Emergency Situations

[Aura Guardian]

Finance a trip to the Fountain of Youth.

You can never reach a cake that looks delicious, and is the only food in 1000 miles. What do you do?

 

[HitoriRaven]

Yell " The cake is a lie!" and shoot my portal gun as far as it will go. Rinse and repeat until I get to the food.

You can pick any person in history to slap the hell out of. Who do you pick?

 

[Mike B]

THORNS YOU TARD. THERE WAS A QUESTION IN MINE AAAAAAAAA


first I would slap sara palin, or john mccain.



if everyone in the world had herpes, but sexual contact gave you double herpes, would it be worth it?

 

[(makeup)]

YES :O

You shit your pants at the beginning of school.

 

[NatGeo]

Run to the nurse's office and hide in the bathroom.

You're in theater, and you dress like a girl, and a guy calls you hot.

 

[danmantincan]

Play along and give him the shock of his life when you get to his place.

A guy that you considered a friend has just cock-blocked you.

 

[GMLW]

Brutally murder him.

You're trapped in a cave with hungry tigers and you have steak sauce all over you.

 

[SMZ]

You decide you're the better predator and eat THEM.

You're chained in a basement, and bunch of big buffy dudes are about to rape you.

 

[Gabe]

You decide you're the better predator and eat THEM.

You're chained in a basement, and bunch of big buffy dudes are about to rape you.

Chop off their dicks.


You've just chopped off a bunch of bug dude's dicks and the cops are coming.

 

[chocolate-kipp]

Tell them you were raped. Get FREE MONEY!

Your computer dies. Forever. And you have no other sources of internet (or porn).

 

[HitoriRaven]

Make an incomplete time machine, use it, and go throughout that day over and over again with small changes each repeat until I solve the mystery and fix my computer.

You've just met the devil and he offers you $1000 dollars for you to spend 1 minute in hell.

 

[Aura Guardian]

claim to be Tom Walker, get even richer.

A giant shark is about to eat you whole. What do you do?

 

[SMZ]

Ride it.

You're given the following options (you have to choose one of them, or a suicide bomber blows up the EARTH)
A- Rape your sister, kill your dad.
B- Rape your brother, kill your mom.
C- Taking out your penis, part of your liver, and one kidney.
D- Debate with Deck Knight.

 

[chocolate-kipp]

Going with C, as I don't have a penis :D.

Oh no, your money got stolen!
A.) Get it back from that 7-foot robber who is carrying multiple knives.
B.) Get it back by getting a job at McDonald's.

 

[TsukasaSIGN]

Going with C, as I don't have a penis :D.

Oh no, your money got stolen!
A.) Get it back from that 7-foot robber who is carrying multiple knives.
B.) Get it back by getting a job at McDonald's.

C.) Fuck bitches. Get money.

One day you wake up and are so handsome that everybody wants to make love to you but anybody you have sex with that isn't the same gender as you will die during intercourse. What to do?

 

[NatGeo]

Go for it, but only with suicidal chicks.

There is a lifetime's supply of drugs up for the taking of your preference, and a way to evade the cops, but you will be on the run for the rest of your life.

 

[DDRMaster]

Edit: I shouldn't take so long to post.

Have Spongebob push you out of the way and spin around a few times before smacking into a pole so you're not sexy anymore.

You're trapped on an island with no one around.

 

[doomvendingmachine]

There is a lifetime's supply of drugs up for the taking of your preference, and a way to evade the cops, but you will be on the run for the rest of your life.

You're trapped on an island with no one around.

Can I combine the two unanswered ones? They kinda solve each other.

You are being attacked by a pack of great white sharks

 

[jwoozie]

Swim to land.

You wake up in a room after being drugged to find yourself in a Saw-like situation. There are no windows and the door knob is covered in HIV positive semen. Every part of your body is sliced with tiny paper cuts. There is a pendulum saw swinging closer and closer to you.

 

[doomvendingmachine]

Ask Magic Johnson to open the door for me.

You a trapped in a 3 hour Justin Bieber concert with no way to escape until the show ends. How do you survive?

 

[NeilKosugi]

I brought an air-horn, didn't I?

Someone has built a room around you. The room has no doors or windows, just English teachers. How do you get out?

 

[DDRMaster]

I brought an air-horn, didn't I?

Someone has built a room around you. The room has no doors or windows, just English teachers. How do you get out?

Tell them you're going to reenact And Then There Were None and they'll panic and eventually claw their way out of the room.

You accidentally call your girlfriend the wrong name during sex.

 

[NatGeo]

Say that's your synonym for "baby" from now on.

There is a swarm of bees, and a bear is also chasing you, for you are covered in honey.

 

[Xav]

C.)One day you wake up and are so handsome that everybody wants to make love to you but anybody you have sex with that isn't the same gender as you will die during intercourse. What to do?

I really shouldn't reply this late but hey, become a necrophiliac.

There is a swarm of bees, and a bear is also chasing you, for you are covered in honey.

Kill the bear and eat its liver.

You're about to be hit by a car.

 

[Iggdrasil]

Jump on the windscreen to give them a lovely surprise.

A meteor will hit the Earth in 1 hour... What do you do?