anything, and I didn't really get much out of that either. Messaging people felt awkward, and I only ever got a couple replies, even then the conversations really didn't go anywhere interesting. Kinda felt like meeting people normally to be honest, just about as forced as walking up to someone in a bar or on the street and talking to them. It's good to know it's an option though.
The thing about college is that it was pretty easy to meet people naturally. You lived communally with a lot of people, you ate in the same places as everyone else, and almost every class and semester stirred the pool significantly. It wasn't too hard to start a conversation either, since a lot of people are living the same kind of life as you are.
I guess I'm just having trouble transitioning to the adult world as far as dating goes. The way everything flows is a bit different, but online dating feels like a natural extension of the real world in that respect.
So I made an OKCupid profile at some point to test the waters, not really expecting anything, and I didn't really get much out of that either. Messaging people felt awkward, and I only ever got a couple replies, even then the conversations really didn't go anywhere interesting. Kinda felt like meeting people normally to be honest, just about as forced as walking up to someone in a bar or on the street and talking to them. It's good to know it's an option though.
The thing about college is that it was pretty easy to meet people naturally. You lived communally with a lot of people, you ate in the same places as everyone else, and almost every class and semester stirred the pool significantly. It wasn't too hard to start a conversation either, since a lot of people are living the same kind of life as you are.
I guess I'm just having trouble transitioning to the adult world as far as dating goes. The way everything flows is a bit different, but online dating feels like a natural extension of the real world in that respect.
I have been in several long distance relationships that initially started as strictly online relationships. I wouldn't consider myself to be shy or lacking confidence, though, and I don't really have any problems hanging out with girls. I've dated locally, too, but sometimes I feel like the selection of women available in my area is not really in line with my tastes. It could just be that all the girls my type around here are too busy bumming around their house reading books and playing games for me to have met them.
That said, I've never tried OkCupid or any other dating service like that. Just plain not interested. I don't look down on people for using those kinds of things, though, and I know a few people who have had luck with sites like that. More power to them.
That said, I've never tried OkCupid or any other dating service like that. Just plain not interested. I don't look down on people for using those kinds of things, though, and I know a few people who have had luck with sites like that. More power to them.
I think, if you go to a large, hobby based forum, start talking amd know people there, it will turn out much nicer than going to a site that solely does online dating.
Not only the former is safer, it also guarantees you to meet like minded people.
I cant be the only one who got my boyfriend from a Pokemon forum.
Not only the former is safer, it also guarantees you to meet like minded people.
I cant be the only one who got my boyfriend from a Pokemon forum.
People still get catfished? I thought this was 2014-almost-2015.
Anyway, right now dating in any form doesn't really appeal to me. I have an extremely high sex drive, so basically it's just "sex! sex sex sex sex sex!" so I feel that if I even tried dating it'd become clear early on that I'm only in it for the sex - or at least, I would come off that way even if I am legitimately interested in the person for non-sex reasons. My current priority is just simply satisfying my sex drive rather than entering a serious relationship, that way I don't end up entering a relationship with an unsatisfied high sex drive. However, once I am concerning myself with entering a serious relationship, I wouldn't be opposed to online dating - It'd really just be a matter of doing homework to be able to look out for fake profiles, catfishes, and whatnot. However, I don't really struggle with meeting people offline (probably because I'm in college) so I don't think I'd need it. In my mind, I see it as more of a last resort than a primary source of dating.
Lol, really your 19 and you probably had sex around 3 times? And no this was probably when I was 13 or 14 or something.
I have two friends that have found significant others (one ended up married with two kids) using online dating. I do not believe it is anything to be shamed of nor should be viewed as a lesser means of dating. I do believe it is important to make a physical meeting as soon as possible however, since you need that "tangible" feeling to the relationship.
I actually what you might call a horror story experience with online dating, though I blame it on my own naivete more than the medium. Had a girl actually message me and say I was cute, which was a new experience for me. That being said, talking to her even via messages on OK Cupid quickly raised doubts about our compatibility, but there was one thing that suckered me in; she had problems, and it's damn hard for me to pass up the chance to try and solve other people's problems. Which of course often means I bite off more than I can chew, and good god did I bite off more than I could chew here. Her mental state was far, far worse than her initial messages let on, and her initial messages already didn't paint an image of mental stability. I just ended up getting sucked in deeper and deeper trying to somehow help her out of the horrible position her severe mental illness put her in, but eventually (thanks to the advice of some friends) I had to bail out to keep my own mental state in tact. I honestly still feel bad for completely bailing on her the way I did, but I realize that she was beyond my abilities to help. I mean seriously, she was messed up to a degree I didn't even think actually existed, and she refused all attempts to get her professional help (she was terrified of being institutionalized) so I was kind of stuck.
For the most part though the way we met doesn't actually have a lot of impact on the story; this could have almost as easily have happened if we met in person. Except that I learned part way through my dealings with her that I wasn't the first guy she had contacted like that through the site; she was kind of using it to "prey on" naive guys like myself. Though "prey on" makes it sound more malignant than it was. So I guess the moral is just be careful what you get yourself into, since online profiles can hide a lot of warning signs you'd normally notice right away.
Honestly this experience didn't make me think badly of online dating despite what you'd think. It was my own doing, and honestly I saw at least some of what I was getting myself into. I just overestimated my ability to handle it. I see a lot of potential for it if you put more effort into it than I did (I think I used a webcam picture for my profile, so it's hardly a surprise she was the only one I got). It's a way to meet people when it'd be difficult otherwise, nothing wrong with that. Just have to take some extra precautions since you can't confirm some facts as easily over the internet as you can in person.
For the most part though the way we met doesn't actually have a lot of impact on the story; this could have almost as easily have happened if we met in person. Except that I learned part way through my dealings with her that I wasn't the first guy she had contacted like that through the site; she was kind of using it to "prey on" naive guys like myself. Though "prey on" makes it sound more malignant than it was. So I guess the moral is just be careful what you get yourself into, since online profiles can hide a lot of warning signs you'd normally notice right away.
Honestly this experience didn't make me think badly of online dating despite what you'd think. It was my own doing, and honestly I saw at least some of what I was getting myself into. I just overestimated my ability to handle it. I see a lot of potential for it if you put more effort into it than I did (I think I used a webcam picture for my profile, so it's hardly a surprise she was the only one I got). It's a way to meet people when it'd be difficult otherwise, nothing wrong with that. Just have to take some extra precautions since you can't confirm some facts as easily over the internet as you can in person.
that's an impressive amount of time to pretend to be a woman for
I think the social stigma of online dating is getting kind of outdated (though perhaps still very dangerous). Really the only benefit you get from meeting someone offline as opposed to online is that you are assured of their physical appearance. They can still lie about any number of factors just as easily as they could online. I suppose the point is you should be careful both on and off the net.
I myself have had a number of online relationships in the past, but I find they tended to fall through quickly as concerns about having the finances to meet and such became too much of a problem. My current relationship did start online, but I knew the person from back in School and the train was a direct line about 80 miles up the country.
We're now moved in together and set to marry on the easter weekend of 2016. Hooray!
I myself have had a number of online relationships in the past, but I find they tended to fall through quickly as concerns about having the finances to meet and such became too much of a problem. My current relationship did start online, but I knew the person from back in School and the train was a direct line about 80 miles up the country.
We're now moved in together and set to marry on the easter weekend of 2016. Hooray!
Some people just don't like to reject others or to disappoint. I'm one of those guys who walks away whenever someone embarrasses himself on TV, so yeah...I also want something meaningful not just pop and drop.
The most two significant encounters I had was a girl on FB who clearly just wanted to have sex so I made an excuse about not being to skype (she was good looking so it was a hard decision) and another on PS where I chatted with a nice lady and we had lots in common but because I don't know what she looks like I and was in a relationship at the time so...I guess I missed that one.
I did find a profile of someone looking for a long term relationship and lots in common, so I might give that a try if what I have going on right now doesn't work out.
The most two significant encounters I had was a girl on FB who clearly just wanted to have sex so I made an excuse about not being to skype (she was good looking so it was a hard decision) and another on PS where I chatted with a nice lady and we had lots in common but because I don't know what she looks like I and was in a relationship at the time so...I guess I missed that one.
I did find a profile of someone looking for a long term relationship and lots in common, so I might give that a try if what I have going on right now doesn't work out.
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I never used it myself, but two people very close to me did.
My wife used several dating sites for a while before she met me, and she tells me she never found anything meaningful and ended up going on many failed dates and was contacted by several "creepers".
On the flip side, my sister just married a guy in December 2013 whom she had met through online dating, and he's pretty much perfect for her.
I guess the success of online dating is somewhat dependent on the personality of the people involved. Some people are more inclined to adapt to a situation like that, whereas others need the more traditional, personal meeting and interaction to be comfortable with a relationship. Definitely interesting stuff!
My wife used several dating sites for a while before she met me, and she tells me she never found anything meaningful and ended up going on many failed dates and was contacted by several "creepers".
On the flip side, my sister just married a guy in December 2013 whom she had met through online dating, and he's pretty much perfect for her.
I guess the success of online dating is somewhat dependent on the personality of the people involved. Some people are more inclined to adapt to a situation like that, whereas others need the more traditional, personal meeting and interaction to be comfortable with a relationship. Definitely interesting stuff!
Personally it's quite an interesting take on how to form a relationship. As of right now I'm with a girl that I met online through a dating app and it's been great. There's just over 200 km of distance between us that makes seeing each other a pain sometimes. However the positives greatly outweigh the negatives.
Online relationships are different in many ways compared to the conventional methods of dating. I'm going to be talking about only one though; in online relationship you get to know the person better. My current girlfriend and I essentially knew everything about each other before we met for the first time. This is because we weren't going to parties, getting drunk and banging on the first date. We started by facetiming each other and it was great! Since the distance made us get to know each other better before we jumped into anything too serious before we were ready. This made our relationship better and we connect on a deeper level.
The point in trying to get across is this, you spend more time talking on skype or whatever actually getting to know each other. It's different then normal relationships in a completely positive manner. Without knowing that a connection exists what's the point? Online dating gives people that chance to connect on a deeper level. To know if the person is someone they actually want to be with and not a fling that will last only one night.
Personally I find online relationships better in this regard. There's nothing better then knowing your person understands you and you understand them.
Online relationships are different in many ways compared to the conventional methods of dating. I'm going to be talking about only one though; in online relationship you get to know the person better. My current girlfriend and I essentially knew everything about each other before we met for the first time. This is because we weren't going to parties, getting drunk and banging on the first date. We started by facetiming each other and it was great! Since the distance made us get to know each other better before we jumped into anything too serious before we were ready. This made our relationship better and we connect on a deeper level.
The point in trying to get across is this, you spend more time talking on skype or whatever actually getting to know each other. It's different then normal relationships in a completely positive manner. Without knowing that a connection exists what's the point? Online dating gives people that chance to connect on a deeper level. To know if the person is someone they actually want to be with and not a fling that will last only one night.
Personally I find online relationships better in this regard. There's nothing better then knowing your person understands you and you understand them.
Isn't that the whole point of dating? To get to know the person better? I don't see how talking online is any better in that regard. You just did all the things you would do on a date through a computer screen. At that point it's just personal preference. Since I'm someone who doesn't like staring at a screen or my phone all day, I prefer face to face.
It's not like just because you're talking through facetime or text you're connecting on an even deeper level then face to face. Honestly this is the first time I've ever heard anyone say that lol. What can be more personal then actually being able to see and feel the actual person?
I agree with most of this, but you're failing to address the physical side of a relationship. As much as we'd love it not to be true, physical attraction is an important factor in the success of a relationship. Obviously a deep connection and communication are the most important part, but they are also not the whole puzzle. Now, it is possible to become attracted to someone physically over time with heavy influence from a great emotional connection, but it still needs to be there eventually. Facetime/Skype/other services that allow you to see the person even though communicating at a distance can assist here, but it's still important. Pure online relationships do not even have this, and I think can only take you so far before personal interaction is necessary
Also, you are describing online relationships as if they are the only form in which you get to know someone, and this is simply not true. Yes, many in-person relationships are largely physical and place too much emphasis on sex, but there are plenty of others (would even dare say the majority) where a couple achieves a deep personal connection and communicates perfectly well whilst still being intimate physically. My wife and I are a good example of this, as we became intimate early in our relationship but were still able to communicate effectively and connect emotionally.
I'm not saying you're wrong in how you describe the benefits of online dating, but I feel it's not accurate to imply they are "better" than in person dating. Each type of dating has its own set of advantages and challenges, and in order for either to succeed the couple needs to put in the required work.
If you want to know my opinion I can tell you that one of the best place to meet woman is dating site. I joined Mariya-club.com. and never regret about my decision. I found everything iv been looking for. Friend lover and much more. I heard that Slavic women are very beautiful but I couldn’t even imagine how much. If you dreaming to create strong family like I did its exactly what you need.
Online dating has been hit and miss. A couple interesting people, a lot of duds.
In general I find that people are even more particular about looks and vanity with online dating than in-person because, well, that's really all they have to go on. Which is ironic given how easy it is to just use a fake photo (granted, you eventually get caught).
In general I find that people are even more particular about looks and vanity with online dating than in-person because, well, that's really all they have to go on. Which is ironic given how easy it is to just use a fake photo (granted, you eventually get caught).