(Archive) Small Objective Changes Thread

[His Eminence Lord Poppington II]

http://www.smogon.com/dp/pokemon/mamoswine

On the same analysis that I posted about earlier,

'Uber Lead'

'Abomasnow can activate Mamoswine's Snow Cloak ability whilst finishing off Deoxys-A's and Rayquaza's Focus Sash thanks to hail,'

Air lock prevents Rayquaza's sash from being eliminated by hail, sorry, didn't see it last time.

 

[Aeron Ee1]

why are you sorry? O_o *fixed*

 

[wekhter]

Sorry in advance for the long post. I was reading through Rotom-C for set ideas and noticed a lot of awkward phrasing, so I decided to check out the other Rotom pages. I suppose I'm nothing if not a thorough copy-editor. e_e;

Rotom http://www.smogon.com/dp/pokemon/rotom

• Throughout the page curly apostrophes ( ’ ) are used, which is not standard.

• "Considering the pattern of Steel- and Dark-types being nuisances for the most part, Fighting-types such as Blaziken, Hariyama, Hitmonlee, Hitmontop, and Toxicroak that can deal with the aforementioned types make good partners." Considering the problems caused by Steel- and Dark-types, Fighting-types such as Blaziken, Hariyama, Hitmonlee, Hitmontop, and Toxicroak make good partners.

• "Rotom is capable of abusing almost every status effect, and this set is dedicated to inflict as much status as it can against the opponent’s team." Dedicated to inflicting.

• "[...] though they should watch our for Will-O-Wisp and the occasional Hidden Power Ice." Watch out for.

Rotom-C http://www.smogon.com/dp/pokemon/rotom-c

• "Thus a switch usually occurs, and that's when Tyranitar usually takes the stage and threaten it with either its STAB Crunch, Pursuit, or Dark Pulse." And threatens it. Additionally, "either" should really only refer to one or the other of two and is best omitted in this sentence.

• "Rotom-C also has the presence of its abundance of resistances." Rotom-C also has an abundance of resistances.

• "Not only that but having Light Screen, Reflect, and Thunder Wave give it the niche over many Ghost-types." Having access to Light Screen, Reflect, and Thunder Wave give it the edge over many other Ghost-types.

• "Its base Speed of 86 even has the mention of outpacing Adamant Heracross." Its base Speed of 86 is worth mentioning for outpacing Adamant Heracross.

• "Thunderbolt and Discharge is a matter of personal preference;" Thunderbolt or Discharge.

• [...] so Rotom-C won't have much problems taking down a Flygon and such." "Won't have many problems", "taking down Flygon", and what's "and such?"

• "Despite those circumstances, Rotom-C makes a fine user of the dubious double status ambition." Honestly, I'm not even sure.

• "Even Zapdos doesn't want to mess with this set frequently, in fear of status laying waste to his capability to Roost Stone Edge easier or depleting 12% of health instead." Lost me at the end.

• "The reason Leaf Storm is not listed as an option is that alongside Discharge or Shadow Ball, it does not provide great coverage unlike Hidden Power Ice or Hidden Power Fighting." Leaf Storm is not listed as an option because Hidden Power Ice or Hidden Power Fighting provide greater coverage alongside Discharge and Shadow Ball.

• "If you feel that more Defense is necessary than Special Defense than simply swap around the Defense and Special Defense EVs and use a Bold nature instead." Then simply swap.

• "[...] so this may not be such big a problem." Such a big problem.

• "Once these Pokemon are out the way [...]" Out of the way.

• "Hidden Power Ground is another option to hit Heatran hard who often switches in, but it will not OHKO." Hidden Power Ground is another option to hit common switch-in Heatran hard, but it will not OHKO.

• "Using a dual screens strategy is an option should you want the help your team mates take hits better." Using dual screens is an option should you want to help your teammates take hits better.

• "It is a very dominant special wall that sponges every special attack from Rotom-C and heal off the damage with either Wish or Softboiled." Heals off the damage.

Rotom-F http://www.smogon.com/dp/pokemon/rotom-f

• "Rotom-F is also no slouch offensively, with STAB Thunderbolt and access to Blizzard giving it a pseudo-BoltBeam combination it can also be a potent sweeper." Offensively. With STAB. (It's a run-on sentence.)

• "Gengar is another Pokemon who you should be prepared for." Whom you should be.

Rotom-H http://www.smogon.com/dp/pokemon/rotom-h

• "[...] and the remaining EVs were delegated to Defense." Are delegated.

• "The EVs give Rotom-H roughly equal defenses with a slight emphasis in Defense." Emphasis on Defense.

Rotom-S http://www.smogon.com/dp/pokemon/rotom-s

• "[...] Blissey sponges all of the set's attacks [...]" All of this set's.

• "The remaining EVs were placed in HP [...]" Are placed.

• "Electivire is in a similar boat, although if its physical based it won't enjoy Choice Specs or Will-O-Wisp." If it's physically based.

Rotom-W http://www.smogon.com/dp/pokemon/rotom-w

• Pokémon is written with the accent, which is not standard.

• Hyphen-minuses surrounded by spaces ( - ) are used instead of em dashes (—).

• "To conclude a recommended list or partners for Rotom-W, [...]" List of partners.

• "Tyranitar can come in with little to no effort, absorb either move thanks to its high Special Defense, and use Pursuit to trap and eventually OHKO the washing machine." Eventually killing it is not an OHKO.

• "While the counters of Choice Specs Rotom-W return to resist its attack yet again, the vulnerability of this set both introduced and removed some counters." Both introduces and removes.

• "Discharge and Hydro Pump give Rotom-W the difference between its other formes." Discharge and Hydro Pump distinguish Rotom-W from its other formes.

• "The EVs here are recommended for balance of both defenses." The EVs here are recommended to balance both defenses.

• "Anything with a set up move and has enough defenses to be protected by dual screens are ideal teammates; [...]" Anything with a set-up move and enough defenses to be protected by dual screens makes an ideal teammate.

There's more awkward phrasing in the Rotom-C analysis in particular, but I figured I'd list only larger errors. I hope this isn't nit-picky or whatever.

 

[jc104]

Wow wekhter, that's a lot of stuff you've got there. I think the reason is that a combined analysis has been planned, so they have been ignored, but anyway I'll get to fixing those.

edit - fixed pretty much all of those except apostrophes, dashes etc. Good work - you should consider joining the GP team if you want to help out more.

 

[(makeup)]

O:

Protect is another excellent moveand allows Burmy to scout opponent's movesets, particularly those of Taillow and Ponyta, while they fail to touch this defense fortress.

Eww^^^
I even wrote this one.
Perhaps it can be:

Protect is another excellent that allows Burmy to scout opponent's movesets, particularly those of Taillow and Ponyta, while they fail to touch this defense fortress.

http://www.smogon.com/dp/pokemon/burmy

It's in the tank set.

 

[(makeup)]

err I meant "Protect is another excellent move that allows Burmy to scout opponent's moveset, particularly those of Taillow and Ponyta while they fail to touch this defense fortress."

I also added an unnecessary comma >_<

 

[Umbreon Dan]

O:

Protect is another excellent moveand allows Burmy to scout opponent's movesets, particularly those of Taillow and Ponyta, while they fail to touch this defense fortress.

Eww^^^
I even wrote this one.
Perhaps it can be:

Protect is another excellent that allows Burmy to scout opponent's movesets, particularly those of Taillow and Ponyta, while they fail to touch this defense fortress.

http://www.smogon.com/dp/pokemon/burmy

It's in the tank set.

err I meant "Protect is another excellent move that allows Burmy to scout opponent's moveset, particularly those of Taillow and Ponyta while they fail to touch this defense fortress."

I also added an unnecessary comma >_<

s p a c e

 

[wekhter]

Uh, not a spelling/grammar error, but the Items page is messed up:

http://www.smogon.com/dp/items/

This is the problem:

<td><a href="/dp/moves/Rain_Dance>Rain Dance</a> lasts 8 turns.</td>

There needs to be a quotation mark and the end of the link, before the greater than.

<td><a href="/dp/moves/Rain_Dance">Rain Dance</a> lasts 8 turns.</td>

 

[Fatecrashers]

i can't fix it cos it keeps throwing out an unhandled exception

help

 

[iDunno]

Pokemon Dictionary[/URL]]ClericA Pokemon who uses Aromatherapy or Heal Bell to cure itself and its team of status.With Blissey's fantastic Special Defense and HP stats, she has many opportunities to help her team out with Aromatherapy.

It doesn't actually use the term "cleric" in the example.

 

[Fatecrashers]

fixed that cleric business

 

[alex123]

It is very nice flash work.I am really looking for this.How i can make things like this on my pics.I really need this.Please share about this.Thank you.

 

[Nix_Hex]

In the R/B Jynx Analysis under Opinion should read:

Keep your Jynx far away from Normal Pokémon, (comma) and Starmie and Slowbro and you should hopefully be alright and she will perform effectively.

or something along those lines.

 

[cosmicexplorer]

This is a pretty long list, sorry for that.

Hide

http://smogon.com/dp/pokemon/groudon
Second paragraph of the Support set

Lugia can only recover off the staving effects of poison so many times before falling.

This should probably be "Lugia can only stave off the damage from Toxic so many times before falling."


http://smogon.com/dp/pokemon/rayquaza
First paragraph of Choice Band set

Although it may seem inferior to Choice Band Garchomp at first glance, who has STAB on its Earthquake, higher base Speed, and immunity to Thunder Wave and other Electric-type attacks, but this is not the case.

http://smogon.com/dp/pokemon/gengar
First paragraph of the Uber Life Orb set

(in the sun it has a small chance to OHKO, but its only a 3HKO in the rain)

"it's" is mispelled as "its"


http://www.smogon.com/smog/issue14/featured_pokemon
In the "Playing Against Reuniclus" section

You can't deal with Reunuclus in the same way that you might deal with other bulky threats.

"Reuniclus" is mispelled as "Reunuclus"


http://www.smogon.com/smog/issue14/featured_pokemon_lc
In the first paragraph

Generation V threw that stereotype out of Evolution Stone.

"of" should be "with"


http://www.smogon.com/smog/issue14/vgc2011
"Rain Dance" section

There is only one Swift Swimmer- Seismitoad and its offensive stats aren't overly stellar.

If I'm not mistaken, there should be an emdash around "Seismitoad" on both sides.


http://www.smogon.com/smog/issue14/vgc2011
The section on Jellicent

thanks to the abundance of Fighting] and Water moves

http://www.smogon.com/smog/issue14/uwabilities
Suggested Pokemon for Big Pecks

It's likely that Skarmory can preserve its boost(s, who the hell is unlucky enough to give Skarmory both a Defense AND a Special Defense boost needs to go see a fortune teller, right now)

The parenthesis and comma should be moved.


http://www.smogon.com/smog/issue14/uwabilities
The section on which Pokemon received Competitive Spirit

This looks decent on Braviary, but too bad its Speed is sub-par and it has no reliable way of increasing its Speed.

http://smogon.com/dp/pokemon/shaymin-s
The Team Options and Additional Comments section for the Life Orb set is in line with the Set Comments paragraph, and not one line down like it should be.


http://smogon.com/dp/pokemon/staraptor
In the Overview

in OU play. Intimidate allows it to be viable in OU play,

I don't believe "OU play" should be repeated.


http://smogon.com/dp/pokemon/shiftry
first paragraph of the Nasty Plot set

simply use Nasty Plot to boost Shiftry's attack

"attack" should be "Special Attack"


http://smogon.com/dp/pokemon/cresselia
Ubers Overview

Due to no Stealth Rock weakness

This should probably be "due to the lack of Stealth Rock weakness," or something similar.

http://smogon.com/dp/pokemon/cresselia
Third paragraph of the Uber Wall set

Cresselia will even survive a +2 Jolly Rayquaza's Outrage around 5%
of the time after Stealth Rock damage factoring in one turn of Leftovers recovery. Without the Leftovers recovery, the chance is 53.85%.

How does 5% go to 53.85% with less health?


http://www.smogon.com/rb/pokemon/tauros
The set comments of the Late game sweeper set

(Counter only works against Fighting and Normal moves in the R/B/Y).

This should probably be changed to "...Fighting- and Normal-type moves in RBY"


http://smogon.com/rs/pokemon/medicham
First paragraph of counters section

Even Focus Punch hurts coming from a potential 720 STAB attack.

http://smogon.com/rs/pokemon/rhydon
Set comments of the Choice Band set

Unlike the Swords Dancer

There is no Swords Dance set in the analysis.


http://smogon.com/gs/pokemon/shuckle
Other Options

Safeguard let's Shuckle

 

[zdrup15]

First time doing this. I fixed everything but these 3:

http://smogon.com/dp/pokemon/groudon
Second paragraph of the Support set

This should probably be "Lugia can only stave off the damage from Toxic so many times before falling."


http://smogon.com/dp/pokemon/staraptor
In the Overview

I don't believe "OU play" should be repeated.


http://smogon.com/dp/pokemon/cresselia
Third paragraph of the Uber Wall set

How does 5% go to 53.85% with less health?

Thanks a lot for all this work!

 

[Fatecrashers]

fixed groudon and staraptor, i dont have a clue about cresselia

 

[TelamonianAjax]

So I just checked the calc, and +2 Jolly Rayquaza hits Uber Wall Cressellia for 81.1–95.5%. After SR Damage, Cress has 87.5% health left. Factoring in one turn of Leftovers recovery, Cress has 93.75% left. I think it's just missing a number.

Using Slipperjeans's damage calculator, Rayquaza has a 50% chance to KO without a turn of Leftovers recovery (including chance to critical hit; otherwise it's 46%). With a turn, it goes down to 13% (including crit; otherwise it's 8%).

 

[Venser]

On the credits page, Blue Kirby's article on berries links to http://www.smogon.com/dp/articles/berries when it should link to http://www.smogon.com/ingame/misc/berries

 

[(makeup)]

got Venser

 

[TheMantyke]

Not really sure if this fits into subjective or objective changes, but there's are a few move legality issues in Gligar's GSC Analysis. From what I understand, Gligar can only obtain Earthquake through a special event in Pokemon Stadium 2. This makes Counter and Wing Attack incompatible with Earthquake. Both sets use the combination of Wing Attack + Earthquake so both sets need to have a slash replacement for either move.

 

[(makeup)]

If I recall correctly, that goes in this thread.

 

[TheMantyke]

If I recall correctly, that goes in this thread.

Albeit there is an error in the move database and Earthquake isn't listed under Gligar's learnt moves, I'm not exactly sure if I'm getting my point across. What I'm trying to point out is that all the sets listed in Gligar's GSC Analysis have illegal movesets and that the movesets need to be reworked with a few slashed moves.

 

[hamiltonion]

Albeit there is an error in the move database and Earthquake isn't listed under Gligar's learnt moves, I'm not exactly sure if I'm getting my point across. What I'm trying to point out is that all the sets listed in Gligar's GSC Analysis have illegal movesets and that the movesets need to be reworked with a few slashed moves.

I'm sure Charmander gets what you're saying but the changes you mentioned are of the subjective nature so they should go to the subjective changes thread. Also the move database can only be accessed by certains admins like Doug, Colin and Chaos.

 

[(makeup)]

Well, TheMantyke, I see what you mean, and I am pointing out that you should post that in the database errors thread because it is a database error. Like barry said, only admins can change the database, so it's probably best to PM one directly. The GSC Gligar analysis needs to be updated as well, yes, but you can't just ask someone to do that. Like all updates, it needs to go through QC, GP, and needs to be uploaded. If you want to do it, feel free, but I don't really think it's appropriate to ask people to do extra work, especially since that page is kind of ancient and obviously no one uses it since you're the first one who pointed it out.

And I don't think we should eat up any more of this thread on this argument since it's being archived, btw.

 

[NatGeo]

Hippopotas is notable only for the ability Sandstream

Should be Sand Stream.