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A Scientific Poll

Discussion in 'Congregation of the Masses' started by Zacchaeus, Nov 13, 2012.

?

Fold or ball up?

  1. Fold

    52 vote(s)
    52.0%
  2. Ball up

    48 vote(s)
    48.0%
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  1. Zacchaeus

    Zacchaeus
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    I have a burning question for you Smogonites, (and it's not because of hemorrhoids,) when you go to wipe, do you ball the toilet paper up or do you fold it neatly?
  2. moi

    moi

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    Where's the option for shaping it based on your own personal body? Sometimes the ball just doesn't work for everyone.
  3. cookie

    cookie Administrator
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    who the fuck balls up their toilet paper like some mental handicap
  4. Woodchuck

    Woodchuck i am woodchuck
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    maybe some people enjoy the sensation
    i bet there are some people you know of who secretly ball up my toilet paper!
  5. Zacchaeus

    Zacchaeus
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    This is how I've always thought of it. As long as I can remember in life, I've always folded specific numbers of squares, (sometimes more squares if its a cheap brand,) it seems more efficient that way
  6. Woodchuck

    Woodchuck i am woodchuck
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    *their

    anyway perhaps a more scientific poll would be of the number of squares that you use?
  7. Princess Bubblegum

    Princess Bubblegum

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    wait why is it weird not to waste your time folding something you are wiping your ass with
  8. Pernicious

    Pernicious

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    ^absolutely agreed, one could similarly say in the same vein that neatly folding something as utilitarian as toilet paper is symptomatic of mental issues

    i ball it up. it's poop. you're touching the inside and outside of your butt. let's not get too technical about this guys.
  9. Renosaur

    Renosaur

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    also what about standing up / sitting(or squatting) down wiping?
  10. Jebus McAzn

    Jebus McAzn

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    i'd like to see the results segregated by gender
  11. Shiny Mew2

    Shiny Mew2

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    how the fuck does balling it up work

    do you shove it in your ass or something.
  12. ala

    ala
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    ball up because i'm not autistic
  13. Zacchaeus

    Zacchaeus
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    It uses significantly less if you fold it so you're really saving money in the long run which leads me to believe that you're just not as financially concerned if you ball it up

    Also one of my friends just informed me that some people wrap the paper directly around the hand and wipe straight like that, that counts as folding.

    As far as the people I asked in person:
    3 folding 2 balling it up
  14. Texas Cloverleaf

    Texas Cloverleaf meh
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  15. some hero

    some hero

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    It's probably weird but i wash
  16. gookie

    gookie Adominnustrata
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    i use to ball when i was younger, but it used way too much toilet paper and considering i shit at least once a day this was uneconomical

    i am now a folder
  17. Woodchuck

    Woodchuck i am woodchuck
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    edit: i found this psa somewhere
    [​IMG]
    may its message reach you in time
  18. alkinesthetase

    alkinesthetase <@dtc> every day with alk is a bad day
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    i cannot be assed to fold it up so yes i'm a baller. i'm sorry trees but you were made into toilet paper specifically so that you would be in contact with my ass, you might as well bring as many of your buddies with you as possible
  19. capefeather

    capefeather YOU CAN'T STOP ROB
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    you know guys, there are ways to fold toilet paper quickly
  20. Pernicious

    Pernicious

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    another great response from the balling up camp, this time by ala



    "not financially concerned" lol...that is bar non the most ridiculous fucking thing i have heard all day, even if it's true...i refuse to be painted as some kind of wasteful aristocrat who lavishly stuffs reams of silken toilet paper into his asshole. maybe you are saving 15 dollars, but you are losing your essential humanity by doing something so anal

    also the folding around the hand thing is just fucking insane, people who do that should seriously be locked up in an actual mental asylum. im not kidding; i assure you that if you were to poll the nation's serial killers over 60% of them would admit to rolling their toilet paper around their own hands. proof from wikipedia:

    [​IMG]

    I'm also going to say that I think most of you in the folding camp have this idea of ballers just using ridiculous fucking gobs of toilet paper...at least for me, when I say I ball it up, I'm not making James's giant peach here, just a small amorphous blob

    edit: i'll also accept the post below as a reasonable way to wipe your own ass'

    edit2: fuck yeah majority
  21. Lord Jesseus

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    So apparently both sides are indicative of mental conditions

    Personally I just grab some toilet paper and wipe my ass without really thinking about it, maybe its closer to a ball, maybe its closer to a fold, who knows?
    But like seriously who gives a fuck
  22. gookie

    gookie Adominnustrata
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    pernicious you are going crazy on this topic
  23. Pernicious

    Pernicious

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    if anyone folds their paper feel free to challenge me to a duel

    1-917-653-2145 let's go
  24. symphonyx64

    symphonyx64 Private messages are the best way to reach me
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    This is a ridiculous question.

    You want to know what I do? Get paper, wipe, and flush. I do not question the geometry of my ass-wiping.
  25. Pwnemon

    Pwnemon judges silently
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    lol pernicious going hardcore

    i fold because that way there's a wider surface between butt and hand, and if i don't feel like i got it all the first time i can go back for seconds without needing to rip more toilet paper

    4 squares at home where we have charmin ultra-awesome, but 8 squares in public restrooms where four squares means my fingers come away brown

    im not ocd what are you talking about
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