So I was on my way home today from work, and traffic was slow as usual (doesn't bother me). There's a merge lane on my right with a line of cars, so to be polite I leave a space to let one guy in. He goes, but the douche behind him feels it necessary to cram himself up the other guy's ass so he can muscle his way in too.
IF I HAD WANTED TO LET YOU IN I WOULD HAVE LEFT ENOUGH SPACE FOR TWO CARS YOU COCK.
This pissed me off and I wasn't even there.
Once I was driving in my shitty hand-me-down car, and there was a bus in front of me and some d-bag in the lane to my left.
There were train tracks ahead so I knew the bus was going to stop and sped up to make sure I was nice and far ahead of the guy in the left lane, out of effing courtesy to make sure I didn't make him brake when I switched lanes. When I was a good forty or fifty feet in front of him, I put on my turn signal to switch lanes.
I swear to god he pushed his pedal to the medal and spanned the gap between us at like 90, JUST to make sure I couldn't switch lanes. Because of that I had to slam my brakes and almost demolished my car and myself into the back of the bus (which had stopped at the tracks, obv) because I was speeding to make sure that DIDN'T HAPPEN.
Now granted, this was a completely retarded driving-to-school-early bit of broken-driving-logic on my part, but really? Like, would it have just made that guy's day if I'd died? I understood dbags before him, but never dbags that legitimately wanted someone to be maimed.
To this day it blows my mind.