nah; drama. family drama and in-group drama did not help with romance experiences
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Lifestyle The Mental Wellness Thread
- Thread starter Rollout Shuckle
- Start date
But seems like you are cooking plans, so, go foward and belive
Hey there, fellow forum members! Today, I wanted to open up and share a part of my life that has been quite challenging lately. You see, I've been grappling with some mental hurdles that have made it difficult for me to navigate social interactions and spend ample time outside. It hasn't been an easy journey, but I'm learning to adapt and find solace in unexpected places.
One of the things that has truly been a saving grace for me is diving into the world of online gaming. While some may perceive it as a mere pastime, for me, it has become a valuable source of respite and mental rejuvenation. Games like Sudoku, chess, and Tic-Tac-Toe have become my go-to choices.
Engaging in these games allows me to fully immerse myself in a different realm, one where social pressures and anxieties take a backseat. I can focus solely on the puzzles at hand, strategize my moves, and challenge myself intellectually. There's a unique satisfaction that comes from cracking a tough Sudoku puzzle, devising intricate chess strategies, or engaging in an easy playing Tic-Tac-Toe (would be great if someone could share that experience with me in a friendly 2-person game).
What I find truly remarkable is how these games offer me a sense of control and accomplishment. They allow me to exercise my mind, sharpen my critical thinking skills, and provide a much-needed break from the complexities of daily life. While the challenges may be virtual, the positive impact they have on my mental well-being is very real.
Now, as a member of this wonderful forum, I wanted to reach out and connect with fellow gamers and enthusiasts. If any of you share a similar interest in these games or have recommendations for other mind-engaging activities, I'd be thrilled to hear from you. Your suggestions or even just some friendly conversation would mean a lot to me.
Remember, we all have our unique ways of finding comfort and relaxation. For me, it's through these online games that I'm able to cope and find a sense of balance. Let's continue supporting and encouraging one another on this journey.
Thank you for taking the time to read my story. I'm truly grateful to be a part of this community.
One of the things that has truly been a saving grace for me is diving into the world of online gaming. While some may perceive it as a mere pastime, for me, it has become a valuable source of respite and mental rejuvenation. Games like Sudoku, chess, and Tic-Tac-Toe have become my go-to choices.
Engaging in these games allows me to fully immerse myself in a different realm, one where social pressures and anxieties take a backseat. I can focus solely on the puzzles at hand, strategize my moves, and challenge myself intellectually. There's a unique satisfaction that comes from cracking a tough Sudoku puzzle, devising intricate chess strategies, or engaging in an easy playing Tic-Tac-Toe (would be great if someone could share that experience with me in a friendly 2-person game).
What I find truly remarkable is how these games offer me a sense of control and accomplishment. They allow me to exercise my mind, sharpen my critical thinking skills, and provide a much-needed break from the complexities of daily life. While the challenges may be virtual, the positive impact they have on my mental well-being is very real.
Now, as a member of this wonderful forum, I wanted to reach out and connect with fellow gamers and enthusiasts. If any of you share a similar interest in these games or have recommendations for other mind-engaging activities, I'd be thrilled to hear from you. Your suggestions or even just some friendly conversation would mean a lot to me.
Remember, we all have our unique ways of finding comfort and relaxation. For me, it's through these online games that I'm able to cope and find a sense of balance. Let's continue supporting and encouraging one another on this journey.
Thank you for taking the time to read my story. I'm truly grateful to be a part of this community.
recent times i've rounded many corners of prior frustrations from my hurt, anger, and even "demons" (let drinking get me a bit after my dad died - on top of everything prior but chilling with Pops was the "escape from nonsense") - lost a child, a love of my life and father way too close together - ruined me for awhile.
i genuinely feel "as a spirit in my cell" happier and now it's treating my cell better time cus the tolls paid to find the peace definitely have a debt.
but knowing the mental/spiritual finally aligned makes getting the physical better that much easier.
was a hell of a road (that i'm not dumb enough to act like i'm not still on) but i'll be damned if i don't enjoy this progress.
it's so much better than years ago talking about all i had or for that sake had lost.
life isn't perfect or anywhere near close, but it's fixed enough to be an experience i genuinely enjoy once again.
if that isn't a win i don't know what can ever be considered one.
i genuinely feel "as a spirit in my cell" happier and now it's treating my cell better time cus the tolls paid to find the peace definitely have a debt.
but knowing the mental/spiritual finally aligned makes getting the physical better that much easier.
was a hell of a road (that i'm not dumb enough to act like i'm not still on) but i'll be damned if i don't enjoy this progress.
it's so much better than years ago talking about all i had or for that sake had lost.
life isn't perfect or anywhere near close, but it's fixed enough to be an experience i genuinely enjoy once again.
if that isn't a win i don't know what can ever be considered one.
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I've realized something recently, and took it took me a long time to.
One of the defining traits of adulthood (imo) is making a careful, calculated decision on what should and shouldn’t bother you. Things get much easier when you eliminate the pressure of the “shouldn’t”s. I felt like this is pretty helpful.
And just as general advice, Pokemon really is one of the "shouldn'ts", I would say.
I personally main RBY OU and it has been talked about for years as meme tier, because its RNG elements are so infamous.
You're allowed to feel mad when losing to that stuff. But...also be aware of what game you decided to invest in (not like this doesn't ever happen in other gens/tiers either).
Chill out.
EDIT: Didn't want to doublepost.
Sometime I feel like giving up on things (not Pokemon, ironically). But: really, you never truly have failed until you've completely given up.
One of the defining traits of adulthood (imo) is making a careful, calculated decision on what should and shouldn’t bother you. Things get much easier when you eliminate the pressure of the “shouldn’t”s. I felt like this is pretty helpful.
And just as general advice, Pokemon really is one of the "shouldn'ts", I would say.
I personally main RBY OU and it has been talked about for years as meme tier, because its RNG elements are so infamous.
You're allowed to feel mad when losing to that stuff. But...also be aware of what game you decided to invest in (not like this doesn't ever happen in other gens/tiers either).
Chill out.
EDIT: Didn't want to doublepost.
Sometime I feel like giving up on things (not Pokemon, ironically). But: really, you never truly have failed until you've completely given up.
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I know it's very privileged to say this as many would love to be in my situation, but being a large, muscular man is... Honestly awful sometimes
I was always bigger and stronger than most people surrounding me. By 3rd grade, I was taller than my teacher. I was 185cm by 14. I am 195cm since I turned 17. I always heard from people that I could scare or intimidate them, even when I didn't want to. I learned over years to get a kinder look in my face and to keep more distance from people, especially women and smaller men, so they don't feel this way. But I still sometimes hear that I am scary and I see how people look at me when I walk towards them at night. The fact that I have a dark skin color and a full beard doesn't help
On the plus side, I've never been mugged or attacked, I was never in a physical fight because no one ever wanted to pick a fight with me. But on the other side, I wish my outside would reflect the calm and meek and non-threatening person I am inside
I was always bigger and stronger than most people surrounding me. By 3rd grade, I was taller than my teacher. I was 185cm by 14. I am 195cm since I turned 17. I always heard from people that I could scare or intimidate them, even when I didn't want to. I learned over years to get a kinder look in my face and to keep more distance from people, especially women and smaller men, so they don't feel this way. But I still sometimes hear that I am scary and I see how people look at me when I walk towards them at night. The fact that I have a dark skin color and a full beard doesn't help
On the plus side, I've never been mugged or attacked, I was never in a physical fight because no one ever wanted to pick a fight with me. But on the other side, I wish my outside would reflect the calm and meek and non-threatening person I am inside
This past Tuesday I celebrated my 21st birthday, a day that where I come from usually has… other underlying intentions. I’ve known from the very start I didn’t want to even think about doing some of those things. Beyond this, I’ve had a lot of anxiety regarding various topics over the past few months, much of which has helped me to realize just how good I actually have it in life.
Let me ask you all a question. Do you ever feel like it’s wrong to accept help from others? Or that it’s a bad thing to want something when you’re fully aware other people have it worse off? I wasn’t sure where else to post about it or how else to describe my situation, but it feels like I can’t get myself to be happy over things that are given to me anymore. I would much rather be able to try and work for and earn the things I want, which is already a small list given my growing anxiety about basically everything. My friends and family keep saying I need to be able to look after myself, too, but I simply can’t do that without feeling I’m living a life of guilt. The problem is, what specifically would I be guilty for doing? Do I feel this way because I feel bad about how good we’ve had it? How much of what I have at my disposal is just because “we were lucky” and not because I actually earned it?
Let me ask you all a question. Do you ever feel like it’s wrong to accept help from others? Or that it’s a bad thing to want something when you’re fully aware other people have it worse off? I wasn’t sure where else to post about it or how else to describe my situation, but it feels like I can’t get myself to be happy over things that are given to me anymore. I would much rather be able to try and work for and earn the things I want, which is already a small list given my growing anxiety about basically everything. My friends and family keep saying I need to be able to look after myself, too, but I simply can’t do that without feeling I’m living a life of guilt. The problem is, what specifically would I be guilty for doing? Do I feel this way because I feel bad about how good we’ve had it? How much of what I have at my disposal is just because “we were lucky” and not because I actually earned it?
just about everything. you might have worked for everything you have, been given everything you have, or somewhere in between, but all of that assumes that you were in the position to receive anything to begin with. that might not be the case if you were born in a different country, 4 states away, or even 3 neighborhoods away. if the world was a true meritocracy where what you have is dictated by how hard you work, then america would probably be towards the bottom of the list and kids in india would be living the jeffrey bezos life. this is not the situation we live in, not in the US and definitely not in the world.
given that, you can either reject everything you have (whether you worked for it or not) and live in a cabin in an isolated forest in iowa, or you can use what you have to try to create a better world around you. neither is a perfect solution logically speaking, but we don't live in a perfect world and the latter at least attempts to helps you and others.
this is a separate issue from a systemic analysis, though. if you're having trouble accepting help in your personal life, then that's just stubbornness rather than a motivation to live "fairly" (we already don't live in a fair world).
i think it stems from the (most likely erroneous) feeling that anything you do in return to reciprocate won't be adequate. chances are, if you're this worried about it, anything you're doing in return is probably going above and beyond to pay the person back. if you're still not sure, you can talk with the person(s) to get a sense of what they're feeling.
I’m not sure if this will help further clarify where I’m at mentally right now, but for what it’s worth, I recognize a lot of how I’m feeling about this comes from the extensive negativity I often find myself exposed to. I can always try and cut out sources of negativity from my daily routine, but at some point I start asking myself if I need to go one step further. Take my video games, for example. Is it really right of me to even want to play those if why I even have access to them can be traced back to “because my family was lucky”? Or what about getting myself a nice meal to enjoy at some restaurant who knows where?
My problem ultimately comes down to me not knowing how I can or should properly show my appreciation for the good things in my life without feeling like I’m not being a hard worker on my own merits. Because believe me- I’m the kind of person who finds the progress of working more rewarding than anything regarding fun hobbies at this point. I appreciate your feedback and wanting to help. :)
I'm going to infodump here after I researched a loooot of things regarding cPTSD (complex PTSD). Today, I basically remembered that I might be autistic which is chill and all; it would make a lot of sense considering a lot of the symptoms of autism that I definitely do have like the social withdrawal and how I'm sometimes really isolated myself. However, there are a lot of red flags over the previous few months that I still struggle a lot regarding cPTSD. I struggle to open up emotionally to even people such as my girlfriend, I try to hide my emotions when there's danger and then dissociate because I'm breaking down inside, I don't really say when I'm uncomfortable and I tend to lash out unrelentlessly when people trigger me. After that, I did researching on reddit to see the effects of cPTSD on the brain compared to something like being on the autism spectrum and its apparently really similar, so something like social withdrawal might not be linked to me having autism.
Something that I saw that was really interesting is that trauma molds the brain differently during development. I was really sad when I learned this because I thought I would forever have to live with a traumatized brain, but I did some more research and the concept of neuroplasticity basically says that the brain can be molded differently even though it has been inflicted with damage in the form of trauma. I'm going to try and basically re-organize my brain to the point where it can function normally again. It's been pretty much getting owned throughout my childhood so it makes sense why I haven't ever been "normal" even for someone who's neurodivergent, although if I have autism then that's perfectly fine too! Some of the things I'm going to try and basically break the bad neural pathways is taking risks, doing things I'm usually afraid of for no reason, and basically just living life! Life has been good over the past few months since I've cut down a bit on the video gaming and focused more on important things, and I'm trying to get back on my feet again.
Also, I found out I have OCD and I've been working on that the past few months, specifically relationship OCD. I have a lot of distress over not being able to figure out what happens in the future, and it's something I want to work on: accepting uncertainty. It's like how in Pokemon, you can't ever guarantee you're going to win, but you accept the uncertainty and try as hard as you can anyways. It's the same for relationships in my case, where "winning" in a relationship and having it work out is so important to me and the anxiety prevents me from focusing on the present and the woman I have next to me. For the trauma, I'm going to try and keep a journal on it on my phone that describes my cPTSD progress, like my general thoughts, what I did that day and stuff like that. I'm going to re-prioritize self care and try to re-parent and challenge myself to get rid of the cPTSD, as well as the host of issues it has such as depression, anxiety, rOCD, and maladaptive thinking patterns.
Something that I saw that was really interesting is that trauma molds the brain differently during development. I was really sad when I learned this because I thought I would forever have to live with a traumatized brain, but I did some more research and the concept of neuroplasticity basically says that the brain can be molded differently even though it has been inflicted with damage in the form of trauma. I'm going to try and basically re-organize my brain to the point where it can function normally again. It's been pretty much getting owned throughout my childhood so it makes sense why I haven't ever been "normal" even for someone who's neurodivergent, although if I have autism then that's perfectly fine too! Some of the things I'm going to try and basically break the bad neural pathways is taking risks, doing things I'm usually afraid of for no reason, and basically just living life! Life has been good over the past few months since I've cut down a bit on the video gaming and focused more on important things, and I'm trying to get back on my feet again.
Also, I found out I have OCD and I've been working on that the past few months, specifically relationship OCD. I have a lot of distress over not being able to figure out what happens in the future, and it's something I want to work on: accepting uncertainty. It's like how in Pokemon, you can't ever guarantee you're going to win, but you accept the uncertainty and try as hard as you can anyways. It's the same for relationships in my case, where "winning" in a relationship and having it work out is so important to me and the anxiety prevents me from focusing on the present and the woman I have next to me. For the trauma, I'm going to try and keep a journal on it on my phone that describes my cPTSD progress, like my general thoughts, what I did that day and stuff like that. I'm going to re-prioritize self care and try to re-parent and challenge myself to get rid of the cPTSD, as well as the host of issues it has such as depression, anxiety, rOCD, and maladaptive thinking patterns.
This is something I've struggled with in the past. I would say just try to take pride in the fact that you gave it your all. I used to do over-analyzing for every single accomplishment I had and it would only lead to imposter syndrome to the point where no accomplishment felt "real" anymore. Now I believe that if you keep on trying your best, then you're always going to make progress. Over-analyzing your achievements ultimately won't do any good because life is full of probability. A runner wins a marathon, but he's technically "lucky" for doing so since you can argue he has the superior genetics, can afford the time and money to put into the race, and may be paired up with worse contestants. If those factors had not come in play, hence the randomness of life, then he would not have run the marathon. However, that does not discount the fact that he won the marathon, and that in itself is very impressive. You can also use Pokemon as an example. You can always beat the best Pokemon players with a combination of good matchup and luck given how the game goes, but at the end of the day beating ABR in the finals of OST would still be very notable accomplishment. I would say letting go with expectations helps a lot and allows you to put your own progress into perspective. People grow at different rates, and trying to discount your own progress using the reasoning of life's luck or the fact that you didn't do good enough will only lead to resentment. Good luck!
I feel this so hard. I'm a 6'4'' man (don't know what that is in normal units) and it shapes almost all my interactions. I never see this explored in media or talked about in the discourse, either, so it must sound totally alien to people who don't have this problem. Worst of all is how it shapes my interactions with women, who are all extremely afraid of me unless I take steps to make them not. Of course I take these steps now but I didn't always in the past, and it wasn't obvious to me that I needed to bc there weren't any role models/scripts for making the transition from child to large man. And of course people won't tell you except the kindest or most autistic.
One night I had a girl at my place (not a flex btw) and she said something like "it's so weird, I walk down the street and 30% of strangers want to bang [sic] me, just bc of how i look, so my interactions with strangers are always asymmetrical from the start". And I wanted to respond "well 60% of strangers know that I could easily kill them, and it would not be difficult or require a weapon, so that destroys my interactions with strangers too" but didn't (this is one of the things I learned not to do btw), but I think it's really true. And of course she didn't even consider it, bc no one realizes it's a problem except people like us.
Like you I'm not muggable and I think people respect and fear me more even in non-violent situations. But ironically I think my ability to escalate is much much more constrainted than a small person or woman. Bc in school (or whatever) if someone ever makes me look at all violent or dangerous you can bet the authorities are gonna take that person seriously. Actually this was a huge liability in dealing w bullies when I grew up, bc "beat them up" is a much harder line to take when the authorities are gonna crack down on you super hard if they think you're even slightly violent.
Really sorry to hear you have to deal with having dark skin and a beard on top of all this. I'm grateful every day that I am a whitey bc I cannot imagine the extra danger points that black, hispanic, and middle eastern bring with them.
Anyways, you are not alone, keep on trucking, best of luck out there brother.
I think I am 6'4 in burger units too but I am not too sure.
Yeah I fully get what you mean. There wasn't much bullying going on in my school, I was mostly just ignored and left out of things, but I always noticed how my parents treated me extremely different from my older siblings when I got angry. It was okay when my sisters got angry, bit everytime I showed any anger, it was a huge problem and I was told I had to control myself. At some point, it made me only more angry. I wasn't allowed to really talk or interact much with others because my parents feared I would get angry and lash out, which would be worse in my case compared to my sisters
Btw there is a very beautiful manga/anime that covers this called Beastars. It's furry bait but very good. The main character in it is a timid wolf that is often feared by others and feels bad due to it. It was written by a woman, interestingly enough, but she understood this issue absolutely perfectly
I lost my job recently and I was rejected pretty hard to boot too. My insecurities are acting up again, my anxiety too
Weird but very accurate comparison to me is Tony Montana. I see people with wealth, power, men with attractive women by their sides and don't have a real place in this world by myself. So I get jealous and hostile and want to have whatever the others have, but the more and more I get the less satisfied I become somehow. I used to feel bad because I never got job offers, now I get them regularly but I am jealous of people who get good, proper offers that are actually enticing. I used to feel like less of a man because I never received attention from women, now I get some attention from women but I still feel frustrated because none of my matches or women that hit on me seem enticing
Like what the fuck is wrong with me? I felt more secure and better about myself as a teen, when I was skinnyfat, dependent on my parents, had nothing in my pockets or in my mind, and now I somehow feel worse?
What can I even do? I feel stronger and stronger over my inadequacis the older I get and the more I progress
Weird but very accurate comparison to me is Tony Montana. I see people with wealth, power, men with attractive women by their sides and don't have a real place in this world by myself. So I get jealous and hostile and want to have whatever the others have, but the more and more I get the less satisfied I become somehow. I used to feel bad because I never got job offers, now I get them regularly but I am jealous of people who get good, proper offers that are actually enticing. I used to feel like less of a man because I never received attention from women, now I get some attention from women but I still feel frustrated because none of my matches or women that hit on me seem enticing
Like what the fuck is wrong with me? I felt more secure and better about myself as a teen, when I was skinnyfat, dependent on my parents, had nothing in my pockets or in my mind, and now I somehow feel worse?
What can I even do? I feel stronger and stronger over my inadequacis the older I get and the more I progress
Eating fast food and smoking usually cheers me up.
I'm just a teen, but my advice is to not think about all of that. Just think of what is in front of you and how you can do that to the best ability. Your boss wants you do to do this project, you are going to do it with the best of your ability. You play showdown? Do it to the best you can. You can also go the the gym. I used to be really skinny and nerdy, but after going for a year, I feel much more confident like I can do anything. Don't feel bad that you don't have the money or the girls, they will come once you once it all gets better. I find it as a way to stay happy is to think of my improvement as a human being (eg. wow i did good on my test today, wow i just broke my record for bench) Results won't come instantly, but if you keep your head up, they will.
Stay strong brother, waytoopetty.
depression has been hitting me like a truck lately, and life frankly just sucks for me rn, loneliness, no friends, miss my mom.. list goes on
Recently had a issue with my best friend over a girl i use to talk to (not about her at all, but because he and i both know the tolls of the crossed paths in that realm) and he hide and lied cus even tho they said they wouldnt i also told em i cant control you. but they said "we'll respect it"
a brother tier friend feeling the need to hide and lie for months even tho i told him me and the girl mutually split cus "it" wasnt there so do what thou wilt i just dont like it and you agreeing not to --- bro all you had to do is say you really like one another. that i can respect. you just asked how i felt cus of the ptsd a bit from my old relationship; and we did both lose former best friends to that side of things so while again "i cant stop you, i just wouldnt dare that myself" was essentially my stance.
idk not mad about anything from the actual act side (cus the feelings and bonds werent there and me and the girl split perfectly from literally not much more than a "Talking phase", more so him feeling the need to hide and lie)
as "Brother tier" friends for half our life im just a bit hurt and confused how to read him now if you can hide and lie to me after all this time over that ---- when you KNOW i'd never block ya blessings as your brother....
I even told the girl "I'm upset my "Brother" felt he needed to hide - even though he knew i knew rather than being real. I was thrown off by him, everything else was irrelevant"
All it took was a talk cus it wouldve never been about you finding someone it's always to me been "bro, just talk to me" cus even when id lob him an easy chance to hed deflect.
a brother tier friend feeling the need to hide and lie for months even tho i told him me and the girl mutually split cus "it" wasnt there so do what thou wilt i just dont like it and you agreeing not to --- bro all you had to do is say you really like one another. that i can respect. you just asked how i felt cus of the ptsd a bit from my old relationship; and we did both lose former best friends to that side of things so while again "i cant stop you, i just wouldnt dare that myself" was essentially my stance.
idk not mad about anything from the actual act side (cus the feelings and bonds werent there and me and the girl split perfectly from literally not much more than a "Talking phase", more so him feeling the need to hide and lie)
as "Brother tier" friends for half our life im just a bit hurt and confused how to read him now if you can hide and lie to me after all this time over that ---- when you KNOW i'd never block ya blessings as your brother....
I even told the girl "I'm upset my "Brother" felt he needed to hide - even though he knew i knew rather than being real. I was thrown off by him, everything else was irrelevant"
All it took was a talk cus it wouldve never been about you finding someone it's always to me been "bro, just talk to me" cus even when id lob him an easy chance to hed deflect.
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reading this back three years later is pretty surreal lol. around this time every year is still a bit hard for me, but i manage. i spent a lot of time by myself after i wrote that post; i grieved and i cried, but i made it through. it's hard to not let a moment like that define you, especially when you'll carry it with you forever, but i think i've found a good balance. i'd like to think that despite all the pain it caused, it wasn't for nothing. that time of my life gave me purpose and an unwavering belief in myself. if i was able to make it through one of the hardest things life could throw at me, why wouldn't i get through anything else?
i'm still working a job i don't necessarily love, but it pays the bills. i'm still making music (i just signed my first distribution deal a couple months ago), and i met someone new that i love very much. to say i'm happy wouldn't be the whole truth, but i'm very grateful and very hopeful. if you're in this thread going through the hardest time in your life, i promise it gets better. cliche or not, it's the truth, and i hope you can find some sort of comfort in that. sending love out to everyone that needs it
I feel like he had no ill intentions and feared you may be hurt by him telling you about his feelings towards this girl. I can however perfectly understand your side, I was in a comparable situation recently and I did feel rather frustrated with the other part not being transparent, despite them being well-meaning
Have you tried just talking it out with him? He may not know or realize that this is how you feel, that you would react this way and/or that you split up with this girl due to the from you mentioned reasons
I always been scared of the prospect of death
but at times it's extremely overwhelming and I keep thinking about what it's like to not exist and all the existential shit
I just tend to overthink it and suddenly I'm spiraling and it's awful
Does anyone have any strategies to snap me out of the spirals?
but at times it's extremely overwhelming and I keep thinking about what it's like to not exist and all the existential shit
I just tend to overthink it and suddenly I'm spiraling and it's awful
Does anyone have any strategies to snap me out of the spirals?
I can understand this fear of the unknown; as I feel many of us may think about it especially when it happens, or we see something that signals to it even I sometimes do. The best thing I can think of (and this depends on the person) try to surround yourself with things you enjoy or little projects that keep your mind off this topic like maybe doing yard work, meditation, or fishing. These little activities or exercises can help, but if worse case and if needed talking to someone close can help you like a family member or a therapist. Continual thinking of this will inevitably cause issues down the line, and I am certain this is what you'd like to avoid. For me personally, the communities that I am in; particularly the Wi-Fi server has in a way "filled a void" in me when I was "lost". This unknown I mentioned above is natural, but it should not control your life.
I know that's what it was and we spoke about it - we're not at odds (hell we work together so no one needs that in the workplace) just told him i wouldn't expect that from you when you should know me better.
we're not at odds, hell hes the one who just texted me my week vacation was approved for later this month - just a bit bothered cus it was all unnecessary.
all will be fine, just a bit bothered by it all.
My prefered strategy is cardiovascular exercise. I find it to be essential for snapping me out of negative thought patterns like this. Here's how I do it:
1. Pick 8 exercises that I'm gonna do, ideally covering the whole body. If you repeat areas or do 1 exercise, your muscles in that area will get tired before your heart gets exerted (if you're out of shape like me at least). You want to exert each part of your body in turns since you can give each muslce group a break, but your heart never gets a break.
An example: push up, jumping squat, burpee, sit up, high knees (run in place but put your knees up), russian twist, mountain climber, jumping jack
2. Set a "tabata timer". I have an app for this, but basically it means you spend 40 seconds doing the exercise as hard as you can, then ten seconds resting. I like to do each exercise once, so doing all of them takes 400 seconds, and then I repeat that process four times. In total, if I stick to the timer, this takes less than half an hour.
3. Turn on intense music and do the exercise. It doesn't require any equipment so I can do it even while in an Airbnb. After I do the exercise, I'm usually resistant to negative thoughts for about 24 hours.
if you cease to exist after death whats the point of worrying about it, its not like you can regret it happening to you once you're no longer. Had a phase of existential dread back when I was a young teenager, at this point I've figured out it's a complete waste of time to despair about something both inevitable and unknowable. I just want to live a good life and hope that when the time comes, I'm ready