Social LGBTQIA+

[Frailty]

Labels are fine they exist and more are normalised for a productive reason. Not many people knew what pan was in the 90s but now most people know what pan is. That's only because of people calling themself pan and it's made it easier for pan people to live / "explain themselves", as well as making it easier for people still discovering their sexuality, while not perfect they can give a person a broad idea to go off.

I feel like most disdain for neo/xeno pronouns comes from the notion that people will get offended and snap at you if you're unaware / forget their pronouns. That kind of idea is pushed by people who make memes about blue hair liberals and isn't true at all. Just ask and be respectful, it gets kind of hard to remember sometimes but its not really a big deal and people are understanding and would be happy to remind you things if they use less common pronouns; they don't expect everyone to remember / inherently know.

 

[Nightbloom]

I feel like most disdain for neo/xeno pronouns comes from the notion that people will get offended and snap at you if you're unaware / forget their pronouns. That kind of idea is pushed by people who make memes about blue hair liberals and isn't true at all. Just ask and be respectful, it gets kind of hard to remember sometimes but its not really a big deal and people are understanding and would be happy to remind you things if they use less common pronouns; they don't expect everyone to remember / inherently know.

yeah this is my experience as well with knowing quite a few people that identify as such. no one will actively get angry if its an honest mistake or someone just doesn't know. the "haha liberals mad because i referred to them incorrectly" is just complete nonsense and over exaggerated caricatures meant to dehumanize others. as you say, its easy to be respectful to others and at the end of the day, its not that hard to refer to people as they want to be referred to.

 

[vishy fishy]

I mean liberal doesn’t even mean democrat it includes democrats and republicans. So when you call a republican she bc they have no pronouns in bio and they start complaining about the world today just call them a liberal or something

 

[Style_Dota]

Small update: had FFS. Second gender affirming surgery done

 

[pz]

congratulations

Small update: had FFS. Second gender affirming surgery done

 

[Frailty]

I did probably one of the most down bad things I've ever done. I was watching a play and at intermission I wanted to go get food and then I saw this cute guy working the concession stand and thats the story of how I spent 16 bucks on a slushy. He complimented how I looked in my jumper though :)

Every time i use smogon i click the shortcut on my google home page and it comes to this particular post for some reason

 

[grovylestand]

1. i think labels can be defined to some extent for example i dont think it is right for someone to say they are trans when they arent meeting the typical descriptions i think thats same with sexuality but not at all true with gender terms.
2. can someone test she/they? (currently trans femme she/her)

 

[Ren]

I've been doing a lot of thinking and I feel like we should turn this thread into a WLM/MLW and masc men pride thread. Studies show that 0.01% of Smogonites identify as one of those labels, but they don't have a safe place to go. I know we're normally opposed to inclusiveness, but I think giving them a space on the internet where they can authentically be themselves would be beneficial for the community. I'm also thinking we should talk about a term for WLM/MLW...

I know this is a radical idea for a space that's typically always been very conservative, but I truly believe that this is the way to move forward.

(I didn't include femme women because all women should always be celebrated #idc)

 

[Frailty]

Gay





… April fool

 

[Big Druppee]

I love being gay

 

[Cryoam]

lil plug but I do free personal training on the side for lgbt ppl in order to provide gender affirming workout plans, as well as a safe space to talk about fitness that isn’t generic gym bro culture stuff

 

[RodentTamer]

Came out as Bi to my family today after 8 years of hiding it. Mom and Dad were very accepting, yet some of my relatives weren’t. A bit sad ngl but i saw this coming a MILE away

 

[cleopatra]

1. i think labels can be defined to some extent for example i dont think it is right for someone to say they are trans when they arent meeting the typical descriptions i think thats same with sexuality but not at all true with gender terms.
2. can someone test she/they? (currently trans femme she/her)

well what would be the "typical description" of a trans person
idk i am one i havent like. transitioned yet, yet i'd still consider myself trans

 

[RodentTamer]

Came out as Bi to my family today after 8 years of hiding it. Mom and Dad were very accepting, yet some of my relatives weren’t. A bit sad ngl but i saw this coming a MILE away

Small update, relatives won’t speak to me now, other than my aunt and uncle and now that this is actually happening, it’s REALLY dividing my family apart. I kind of regret coming out knowing that I caused this shit to happen, but like, it’s my sexuality so why do others care about it that much that you have to cause the entire family problems, my parents have been like very supportive saying they’ll always love me no matter what, but being called a sin and a demon constantly by relatives is just, saddening, like damn, i’m causing way more problems than here in this community.

edit: Holy yap, I didn’t didn’t think i’d actually write that much, but yeah, shit is very hectic right now.

 

[RodentTamer]

Small update, relatives won’t speak to me now, other than my aunt and uncle and now that this is actually happening, it’s REALLY dividing my family apart. I kind of regret coming out knowing that I caused this shit to happen, but like, it’s my sexuality so why do others care about it that much that you have to cause the entire family problems, my parents have been like very supportive saying they’ll always love me no matter what, but being called a sin and a demon constantly by relatives is just, saddening, like damn, i’m causing way more problems than here in this community.

edit: Holy yap, I didn’t didn’t think i’d actually write that much, but yeah, shit is very hectic right now.

Ok so now it actually led to a pretty bad fight, and me and my parents and grandparents being pretty much ostracized. So i’m feeling very guilty now. All of this started just from me coming out. How do I even, comprehend the fact that my family is torn now solely because i like men and women. I’m like so mad right now.

 

[Ren]

your family's torn apart because you have people who are supportive of others being themselves getting backlash from people who only support others when those others fit into an incredibly narrow box that keeps these close minded people comfortable. your family is not torn apart because youre queer. you're not the first queer person in your family tree, and you may not be the last - id feel fairly confident saying you arent even the only living queer person in your extended family tree. sooner or later, this would've happened - or it wouldn't have, and all of these queer people would've lived inauthentic lives and felt like they had to hide who they are.

because of you, coming out is 100x easier for them because they don't have the pressure of being the first to do it anymore. and they still might not come out! but if they don't, then they have the comfort of knowing they're not the only queer person in their extended family. people in your extended family who figure it out later will know theres someone who shares a similar experience. also regardless of all of this, you deserve to live true to yourself.

you did an incredibly brave thing and some people's inability to accept new things into their worldview doesn't take away from that - especially when it's uncle bernard who you only talk to when he inevitably ruins christmas dinner. be proud of yourself. words don't fix everything and don't feel bad for having complicated emotions, but when they arise do remember what ive said here. we got you!

 

[RodentTamer]

your family's torn apart because you have people who are supportive of others being themselves getting backlash from people who only support others when those others fit into an incredibly narrow box that keeps these close minded people comfortable. your family is not torn apart because youre queer. you're not the first queer person in your family tree, and you may not be the last - id feel fairly confident saying you arent even the only living queer person in your extended family tree. sooner or later, this would've happened - or it wouldn't have, and all of these queer people would've lived inauthentic lives and felt like they had to hide who they are.

because of you, coming out is 100x easier for them because they don't have the pressure of being the first to do it anymore. and they still might not come out! but if they don't, then they have the comfort of knowing they're not the only queer person in their extended family. people in your extended family who figure it out later will know theres someone who shares a similar experience. also regardless of all of this, you deserve to live true to yourself.

you did an incredibly brave thing and some people's inability to accept new things into their worldview doesn't take away from that - especially when it's uncle bernard who you only talk to when he inevitably ruins christmas dinner. be proud of yourself. words don't fix everything and don't feel bad for having complicated emotions, but when they arise do remember what ive said here. we got you!

Thank you. this actually means a lot. Especially since my whole day was pretty much shitty and filled with homophobic slurs and insults.

 

[bdt2002]

I don’t know who in this thread needs to hear this or if it’s even relevant to anyone’s discussions at the moment, but I just thought I’d let you know that it’s come to my attention that Pokémon Champions has introduced the first ever female Gallade in the entire Pokémon catalog. The public seems to be torn on whether or not this is a glitch or an error but I can already see the outcry should they decide to patch this. Me personally? I hope they keep this in. Strictly speaking, this causes virtually no harm to keep in the game and her removal would only cause problems that don’t need to be created.

 

[RodentTamer]

I don’t know who in this thread needs to hear this or if it’s even relevant to anyone’s discussions at the moment, but I just thought I’d let you know that it’s come to my attention that Pokémon Champions has introduced the first ever female Gallade in the entire Pokémon catalog. The public seems to be torn on whether or not this is a glitch or an error but I can already see the outcry should they decide to patch this. Me personally? I hope they keep this in. Strictly speaking, this causes virtually no harm to keep in the game and her removal would only cause problems that don’t need to be created.

that’s amazing! Female Gallade should stay since we have male and female Gardevoir

 

[bdt2002]

that’s amazing! Female Gallade should stay since we have male and female Gardevoir

I will admit it makes me wonder if anyone will end up finding a male Froslass in this game, seeing as it’s the other Dawn Stone evolution of a Gen 3 Pokémon. Should a male Froslass be discovered at any point, I feel like that would make it far more likely this was intentional. The game did just release in the past 24 hours, so I say we give it time and let the people explore the Trainer data for this game. It seems pretty lucky this Gallade was discovered as early as she was, I feel like something like that would normally take a few days to find.

 

[RodentTamer]

I will admit it makes me wonder if anyone will end up finding a male Froslass in this game, seeing as it’s the other Dawn Stone evolution of a Gen 3 Pokémon. Should a male Froslass be discovered at any point, I feel like that would make it far more likely this was intentional. The game did just release in the past 24 hours, so I say we give it time and let the people explore the Trainer data for this game. It seems pretty lucky this Gallade was discovered as early as she was, I feel like something like that would normally take a few days to find.

Wouldnt it be called Froslad though?

 

[bdt2002]

Wouldnt it be called Froslad though?

I propose we also go with Gallady while we’re at it

 

[cleopatra]

that’s amazing! Female Gallade should stay since we have male and female Gardevoir

i think they said they were gonna remove it and then decided to keep it
I really hope they do double down, since theres like no reason to change it still

 

[skype]

It’s lonely.

Sometimes I feel out of place in spaces that are supposed to be inclusive. Sometimes I feel out of place in certain lgbtq spaces because what I want doesn’t always seem to match what people expect. Sometimes I feel like being nice gets misread as being available. Sometimes I feel like having boundaries makes me seem cold, judgmental, or difficult, even when I’m really just trying to protect my peace.

It’s like people are fine with lgbtq in theory, but the second it comes up naturally, they get awkward and make that awkwardness your problem, you can make a single offhanded comment about an ex, or about something from your own life, and then the casual homophobia starts and you better laugh it off, reassure them, or pretend it didn’t feel weird otherwise you are being way too sensitive.

Our dating scenes suck too, obviously thats not the case for everyone and I know some people thrive in them, and I’m happy for them! But for me atleast, it can feel exhausting trying to find something genuine when so much feels casual, performative, overly sexualized, or just emotionally unavailable.

 

[Nightbloom]

It’s lonely.

Sometimes I feel out of place in spaces that are supposed to be inclusive. Sometimes I feel out of place in certain lgbtq spaces because what I want doesn’t always seem to match what people expect. Sometimes I feel like being nice gets misread as being available. Sometimes I feel like having boundaries makes me seem cold, judgmental, or difficult, even when I’m really just trying to protect my peace.

It’s like people are fine with lgbtq in theory, but the second it comes up naturally, they get awkward and make that awkwardness your problem, you can make a single offhanded comment about an ex, or about something from your own life, and then the casual homophobia starts and you better laugh it off, reassure them, or pretend it didn’t feel weird otherwise you are being way too sensitive.

Our dating scenes suck too, obviously thats not the case for everyone and I know some people thrive in them, and I’m happy for them! But for me atleast, it can feel exhausting trying to find something genuine when so much feels casual, performative, overly sexualized, or just emotionally unavailable.

thats a mood and a half. its really unfortunate, because having boundaries is normal and doesnt make someone difficult or cold. sometimes people just push their own expectations onto others, and end up disappointed when those expectations arent the same as what someone actually wants. i can completely understand how utterly exhausting that can be.