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Social Neurodiversity

NaboGaming said:
okay! i was just worried i was like, "not autistic enough" or something, because my interests seem to fade in and out! sometimes im in the mood for pokemon, sometimes for terraria, etc!
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I get that this was most likely just a figure of speech, but the fact of the matter is, we all have our own neurodevelopmental background. Autism isn't something that is measured on a meter. It's referred to as a spectrum disorder for a reason- there's no one specific metric that determines "Oh, this kid is more autistic than that kid". The same principle goes for adults, even. Across the world, we're starting to see a gradual increase in neurodiverse employment not because of who we are or what we're labelled as, so much as what we bring to the table as potential workers or employees. Despite what the mainstream media may have you believe, an increasing number of employers, particularly in Western economies,

I'd like to touch on a few other neurodevelopmental diagnoses while I'm still thinking about this fresh. Increased diagnostic rates bring to question the validity of commonly accepted diagnosis names, at least to me. Let's think of ADHD, for example. The official acronym is "Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder", but if I'm being completely honest with our neurotypical peers, do the actions of an increasing proportion of the population with ADHD warrant their labelling as a group that simply struggles to stay focused? ADHD exists on a wider array of thoughts and feelings that serve as both a benefit and a detriment to individuals. Most people that might have ADHD that I've met (it's not like I'm going to just pull them aside and ask) are very nice people who want the best for themselves and others.
 
bdt2002 said:
I get that this was most likely just a figure of speech, but the fact of the matter is, we all have our own neurodevelopmental background. Autism isn't something that is measured on a meter. It's referred to as a spectrum disorder for a reason- there's no one specific metric that determines "Oh, this kid is more autistic than that kid". The same principle goes for adults, even. Across the world, we're starting to see a gradual increase in neurodiverse employment not because of who we are or what we're labelled as, so much as what we bring to the table as potential workers or employees. Despite what the mainstream media may have you believe, an increasing number of employers, particularly in Western economies,

I'd like to touch on a few other neurodevelopmental diagnoses while I'm still thinking about this fresh. Increased diagnostic rates bring to question the validity of commonly accepted diagnosis names, at least to me. Let's think of ADHD, for example. The official acronym is "Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder", but if I'm being completely honest with our neurotypical peers, do the actions of an increasing proportion of the population with ADHD warrant their labelling as a group that simply struggles to stay focused? ADHD exists on a wider array of thoughts and feelings that serve as both a benefit and a detriment to individuals. Most people that might have ADHD that I've met (it's not like I'm going to just pull them aside and ask) are very nice people who want the best for themselves and others.
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very well said! and you were right the first time, i am a minor! and i know its not quantifiable like that, but sometimes i feel invalid and like, im not able to call myself autistic (even though, i very much am able, and should, because i am autistic.)
 
NaboGaming said:
very well said! and you were right the first time, i am a minor! and i know its not quantifiable like that, but sometimes i feel invalid and like, im not able to call myself autistic (even though, i very much am able, and should, because i am autistic.)
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Autism is probably the LEAST quantifiable thing in this world, which is funny considering a symptom of our soup is only seeing stuff in quantifiable measures.
 
Recently read the book "Pretending to be Normal" by Liane Holliday. Reading a first hand autobiographical account of someone else who also only received their AS diagnosis later in life has been a wonderful, deeply relatable and insightful experience. Strongly recommend the read to anyone with AS or even just anyone looking to understand it better. It was so relieving and pleasant and calming to finally read about human experiences and states of mind that I can connect to so well, I sometimes have a hard time doing so with content by and for NTs.
(i guess one warning the book is pretty old and mentions that one nazi guy's name a lot, maybe don't pick it up if that bothers you)

oh yeah also while I'm here. looking for bendy things to hold in my hands, to help with focus and stuff. not sure exactly which objects to go for. if anyone has recommendations I'm all ears
 
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Amaranth said:
oh yeah also while I'm here. looking for bendy things to hold in my hands, to help with focus and stuff. not sure exactly which objects to go for. if anyone has recommendations I'm all ears
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maybe not quite what you're looking for but are you familiar with gumby? i had one of these as a kid and i remember it had a good "bending" quality if that makes sense lol. wish i still had him to fidget with

TS-4511_1gumbybendable_1200x1200.jpg
 
heiloh, I'm definitely late, but hi.

ADHD gal here, though it's very unpredictable which slightly aggravates me. What's the point of having this hyperfocus-creativity-thing if I can't slightly lean it toward my favor?
Used to be on meds in like, first to fifth grade because back then it was a major problem. To the school, anyway, I was a devious aggressive goblin. :P

Maybe the meds had long-term effects that suppressed the majority of it.
(Am I even allowed here at that point?)
 
Candelia said:
heiloh, I'm definitely late, but hi.

ADHD gal here, though it's very unpredictable which slightly aggravates me. What's the point of having this hyperfocus-creativity-thing if I can't slightly lean it toward my favor?
Used to be on meds in like, first to fifth grade because back then it was a major problem. To the school, anyway, I was a devious aggressive goblin. :P

Maybe the meds had long-term effects that suppressed the majority of it.
(Am I even allowed here at that point?)
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I’m going to try and be careful with how I word what I’m about to say, since I don’t want anyone (especially yourself) to get the wrong idea. I’ve done the research on how skewed neurodivergent research is towards us guys, and likely due to my unfortunate lack of interactions with both sides, I can’t help but find neurodiversity in girls to be an incredibly fascinating discussion topic. Going forward, I actually wanted to focus more of my research for my (hopeful) future career on why all of the so-called “facts” about diagnoses like ADHD are so heavily biased by the male demographic.

In much more simple words, I think what I’m trying to say here is that I wish there was more readily available information about people in your shoes. Autism spectrum disorders and OCD are the two diagnoses I have the most understanding of, but there’s definitely far more than just those, and I really feel like we could help out each other here. I get to learn more about the neurodivergent population, and you would have another user to talk to if you had any questions.

Nice to meet you, and like I said, don’t be afraid to ask me any questions you might have. I’m sorry this post might seem… a bit odd, but you can blame the lack of research if you want.

Off-topic edit: Can any of you do me a favor? I want someone to either interact with this comment or reply to it. I’m just trying to see if there might be something wrong with my notifications. Thanks.
 
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bdt2002 said:
I’m going to try and be careful with how I word what I’m about to say, since I don’t want anyone (especially yourself) to get the wrong idea. I’ve done the research on how skewed neurodivergent research is towards us guys, and likely due to my unfortunate lack of interactions with both sides, I can’t help but find neurodiversity in girls to be an incredibly fascinating discussion topic. Going forward, I actually wanted to focus more of my research for my (hopeful) future career on why all of the so-called “facts” about diagnoses like ADHD are so heavily biased by the male demographic.

In much more simple words, I think what I’m trying to say here is that I wish there was more readily available information about people in your shoes. Autism spectrum disorders and OCD are the two diagnoses I have the most understanding of, but there’s definitely far more than just those, and I really feel like we could help out each other here. I get to learn more about the neurodivergent population, and you would have another user to talk to if you had any questions.

Nice to meet you, and like I said, don’t be afraid to ask me any questions you might have. I’m sorry this post might seem… a bit odd, but you can blame the lack of research if you want.

Off-topic edit: Can any of you do me a favor? I want someone to either interact with this comment or reply to it. I’m just trying to see if there might be something wrong with my notifications. Thanks.
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Favor done, and, why would I blame you?

Plus, if it helps with your research, I am (unfortunately) genetically male.
Surpriiiiiiiise? I get a lil flag, I suppose.
 
Candelia said:
Favor done, and, why would I blame you?

Plus, if it helps with your research, I am (unfortunately) genetically male.
Surpriiiiiiiise? I get a lil flag, I suppose.
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Thanks for the help. More importantly, I don’t want to judge you off of who you are genetically. If you want to identify as one or the other, you likely have a reason for doing so, and it’s my responsibility to respect whatever that reason is.
 
It was very interesting to read all of your experiences in the thread. Thanks for sharing.

I got diagnosed with ADHD last June, and getting diagnosed has been legit one of the best things to ever happen to me. I was deadass browsing youtube and found a video about ADHD and I realized how little I knew about the condition, and how much the description lined up with my experiences. I'm not one to fall into the trap of self-diagnosis based on vague symptoms, but I figured I'd go see a psych and see if I actually have it.

It was crazy how much of my life it explained:
- I lose EVERYTHING. For, like, the entirety of middle/high school, I'd have to borrow a writing utensil every other day because I'd lose the one I used the previous day. I felt super bad having to ask people all the time.
- I'd randomly forget extremely important things because my brain just goes on autopilot focusing on something I perceive to be more interesting. More than once, I've exited my car with the keys in the ignition switch with the engine running, only to realize 15 minutes later while I'm in my apartment that I don't have my keys
- I was a very good student, but I'd randomly end up with Bs instead of As because I'd forget a massive project or 5 homework assignments. It pissed me off so much, since I knew most of the material, but just....didn't realize I had homework to do. I'm currently doing a PhD, and my advisor got really mad at me because I wasn't getting work done on time. It made me so angry because I felt like I was working really hard to get stuff done, but it just...wasn't happening.
- I can hyperfixate on things that interest me, but things that bore me are PAINFUL. Like, waiting in line without something to do is almost torture. But then in high school I'd play tennis for like 6 hours and not even think about anything else going on in my life. Or I'll plop down in front of my PC and play 5 games of league in a row without breaking a sweat.
- Long-term projects are REALLY hard to get done. Breaking it into the most simple components is basically the only way I can do them, but most of the time I just get paralyzed and end up not doing anything.

I really wish I had gotten it checked out before I had lived 26 years of my life, but I'm glad I got it done in the end. I did well in school and didn't really have too many other glaring issues throughout my life, so I probably learned some really good coping mechanisms, but damn life would've been easier had I known earlier lmao. The amount of times I convinced myself I was "lazy" and ended up spiraling into an emotional mess was way too high. I won't say ADHD is a "superpower" - it's definitely been more debilitating than not - but at the very least I've found better ways to use the things I'm good at. I'm great at multitasking and making connections between complex thoughts, but terrible at organization, so it's important for me to focus on emphasizing my strengths and not beating myself up over my weaknesses, but finding ways to work around them.

I'm currently on Adderall and it's crazy how much it improves my ability to work on what I WANT to do, which is strangely the part of ADHD that's the most painful - everyone has things they don't want to do, but when you can't even do the things you want to, it's awful. Another strategy that has helped is just having a rough schedule of what I want to do for the day. Even simple things like errands get worked in, instead of saying "I'll get to it when I get to it". I'm not perfect, but my life is a lot better and, more importantly, EASIER.

If you think any of these experiences (or any other that you hear about, there are a lot of good explanations of the disorder on youtube) line up with yours, I'd highly recommend getting it checked out. Thanks for reading.
 
I'm not sure how much longer I was going to be able to avoid talking about this out of nervousness, but I guess it can't be helped. I was reminded of this upon replying to someone else's post just now elsewhere on the forums. I'm going to try and keep this brief if I can, which knowing me means this post could end up pretty long. What exactly is my question, you might wonder?

How can any of us tell if it's time for us to start being more social in the hopes of (eventually) forming a successful relationship? Despite my age, I have next to no interest in social media or texting, outside of the YouTube comment section and here on Smogon I suppose. The problem with being in my early 20s is that pretty much everyone at or near my age has at least been in a relationship before. And then there's me, who can count on one hand the amount of times I've ever had feelings for anyone period. You wanna know how many times? Only two. And one of those cases was because of an inside joke on our junior high soccer team involving a different school, so there went that idea.

I'm okay with waiting for whenever the right time may be. I'm okay with not having all the answers. But the one thing I just cannot handle is looking around and public and seeing all of my neurotypical peers in happy, loving relationships. My friends, my family, people at church, people at school, literally anywhere I go, I see people together like this. This isn't a matter of "I wish none of you were happy", because believe me, I love seeing other people happy like that. This is a matter of "will I ever be able to have something like this?".

What makes this even more complicated is that it's not even a relationship I technically want. I just want to have people to look after in my life. Being the youngest of three may sound like it has its perks, and while that may be true, no one else I've ever lived with is neurodiverse, and most of my friends from both high school and college have younger siblings too, while I'm stuck with only older ones. I suppose I can celebrate that I'll technically have my own nephew to look after here in four months, and while I'm extremely happy for my brother and his girlfriend's relationship being at its highest point ever, it does admittedly make me a bit jealous that my brother can have something like that and I may never have that chance.

All I've ever wanted is to return the favor. I've spent the first 20 years of my life being the one who's always receiving help and watching others be able to do things that I simply can't. What's so bad about the autistic kid (myself) wanting to be the same kind of help for other people (including that nephew once he's born) that my family and friends were for me. And when I'm reminded of the one chance I had in 2021 to talk to a friend more and maybe see where it goes. I'm just left here heartbroken, writing what's pretty much an essay at this point on a freaking social forum.

How can I tell if or when I have feelings for someone? How could I ever even try to assume if someone might have feelings for me in a similar way? Is this even a neurodiversity problem, or is it just a me problem? I've heard time and time again that many of us struggle to understand relationships, which is why I wanted to talk about this here. In conclusion, while I'm still okay with being patient, I'm not sure how much longer I can go without this impacting my daily routine and my mental health. Sorry this post was so long, and if you read this whole thing, that means a lot.
 
Recently diagnosed with high functioning autism. My therapist said me and Elon Musk are quite similar on that regard but Musk is objectively more apparent compared to me.

My issue regarding such condition is there is a random chance I do not understand facial expressions of others and that I may do or say something that someone may take 'offense' to by accident which certainly had killed off a lot of friendships and relationships that didn't had to end like that way. Hence for me literally any interactions with new people feels like trying to defuse a ticking time bomb and any wrong move can explode and end the relationship.

On the positive note however I realised this can also secretly be a blessing as much as it is a curse. I simply learnt when someone may say something that is 'offensive' which is certainly subjective depending on the context, 9 times out of 10 I got used to shrugging it off because I understand that others I interact with are still only human and they may suffer the exact same condition that I am.

Two wrongs don't make a right after all. Also be the change you want to see this world go through starting with oneself
 
bdt2002 said:
I'm not sure how much longer I was going to be able to avoid talking about this out of nervousness, but I guess it can't be helped. I was reminded of this upon replying to someone else's post just now elsewhere on the forums. I'm going to try and keep this brief if I can, which knowing me means this post could end up pretty long. What exactly is my question, you might wonder?

How can any of us tell if it's time for us to start being more social in the hopes of (eventually) forming a successful relationship? Despite my age, I have next to no interest in social media or texting, outside of the YouTube comment section and here on Smogon I suppose. The problem with being in my early 20s is that pretty much everyone at or near my age has at least been in a relationship before. And then there's me, who can count on one hand the amount of times I've ever had feelings for anyone period. You wanna know how many times? Only two. And one of those cases was because of an inside joke on our junior high soccer team involving a different school, so there went that idea.

I'm okay with waiting for whenever the right time may be. I'm okay with not having all the answers. But the one thing I just cannot handle is looking around and public and seeing all of my neurotypical peers in happy, loving relationships. My friends, my family, people at church, people at school, literally anywhere I go, I see people together like this. This isn't a matter of "I wish none of you were happy", because believe me, I love seeing other people happy like that. This is a matter of "will I ever be able to have something like this?".

What makes this even more complicated is that it's not even a relationship I technically want. I just want to have people to look after in my life. Being the youngest of three may sound like it has its perks, and while that may be true, no one else I've ever lived with is neurodiverse, and most of my friends from both high school and college have younger siblings too, while I'm stuck with only older ones. I suppose I can celebrate that I'll technically have my own nephew to look after here in four months, and while I'm extremely happy for my brother and his girlfriend's relationship being at its highest point ever, it does admittedly make me a bit jealous that my brother can have something like that and I may never have that chance.

All I've ever wanted is to return the favor. I've spent the first 20 years of my life being the one who's always receiving help and watching others be able to do things that I simply can't. What's so bad about the autistic kid (myself) wanting to be the same kind of help for other people (including that nephew once he's born) that my family and friends were for me. And when I'm reminded of the one chance I had in 2021 to talk to a friend more and maybe see where it goes. I'm just left here heartbroken, writing what's pretty much an essay at this point on a freaking social forum.

How can I tell if or when I have feelings for someone? How could I ever even try to assume if someone might have feelings for me in a similar way? Is this even a neurodiversity problem, or is it just a me problem? I've heard time and time again that many of us struggle to understand relationships, which is why I wanted to talk about this here. In conclusion, while I'm still okay with being patient, I'm not sure how much longer I can go without this impacting my daily routine and my mental health. Sorry this post was so long, and if you read this whole thing, that means a lot.
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Hey, I think it's nice that you brought up this topic. I think being rejection sensitive is pretty common in the neurodiversity community and the same goes for relationships.

I think for the most part, there isn't really a set time where you should be hoping for your first romantic relationship. In my opinion, a more healthy mindset is probably just viewing romantic relationships as just another form of relationship, and platonic relationships exist too. A lot of romantic relationships stem from friends that happened to develop feelings for each other. As for being more social part, I think you could try and focus on just doing that without the aspect of romantic relationships. The beautiful things about a lot of romantic relationships is that a lot of them happen without trying for it. The important thing is not trying to force things. After a while, the spark fades a bit and you need to have genuine interest in the person in order to show up for them every day and it's about the connection. Alongside making new friends, being more generally social and friendly will help bring in new possible romantic partners too.

I think it's also important to be comfortable when not in a relationship. If you want people to look after then there are close friends you can maintain a good connection to where you look after each other. Romantic relationships are much more intimate than that although it's definitely a component. I don't think there's really a set in stone way to tell if you have feelings for someone, since everyone's way of having feelings are different. My personal way of knowing I have feelings for someone is if I can see them as a long term partner, but this may vary depending on what you’re looking for and what your personality is. But if you have feelings for someone, you can always ask them if they feel the same and whether or not they want to get to know you more as more than a friend. It might seem tough but if they turn you down, then that's fine. Sometimes people just aren't into each other but that doesn't say anything about your attractiveness as a person, people are attracted to different qualities. For example, an introvert might find an extravert annoying because of how loud they are (although there are many introverts that date extraverts!), but that doesn't mean the extravert is inherently unattractive.

In terms of the neurodiversity, from my personal experience as someone who has ADHD is to try and be aware that even though some people might see you as strange, it's good to have a positive self image of yourself as just someone who's different. Everyone is different in many ways and neurodiversity is only one of them. Note that this is an age where many people are dating so it’s not embarrassing to catch feelings for someone else at all, the important thing is taking it well if you get rejected.

I hope this helped but I think it’s good to think long term as for intimate relationships and I’m sure you will figure it out eventually!
 
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a while ago now, i made this post. i mostly forgot about it, but it appeared in my alerts a few months ago. naturally, seeing a post of mine from over six years ago piqued my curiosity, so i decided to read what i had written back then. after reading over it a few times and spending a while intermittently mulling over its contents, i've come to the conclusion that my perception of things back then was really, really bad. i feel the need to acknowledge this.

my attitude as expressed in that post is very problematic. the mere thought that i might be an autistic person clearly shook me to the core back then. now, my dad was an awful human being who went to whatever lengths he could to control my behaviour and that of my immediate family members, and continually suggesting all the things i write about there was just one of them. this, specifically, was something that he did on a regular basis to undermine my confidence in social situations and keep me at home as much as possible. however, the fact that this worked at all, let alone to the extent that it did, is the core problem here. i let the idea that i could be anything other than what i considered "normal" at that time eat away at me for years. i even say almost word-for-word in that post that i considered it a relief when i learned that i could potentially not be neurodiverse. the most egregious part of this post, though, is probably the last paragraph. patent nonsense abounds, such as an expression that "this could all have been extremely bad luck" and lamentations about how i should have been forced to behave a certain way by my parents.

i think it goes without saying that this is an awful and discriminatory way of thinking. i spent so many years of my life pathologising being an autistic person as a stake through the heart of any hope i had at leading a fulfilling existence, which was simply not right. i'm really sorry that this was ever something that ran through my head, and i'm really sorry that this was how i perceived others and neurodiversity in general for so long.
 
Aurora said:
a while ago now, i made this post. i mostly forgot about it, but it appeared in my alerts a few months ago. naturally, seeing a post of mine from over six years ago piqued my curiosity, so i decided to read what i had written back then. after reading over it a few times and spending a while intermittently mulling over its contents, i've come to the conclusion that my perception of things back then was really, really bad. i feel the need to acknowledge this.

my attitude as expressed in that post is very problematic. the mere thought that i might be an autistic person clearly shook me to the core back then. now, my dad was an awful human being who went to whatever lengths he could to control my behaviour and that of my immediate family members, and continually suggesting all the things i write about there was just one of them. this, specifically, was something that he did on a regular basis to undermine my confidence in social situations and keep me at home as much as possible. however, the fact that this worked at all, let alone to the extent that it did, is the core problem here. i let the idea that i could be anything other than what i considered "normal" at that time eat away at me for years. i even say almost word-for-word in that post that i considered it a relief when i learned that i could potentially not be neurodiverse. the most egregious part of this post, though, is probably the last paragraph. patent nonsense abounds, such as an expression that "this could all have been extremely bad luck" and lamentations about how i should have been forced to behave a certain way by my parents.

i think it goes without saying that this is an awful and discriminatory way of thinking. i spent so many years of my life pathologising being an autistic person as a stake through the heart of any hope i had at leading a fulfilling existence, which was simply not right. i'm really sorry that this was ever something that ran through my head, and i'm really sorry that this was how i perceived others and neurodiversity in general for so long.
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You shouldn't beat yourself up for having past gut reactions to your own diagnoses, being emotionally overwhelmed both internally and externally is totally understandable - I am a (somewhat) high-functioning autistic person and also have ADHD + permanent brain damage (frontal and temporal lobes), and for the longest time, I was unwilling to say that I was autistic due to my own internalized biases (quite a few of them baseless) about being on the spectrum. I also had the same reaction internally coming to terms with the fact that I'm bisexual and genderfluid due to my own internalized bias (quite a few of those also baseless). Accepting who you are will usually mean one thing - you're better equipped to research and study aspects of yourself, improving your quality of life. You'll feel like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders because of that self-acceptance, and eventually, you'll be able to utilize some functions of your mind that are unique to your diagnosis.

Many of us have been down that road, even if some don't feel comfortable talking about it, and it's perfectly okay to stumble and learn from the past; the more you learn, the better and brighter your future will be! I hope you're doing well and I hope your life has been improving day by day! You're not a bad person, keep your head up towards tomorrow, you've got this!
 
Something piqued my interest recently about ADHD and neurodiversity in general is the presence of RSD, or rejection sensitive dysphoria in a lot of the people who have it's lives.

RSD is defined as " the extreme emotional sensitivity and pain triggered by the perception that a person has been rejected or criticized by important people in their life. It may also be triggered by a sense of falling short—failing to meet their own high standards or others' expectations." This is a really good article and study about RSD in ADHDers specifically.

RSD coupled with neurodiversity can make daily life very challenging because it makes you feel alone and without a support system at times. Another thing about neurodiverse people is that they tend to gravitate towards one another because we can understand each other due to our similar brains and I feel like it's nice to support each other through RSD.

I would like to bring it up as a formal topic about you guys's experiences with RSD and how you have managed to move past it, deal with it, or are looking to deal with it. Thanks for the responses if you choose to do it!
 
mushamu said:
Something piqued my interest recently about ADHD and neurodiversity in general is the presence of RSD, or rejection sensitive dysphoria in a lot of the people who have it's lives.

RSD is defined as " the extreme emotional sensitivity and pain triggered by the perception that a person has been rejected or criticized by important people in their life. It may also be triggered by a sense of falling short—failing to meet their own high standards or others' expectations." This is a really good article and study about RSD in ADHDers specifically.

RSD coupled with neurodiversity can make daily life very challenging because it makes you feel alone and without a support system at times. Another thing about neurodiverse people is that they tend to gravitate towards one another because we can understand each other due to our similar brains and I feel like it's nice to support each other through RSD.

I would like to bring it up as a formal topic about you guys's experiences with RSD and how you have managed to move past it, deal with it, or are looking to deal with it. Thanks for the responses if you choose to do it!
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Every meeting with my PhD advisor gives me insane anxiety because the criticism hurts so much. I know he does it because he cares, and I've found ways to deal with the anxiety, but holy shit it's still kinda painful. Not sure if I have a "strategy", but I just kind of remind myself that I haven't been kicked out or fired yet so...probably not doing THAT much wrong lmao
 
mushamu said:
Something piqued my interest recently about ADHD and neurodiversity in general is the presence of RSD, or rejection sensitive dysphoria in a lot of the people who have it's lives.

RSD is defined as " the extreme emotional sensitivity and pain triggered by the perception that a person has been rejected or criticized by important people in their life. It may also be triggered by a sense of falling short—failing to meet their own high standards or others' expectations." This is a really good article and study about RSD in ADHDers specifically.

RSD coupled with neurodiversity can make daily life very challenging because it makes you feel alone and without a support system at times. Another thing about neurodiverse people is that they tend to gravitate towards one another because we can understand each other due to our similar brains and I feel like it's nice to support each other through RSD.

I would like to bring it up as a formal topic about you guys's experiences with RSD and how you have managed to move past it, deal with it, or are looking to deal with it. Thanks for the responses if you choose to do it!
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spatula said:
Every meeting with my PhD advisor gives me insane anxiety because the criticism hurts so much. I know he does it because he cares, and I've found ways to deal with the anxiety, but holy shit it's still kinda painful. Not sure if I have a "strategy", but I just kind of remind myself that I haven't been kicked out or fired yet so...probably not doing THAT much wrong lmao
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Rejection-sensitive dysphoria isn’t really something I’ve heard that much about, but it seems interesting to look into. It’s nice that at least some information exists about this, because I don’t really have much experience with anything like this. As an autistic individual, I feel like I take criticism a bit more harsh than the average person, but what I find time and time again is that (most) neurodivergents are willing to be flexible and adaptive with professionals who are willing to put in the time and effort to understand the needs of their clients.

I’ve been busy with school over the past month but I’m done with it now, so I may do some more reading up on RSD in the coming days. For now, I want to learn more about how the ADHD population feels about RSD and how said diagnosis may have further affect on the mental wellness of these neurodiverse individuals.
 
I never knew about this thread. Well, I have found my people: Pokémon fans with weird brains. I'm Samirsin, and I have a really unusual case. Initially, when I had no knowledge about neurodiversity, I believed I had schizophrenia due to experiencing various types of hallucinations throughout the day, mainly auditory ones. However, I was always aware that they were not real. I never found them bothersome since I had been experiencing them for as long as I can remember, and I had grown accustomed to them without any difficulties in my everyday life.

Later on, the hallucinations started occurring more frequently and becoming louder. I was genuinely scared to seek help because, as mentioned earlier, I thought it was schizophrenia, and the associated stigma is truly awful. Many other things happened, and after several months, I finally managed to see a psychiatrist. It turned out to be quite ironic because I went in expecting to learn about my hallucinations but instead received a diagnosis of ADHD, dyslexia, and OCD. Apparently, many things I had considered normal were not. However, the main issue persisted as I had additional experiences, yet no specific diagnosis for my hallucinations.

By that point, I was already on medication, and it worked fantastically for me. So, giving it a name wasn't important anymore. However, I remained somewhat curious to know what it was. Over the years, I visited multiple psychiatrists, but they were all perplexed by my symptoms and couldn't provide a name for my condition. Eventually, a doctor arrived at two possibilities: 1. I am simply more prone to hallucinations than the average person, or 2. It is a rare condition with little to no research. To this day, what I have remains unnamed, and I am okay with that.
 
It’s been a while since I’ve looked back at this thread, and it would seem we have some new people who have discovered this thread exists during my so-called “absence”. I welcome these users into our little community with open arms, and would like to help answer any questions you have as best as I can. I can’t promise I’ll have all the answers, though. :)

In an effort to encourage some discussion to keep this thread alive, I want to leave some discussion questions here for us to ponder. Please note that I’m not asking for anything specific and just want to let you have a chance to enjoy talking to the rest of our community:
  • Have there ever been times when your special interests have helped you through a difficult time related to your diagnos(es)? What lessons did you learn from these?
  • How do you feel your diagnos(es) influence yourself and/or your personality on a daily basis? Are these influences positive or negative?
  • What kinds of things would you want other people to have a better understanding of regarding your diagnos(es) and/or your life situation?
 
bdt2002 said:
It’s been a while since I’ve looked back at this thread, and it would seem we have some new people who have discovered this thread exists during my so-called “absence”. I welcome these users into our little community with open arms, and would like to help answer any questions you have as best as I can. I can’t promise I’ll have all the answers, though. :)

In an effort to encourage some discussion to keep this thread alive, I want to leave some discussion questions here for us to ponder. Please note that I’m not asking for anything specific and just want to let you have a chance to enjoy talking to the rest of our community:
  • Have there ever been times when your special interests have helped you through a difficult time related to your diagnos(es)? What lessons did you learn from these?
  • How do you feel your diagnos(es) influence yourself and/or your personality on a daily basis? Are these influences positive or negative?
  • What kinds of things would you want other people to have a better understanding of regarding your diagnos(es) and/or your life situation?
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i have ocd and i wish people would stop being like oh so you're a neat freak? no! im actually a very messy person! i just have these thoughts that i feel horrible about
 
Today I learned that people with OCD aren't all neat freaks
stupid stereotypes
Even when I try not to I still fall for them
I guess in a similar vein, not all Autistic people are incredibly smart
I, for example, am painfully average at most everything I do
 
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