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Post your searing hot takes
- Thread starter Yung Dramps
- Start date
holy fuck we actually managed to shit out 100 pages' worth of lukewarm-at-best takes. impressive
what was everyone's favourite moment from this thread? mine was this:
The fact that you acknowledged this as your favorite part of the thread immediately after acknowledging this thread was full of lukewarm takes in the previous post implies that I succeeded in doing exactly what I was supposed to (posting a searing hot take)
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go back to basking in my superiority complex that came from predicting introverts around the world would miss the pandemic once it passed
yeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuup
faint do you get any royalties for this?
alright time to immortalize myself on this thread
Hotline Miami 2's gameplay is better than that of the first game
"oh but the enemies snipe you from anywhere" yeah and then you go back up couple of seconds later, having more knowledge of the level and seeing more options to solve the level. It's a test of patience. If you stay calm throughout it all, you get the flow of the game and aren't deterred by the trial and error nature of the levels. The enemy AI is questionable, but their reaction to seeing your character is predictable and that alone makes the massive amount of windows a net positive to the gameplay. The original game is difficult by itself, but easy compared to the second, you can rambo through the vast majority of the game without issues, whilst the second requires you to work strategically but also as fast as possible
The critique against HM2 isn't even "I've got skill issues", it's rather "I am impatient"
The only level that doesn't apply to is the extra level, Ruins. Man. That level is really, absolutely, not designed with Evan in mind. It's fine if you decide to go berserk mode by the last room, but if you don't want that, it's just a very frustrating mess
Also, bro just let the games be. The two games are a wonderful narrative, we don't need a third game, not everything needs to be sequelized non-stop
Hotline Miami 2's gameplay is better than that of the first game
"oh but the enemies snipe you from anywhere" yeah and then you go back up couple of seconds later, having more knowledge of the level and seeing more options to solve the level. It's a test of patience. If you stay calm throughout it all, you get the flow of the game and aren't deterred by the trial and error nature of the levels. The enemy AI is questionable, but their reaction to seeing your character is predictable and that alone makes the massive amount of windows a net positive to the gameplay. The original game is difficult by itself, but easy compared to the second, you can rambo through the vast majority of the game without issues, whilst the second requires you to work strategically but also as fast as possible
The critique against HM2 isn't even "I've got skill issues", it's rather "I am impatient"
The only level that doesn't apply to is the extra level, Ruins. Man. That level is really, absolutely, not designed with Evan in mind. It's fine if you decide to go berserk mode by the last room, but if you don't want that, it's just a very frustrating mess
Also, bro just let the games be. The two games are a wonderful narrative, we don't need a third game, not everything needs to be sequelized non-stop
My favorite moment was all of my takes.
my favorite moment was the time i encouraged people to crush up smarties into powder and snort them, thus getting high off of them
You already did that
but, you know. This is Wokegoff
Alright, time for another round of me shitting on a game I've never played.
Spookys Jumpscare Mansion is not a good horror game. Now, there are several asterisks to this. First of all, I am only talking about the base game. Endless Mode is really challenging and stressful. Karamari Hospital... well, it shares a lot of the same problem as the base game, but the visual design is really unnerving, and Hanged Man is pretty cool. Doll House poses a decent gameplay challenge, with one of the most genius moments in any game that is so good I won't even spoil it along with everything else. Second of all, I am only critiquing the gameplay. This game nails the setting, monster design, buildup, and music, with the best collection of death screens I've seen (outside of its sequels). That being said, lets list the gameplay experiences of each of the monsters, and see if you can understand why this game is bad at horror.
Specimen 2:Hold W
Specimen 3:Hold W
Specimen 4:Hold W
Specimen 5:Hold W
Specimen 6:Look behind you when he laughs
Specimen 7:Hold W
Old Specimen 8:Hold W
New Specimen 8:Ok, this one is pretty cool, but after you realize what is happening, all you have to do is keep close to it around walls
Specimen 9:TAKE THE DEAD TO TAKE THE DEAD TO TAKE THE DEAD TO TAKE THE DEAD TO
Specimen 10:Escort Mission
Specimen 11:Hold W
Specimen 12:The easiest game of hide and seek ever, then hold W
Specimen 13:Ok this one is actually pretty good. Technically, you could just camp until your HP is recovered, but at that point, I have to ask you why you are taking fun out of the games you play. Do you use cheats to give yourself diamonds in Minecraft? Do you look up spoilers for shows you watch? Do you play Basketball without an opposing team?
Specimen 9 (again):I don't think I've ever seen anyone get hit by this boss
As you can see, this game is very easy, and that is bad when you want people to be scared. This game nails every other aspect, but its really bad when the least scary part of your game is the actual chase.
Spookys Jumpscare Mansion is not a good horror game. Now, there are several asterisks to this. First of all, I am only talking about the base game. Endless Mode is really challenging and stressful. Karamari Hospital... well, it shares a lot of the same problem as the base game, but the visual design is really unnerving, and Hanged Man is pretty cool. Doll House poses a decent gameplay challenge, with one of the most genius moments in any game that is so good I won't even spoil it along with everything else. Second of all, I am only critiquing the gameplay. This game nails the setting, monster design, buildup, and music, with the best collection of death screens I've seen (outside of its sequels). That being said, lets list the gameplay experiences of each of the monsters, and see if you can understand why this game is bad at horror.
Specimen 2:Hold W
Specimen 3:Hold W
Specimen 4:Hold W
Specimen 5:Hold W
Specimen 6:Look behind you when he laughs
Specimen 7:Hold W
Old Specimen 8:Hold W
New Specimen 8:Ok, this one is pretty cool, but after you realize what is happening, all you have to do is keep close to it around walls
Specimen 9:TAKE THE DEAD TO TAKE THE DEAD TO TAKE THE DEAD TO TAKE THE DEAD TO
Specimen 10:Escort Mission
Specimen 11:Hold W
Specimen 12:The easiest game of hide and seek ever, then hold W
Specimen 13:Ok this one is actually pretty good. Technically, you could just camp until your HP is recovered, but at that point, I have to ask you why you are taking fun out of the games you play. Do you use cheats to give yourself diamonds in Minecraft? Do you look up spoilers for shows you watch? Do you play Basketball without an opposing team?
Specimen 9 (again):I don't think I've ever seen anyone get hit by this boss
As you can see, this game is very easy, and that is bad when you want people to be scared. This game nails every other aspect, but its really bad when the least scary part of your game is the actual chase.
I can't believe this thing is my most engaged-with thread on any forum by leaps and bounds. Thanks! No snideness here, I'm genuinely kinda grateful lol.
I gotta hand it to you: It really does pay to be first.
Hot take: The take after this one will be somewhat microwave cold
Hot take: I don't have any hot takes rn
tfw you reposted an old firebot thread
Counterpoint: It didn't even reach 20 pages.
bc they killed firebot a year later tbf! averages out to about 5 pgs/yr less
If I was in that thread's position, I would simply have survived the forum's death. It really is that easy.
smogon is too wise to fall for the internet equivalent of trap laid by a king/despot/executive telling you you can be completely honest with them
D&D is not a good game. It is still a great experience, and the dice roll makes for some really funny moments, but in terms of pure gameplay, the decision to have the deciding factor to literally every action be luck is genuinely one of the worst decisions ever.
I could've just gotten saddled with bad DMs who didn't know how to do engaging combat, my D&D "phase" was in a high school club after all, but it is absolutely a big part of the reason why I lost interest. Immersing myself in a setting built for me and a table of friends, building my own character with a backstory and bouncing off the others? Cool idea! And then we start rolling dice to beat imaginary people up and zzzzzz honk shoo mimimimi.
This isn't a hot take because it aligns with my personal taste.