well 57: monkfish (about time)

[monkfish]

A stranger is being shown around a village that he has just become part of. He is shown a well and his guide says "On any day except Tuesday, you can shout any question down that well and you'll be told the answer." The man seems pretty impressed, and so he shouts down, "Why not on Tuesday?" A voice from in the well shouts back, "Because on Tuesday, it's your day in the well. Now get me out of here already!"

well smogon it only took 11 years. i did make a parody well thread before to whinge about how self-indulgent they are, but that was when i was an angsty 21 year old, i have changed my mind now. i think it's a nice opportunity for the community to get to know about Me and my good and correct opinions.

profile: monkfish
age: 32 and a half
location: london
job: computers
online job: postman
contributions to smogon: 5170 posts at time of posting; firemod '10-'12 (glory years); some dex features
related topics: cryptic crosswords, beards, bouldering, veganism, programming, posting, shade's mum
banned topics: monkfish's mum

 

[Ununhexium]

whats your favorite color?
favorite food?
ideal golf foursome?
drink of choice?
favorite TV show?
favorite movie?
why are you a vegan?

 

[phoopes]

What are birds?

Talk to me about beards.

Favorite thread/post of all time? Both posted by you and someone else

How is your mother responsible for 4% of all the biomass of Earth's mammals?

How/why did you join Smogon?

How'd you come up with your username?

How long have you been married? Any plans on having kids?

Favorite wittybot prompt?

 

[Mace]

• How's your dad?
• Favorite time of the year?
• Blood Type and birth stone?
• How is the American Revolutionary War taught in England?
• What star were you born under?
• Can we not invite Shade's mum to the wedding?
• How's next Thursday to meet my parents and our local fortune teller?

 

[Plague von Karma]

Are these your people?

 

[Sijih]

Opinions on Guernsey?
Operating system of choice?

Did you join smogon in Shoddybattle, Pokemon Online, or Pokemon Showdown era?
Were you an avid battler at any point? If so any teams that you remember really liking to use?
Any people you remember as really impressive battlers / cool community members from '06 forums?

 

[emma]

How was your adventure of re-creating wittybot for discord?

 

[monkfish]

whats your favorite color? red, the colour of my enemys blood
favorite food? pizza/the taste of my enemys blood
ideal golf foursome? is that a weird sexual thing. if not im not interested
drink of choice? im what shade would call an IPA wanker
favorite TV show? inside no. 9
favorite movie? muppets christmas carol
why are you a vegan? https://www.smogon.com/forums/threads/eating-animals.3669236/#post-8575680

What are birds? birds...my one weakness..they must be destroyed

Talk to me about beards. a beard is a woman who dates or marries a gay man to provide heterosexual cover, like amal clooney

Favorite thread/post of all time? Both posted by you and someone else
fav monkfish post: british fast food op because i made myself laugh thinking up the list
fav monkfish thread: ugliest person on facebook, i didnt contribute much apart from posting the image (it showed the viewer's own fb picture) but the responses were so good. i wish i had kept more irc logs
fav non-monkfish post: any steelicks post, in particular the ones from this thread and this op
fav non-monkfish thread: doduo. i still think about doduo constantly. he lives rent free inside my brain. the greatest troll whoever lived?

How is your mother responsible for 4% of all the biomass of Earth's mammals? pls see op

How/why did you join Smogon? i wanted to be the very best, like no one ever was. and also once i found #smogon and got kicked for arguing with chaos i knew i had found a home for life

How'd you come up with your username? its a character i liked from the fast show

How long have you been married? Any plans on having kids? im not married yet but have been engaged since dec 2019; covid put somewhat of a damper on wedding plans. i think we will have kids but it seems a little cruel to bring life into a civilisation that is hurtling towards implosion, maybe we will adopt

Favorite wittybot prompt? the best prompts have enough constraint to provide structure, but enough space to get creative. for example "Clowns to the left of me, jokers to right, here I am..." - you can go in quite a few directions

alright i should not have posted this thread while i was supposed to be working. taking a break to make sure i dont get fired

 

[BKC]

favorite smogon drama?

can you describe how smogon culture has evolved over the near decade and a half you've been on the site?

favorite competitive pokemon memories?

favorite pokemon?

where did your long-tenured sig ("carpe diem. thats spanish for live ur life. im out") originate, and why have you shed it after all these years?

 

[cookie]

what does your fiance know about the internet user known as monkfish

 

[War Incarnate]

would you say that any number divided by 0 is 1

what made you choose your username

least favorite pokemon?

favorite pokemon to use competitively?

least favorite pokemon to use competitively?

 

[Plague von Karma]

Are birds real?

 

[CaffeineBoost]

Why monkfish? Why not fighterfish or barbarianfish?

 

[monkfish]

• How's your dad? hes doing good thank u for asking. at the moment he is building a huge shed in his garden which i think he is really happy about
• Favorite time of the year? normally its around May when the uk starts getting good weather for a bit. this year can go fuck itself for obvious reasons
• Blood Type and birth stone? dragon (both)
• How is the American Revolutionary War taught in England? the what
• What star were you born under? dragon
• Can we not invite Shade's mum to the wedding? she cant come (ironically)
• How's next Thursday to meet my parents and our local fortune teller?

Are these your people?
View attachment 278782

im not comfortable with this level of public information pls remove

Opinions on Guernsey? big fan of the channel islands, think i would enjoy life there
Operating system of choice? i work on mac and i think now that it has games there is not much reason to run windows. to be honest they are all gonna end up at the same place, cloud computing
Did you join smogon in Shoddybattle, Pokemon Online, or Pokemon Showdown era? netbattle, the precursor to shoddybattle
Were you an avid battler at any point? If so any teams that you remember really liking to use? i feel like i was alright at ADV UU but i never played any tournaments so thats probably not true. there was no ladder back in the day, you just had to challenge people at random
Any people you remember as really impressive battlers / cool community members from '06 forums? i never paid much attention to the battling side of things, i was fairly exclusively here for IRC and firebot. there are far too many users from 06 who i would like to see posting again: steelicks, old chaos, cfickle/ls/alex [apparently not the same person??], Brain, Glen, DM, cloud, Justin8649, Vineon, Dweedle, Doomsday, CaptKirby, Clicky Pen, thunda, Dan Dan, Toothache, akuchi, natalie, Atlas, cookie- oh hes still here

 

[monkfish]

How was your adventure of re-creating wittybot for discord?

i enjoyed it and im still improving it every now and then. i write code for a living but its very different working with other people where you have to jump through certain hoops. being able to refactor the whole codebase on a whim is liberating and i improved my understanding of some general principles by doing it. also ive never hosted a site or a bot or anything so its gratifying doing this kind of thing

favorite smogon drama? great q. i think i missed a lot of drama, particularly the various splinter sites, i think i would have enjoyed that. my least favourite drama was the closure of firebot and banning of some users, about which i have some reservations that are sadly unlikely to be addressed

can you describe how smogon culture has evolved over the near decade and a half you've been on the site? i have actually only been on the site for about six years, from '06-'12. then i left and kind of forgot about it while getting myself a life, but i do regret that in some ways. the site culture is almost unrecognisable now which is inevitable with the amount of time and growth, but a little sad. to be honest the culture shifted hugely between '06-'12, probably more than '12-'20. although now you cant say (BAN ME PLEASE)

favorite competitive pokemon memories? i won a swsh lobby room OU tournament by getting stupid luck on five consecutive games. that was funny

favorite pokemon? doduo (see earlier post)

where did your long-tenured sig ("carpe diem. thats spanish for live ur life. im out") originate, and why have you shed it after all these years? i cant actually remember, it was some random gimmick which i searched for recently but now can't find - i used to change it regularly. the a monkfish post signature predates that so i thought i would bring it back as well as advertising wittybot. to be honest im surprised the pimp emoji is still on the site, it's very '06

edit - i found it lol. looking at it now its got to be a troll

 

[monkfish]

what does your fiance know about the internet user known as monkfish

lol, good question. she is the only person in my real life who knows that i am part of an online pokemon community but thats the extent of it. i only told her when i returned this year, im lucky that she is a very accepting and tolerant person. amongst other things!

would you say that any number divided by 0 is 1 what. no

what made you choose your username see prev

least favorite pokemon? charmander. the little turd

favorite pokemon to use competitively? gyarados, not doing so well these days

least favorite pokemon to use competitively? anything stall

Are birds real?

yes they are too fucking real my pedigree chum

Why monkfish? Why not fighterfish or barbarianfish?

monkfish is best fish

 

[shade]

favourite vegan recipes. 1 fast dish and 1 show stopper please.

what would you like to see become of smogoff? how do we get there?

reckon you could beat cookie in a fight?

 

[earl]

favorite menu item from eels warehouse?

 

[internet]

What's life like at the fish monastery? What denomination are you?

 

[WaterBomb]

What's the moist challenging thing for you about being vegan?
Have you ever actually eaten monkfish in your life? What was it like?
What is an online postman?
Why the lower case username?
How meticulous are you in caring for your beard? What is your routine?

 

[monkfish]

favourite vegan recipes. 1 fast dish and 1 show stopper please.

my fav fast-ish/easy go-to is this one pot artichoke and spinach pasta. i add pine nuts and sun dried tomatoes. magnifique
a little more labour intensive is this red ratatouille risotto. it has ruined all other risottos for me. salivating thinking about it

what would you like to see become of smogoff? how do we get there?

i would like to continue the legacy of smogon being a unique and fun place to post and hang out. i used to be someone who would complain about bad posts (and i still do privately) but i think that type of thing doesnt really contribute much and the better thing to try and do is to set an example. good posts always outshine bad and can turn meh threads into something fun

reckon you could beat cookie in a fight?

im not sure. ive probably got girth on my side but he is definitely a dirty fighter. pocket sand, hair pulling, etc

favorite menu item from eels warehouse?

gotta be the eels cheesesteak

What's life like at the fish monastery? What denomination are you?

its quiet, monastic, u know. im actually the boss now which is pretty cool so i just slack off all day and post shit

 

[Hipmonlee]

Did you know that, as much as it might not have seemed like it sometimes, LordSesshoumaru and LuGiAStorm were different people?

 

[xzern]

are you going to indoctrinate your kids into mons? give them the games etc?

favorite witty bot player?

 

[MAMP]

why do you spend so much time posting on a forum populated mainly by people who are less than half your age?

how has smogon changed since you’ve been gone? how do you feel about it?

 

[GatoDelFuego]

are you that cracking the cryptic guy