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The Everything NFL Thread - 2013-2014 Edition

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jrrrrrrr said:
They have been winning for more than a decade because they're coached by the coach of the year. Are you really holding Belichicks past success against him? "You've been so good for so long, you cant possibly be the best this year!" Does not compute.
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yeah he's too good give someone else a chance fuck

it's like making peyton the default mvp every year, not fair man :(
 
DetroitLolcat said:
Yeah, I'm a known troll guys. Obviously, because two weeks ago I said I believed in the Jets offense (outdueled the Falcons' offense), Chicago and Cutler is extremely overrated (two straight blowout losses where Cutler played poorly), and that the Texans were average and would miss the playoffs (Preposterous!). Protip: if my predictions are doing well, don't accuse me of trolling :)

In fact, I'll put my (figurative) money where my mouth is. Here's my predictions for the rest of the 2013 season.

NFC East:
Philadelphia 12-4
Dallas 6-10
NY Giants 4-12
Washington 2-14

This is mostly due to strength of schedule. Philly's got a great home field advantage and a creampuff road schedule, plus they've contended in every game of their tough schedule so far besides @ Denver. 2-3 is deceiving, they could easily be 4-1 right now. If Vick stays healthy, watch out, NFL. Dallas has no defense, and the Giants and Redskins have dug themselves a hole too deep to get out of. Not to mention RG3's reluctance to run.

NFC West:
Seattle 14-2
San Francisco 13-3
Arizona 6-10
St. Louis 2-14

San Francisco's remaining schedule is so easy it's unfair. Expect to see this team vying for the division for the rest of this year, but Seattle'll take it thanks to the best home field advantage in the NFL, the most complete roster in the NFL, and a joke of a road schedule. St. Louis is young and rebuilding, while Carson Palmer is obviously not the answer in Arizona. Arizona is where quarterbacks go to die, you know.

NFC South:
New Orleans 15-1
Carolina 7-9
Atlanta 4-12
Tampa Bay 4-12

The second-worst offense in the league will understand why Mike Glennon is not the answer. Atlanta's injured beyond belief and obviously not very good judging by their 1-4 record. Carolina's a pretty average team, and New Orleans is a Super Bowl contender with a cakewalk of a schedule.

NFC North:

Green Bay 13-3
Detroit 12-4
Chicago 8-8
Minnesota 5-11

I've hated on Chicago, but I'll give them a little credit. Brandon Marshall is a baller, the running game is great, and the defense is okay too. I'm not sold on Cutler. Detroit's remaining schedule is no problem for them (look at who they play at home and on the road!), they'll lock up the second NFC wild card with ease. Same case with Green Bay, the only game I see them losing in the future is @ Detroit. Ponder's hurt, Freeman's new (has to learn the offense), and Cassel's bad. I'm sorry, Adrian Peterson.

AFC North:
Cincinnati 12-4
Cleveland 7-9
Pittsburgh 6-10
Baltimore 3-13

Baltimore has a monster schedule, a pick-happy QB, and too many injuries. Will they lose out? Probably not, but I can't see a game on their schedule that they'll win. Pittsburgh will get healthier and Big Ben will get out of the funk he's in, but the ship has sailed on this team. Cleveland isn't bad, but they're not particularly good either. It's tough being a team that's all set except at QB since they'll likely play themselves out of a high draft pick. Maybe Hoyer is the QB of the future in Cleveland! Cincinnati isn't 12-4 good, but that's the benefit of playing in one of the NFL's worst divisions.

AFC East:

NY Jets 11-5
New England 9-7
Miami 7-9
Buffalo 5-11

The Jets are for real. The Jets are for real. The Jets are for real. There, okay. They win that division. New England will regress to the mean, but they're still a winning football team. The Dolphins, eh, I'm not sold. Two straight losses including a woeful choke job against a Baltimore team I have no faith in have tempered my expectations for the Dolphins. Bills are too hurt to accomplish anything this season, they have actually let Jeff Tuel see the field in the regular season and are banking on Thaddeus Lewis to bail them out. If you're asking who Jeff Tuel and Thaddeus Lewis are, well, so is Doug Marrone.

AFC West:

Denver 15-1
Kansas City 14-2
San Diego 7-9
Oakland 2-14

The Chiefs lose both their games against Denver, but can easily win out thanks to being in a meh division (AFC West), playing against a bad division (NFC East), and having a last-place schedule. Denver's nearly unstoppable, though I don't think they win at Indy. SD's a good team and Phil Rivers is having a bounce-back year, but having to play KC and DEN four times will sting. Oakland is a fun team to watch, but their offense is pitiful. Pryor has a future in this league though.

AFC South:

Indianapolis 13-3
Tennessee 9-7
Houston 8-8
Jacksonville 0-16

The Texans aren't a bad team, to be honest. Schaub's having a down year, but he's been a traditionally underrated player and I think he'll bounce back. Andrew Luck's a sophomore sensation with a great coach, and Trent Richardson will help them get over the hump. Tennessee is not a bad team, I've always liked Ryan Fitzpatrick (HE IS NOT A GREAT QB. HE IS GOOD ENOUGH TO START. I DO NOT THINK HE IS GOOD, JUST LIKE I DON'T THINK PONDER IS GOOD. I THINK THEY ARE AVERAGE. OKAY.) and Locker, when he comes back, has shown promise. Look me in the eye and tell me the Jags will win a game. You can't. Because they won't.

Playoffs:
AFC:
1. Denver
2. Indinapolis
3. NY Jets
4. Cincinnati
5. Kansas City
6. Tennessee (tie-breaker will go to TEN>NE)

NFC:
1. New Orleans
2. Seattle
3. Green Bay
4. Philadelphia
5. San Francisco
6. Detroit

Wild Card Round:
3. NY Jets>6. Tennessee
4. Cincinnati>5. Kansas City
3. Green Bay>6. Detroit
4. Philadelphia> 5.San Francisco

Divisional Round:
1. Denver>4. Cincinnati
2. Indianapolis>3. NY Jets
1. New Orleans> 4. Philadelphia
2. Seattle> 3. Green Bay

Conference Championships:

1. Denver>2. Indianapolis
1. New Orleans>2. Seattle (SEA is the better team but NO does not lose playoff games at home lol)

Super Bowl:

Denver>New Orleans
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Lol can I call you detroitTrollCat now?
 
well im not too unhappy, i just realized despite the ravens win the dolphins will make the playoffs if they beat the bills and jets, as the ravens either have to lose to bengals, or theyll win the division in which case dolphins and bengals tie, and the dolphins win that tiebreaker
 
I bitched a few weeks ago, not here but publicly on IRC, about how Bill Simmons posted this ridiculous column about how every season some team makes an amazing comeback from 3-6 or 4-5 and grabs a playoff slot, and then picked...all .500+ teams for his playoff picture. I picked Ravens because I am the fucking best (jk it was because AFC blows and their defense was like #9 or something ridiculously nice!)!!!
 
Thanks kd24 and the other Ravens bros.

Packers control their own playoff destiny and Aaron Rodgers makes his return next week.

3 years ago after a shaky season rife with a billion injuries (including a couple to Rodgers) we beat the bears in the season closer to make playoffs and made a Super Bowl run. This year after a season rife with injuries we have to beat the bears in the season closer to make the playoffs.

It's happening guys. If we make the playoffs, Green Bay Packers are gonna be this years Super Bowl winners.
 
Ravens dynasty plz, I would love to have a team win one year based on miracle offensive stats then somehow win it all again with the kicker scoring all the points.



Edit Sweep to be fair to both quarterbacks, they were both up against phenomenal pass rushing defenses with very meh lines
 
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Flacco vs. Stafford was painful to watch, utterly painful. Neither team looked good but give credit to Justin Tucker for being the best player on the field (damn Megatron and his drops tonight, they were devastating).
 
So are we blaming Johnson for that missed 2pt conversion? Was a pretty shit throw and think either way it was going to be an out of bounds catch
 
Phadunk said:
So are we blaming Johnson for that missed 2pt conversion? Was a pretty shit throw and think either way it was going to be an out of bounds catch
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I would blame the coaches for drawing up that play. Jimmy Smith plays shutdown D against anyone on outside route man coverage. Literally any other play would have been safer, like heck Johnson could have muscled out a slant/post/curl or they could have not done like 18 receivers on 1 side with Calvin by himself.
Too much faith in the rusty old decepticon
Edit: Megatron is actually like my non-Ravens favorite player, I'm hardcore fanboying on Jimmy Smith right now tho. Also the slant is so underrated
 
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any given sunday etc but:

chiefs beat colts (likely)
ravens beat pats (50/50)
bengals beat vikings (likely)
dolphins beat bills (likely)

followed by the next week being:

ravens beat bengals (50/50)
bills beat pats (unlikely)
dolphins beat jets (likely)
colts beat jaguars (likely)

lead to these playoffs:
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and hell if jacksonville beat the colts the ravens would secure the 2 seed! every result there looks possible except bills pats...BUT LETS GO BILLS. the idea that new england is still fighting for their playoff lives is hilarious to me
 
Man I can't wait until Flacco starts to actually eat up 20 million of the Ravens cap.

Stupid Patriots better not lose another game. If Peyton gets benched, jesus Christ if he gets benched week 17 i'll i'll fuck this gay earth. I'm already angry. I have no faith in the Chiefs and I always assume they'll lose every game, so it's up to the Patriots. The Chargers helped the cause, but I need the Patriots to stop choking against bad Raven teams.
 
It's sad to see that Arizona is likely not going to make the playoffs. They're better than whoever wins the NFC North and better than the Panthers. Palmer has really turned his season around since his atrocious start, and he could definitely lead them to a playoff berth next year or the year after.

It's also sad to realize that Lavonte David is going to be remembered this season as the guy who single-handedly lost the Buccaneers the game against the Jets because he should be the Defensive Player of the Year. He's got the most tackles for loss and the second-most interceptions amongst linebackers this year, and he's tied for sixth in passes defended for linebackers. He's having a monstrous season. Unless Kiko Alonso or J.J. Watt finish the season insanely, Lavonte David is the DPOY.

New Orleans takes the South, Detroit takes the North, Patriots take the other North, Seattle takes the West, Cincy takes the other North, and Eagles take the East. Wild Cards are Dolphins, Panthers, and 49ers.
 
It's sad to see that Arizona is likely not going to make the playoffs. They're better than whoever wins the NFC North and better than the Panthers. Palmer has really turned his season around since his atrocious start, and he could definitely lead them to a playoff berth next year or the year after.
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I was actually just about to post about this. It's gotta be hard being a Cardinals or a Rams fan, because I really think both of those teams could've and would've won most of the divisions in football. Either of them would've stomped the whole AFC South without a doubt and likely would've rolled over the NFC Least. The Cardinals are 8-2 outside of their division for fuck sakes, but they're not gonna make the playoffs because they're unlucky to be in a division with the Seahawks AND 49ers.
 
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