Hilarious NPC Quotes

Ransei

Garde Mystik
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"My Pokemon won't evolve. Why?"
*sends out a level 33 Machoke*

after beating him

"Maybe some Pokémon need element stones to evolve."


Edit: Another trainer, after beating them
"Did you know moves like Earthquake don't have any effect on birds?"

Me: "bruh I literally just beat you with Rhyhorn spamming Rock Slide. It had Earthquake. I think it's obvious why I never used it..."
 
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"You defeated me and the pokemon who do my work..." - Office Worker Gabrielle. Right after she decided to re-evaluate her work productivity and contributions to the world.

Me walking away form the battle

 

Ransei

Garde Mystik
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"I can beat you when it comes to knowledge about POKéMON!"

Hi, sir... Did you know there's a Moltres literally nine steps away from where you're standing right now? It's just nine steps... You can catch it you know. No? You're not gonna catch it? Ok...


Edit:

"Well he's wrong, Pokemon are for fighting"

Am I allowed to think you've taken this whole fighting thing too far? YOU HAVE AN ENTIRE CEMETERY IN YOUR ROOM!

Edit 2:

"RANSEI! So, you won! Congratulations! You're the new Pokémon League champion! You've grown up so much since you first left with CHARMANDER! RANSEI, you have come of age! SINNOH! I'm disappointed!"

LOL
 
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Ransei

Garde Mystik
is a Forum Moderatoris a Community Contributoris a Battle Simulator Moderatoris a Battle Simulator Admin Alumnusis a Community Leader Alumnus
"Hi, GARDEM You never cease to amaze me! Thanks to you, my research is going great! Take this as a token of my appreciation. The Master Ball is the best! It’s the ultimate Poké Ball! It’ll catch any Pokémon without fail. It’s given only to noted Pokémon researchers. I think you can make much better use of it than I can, GARDEM! "

I just tossed it out into the Lake of Rage then saved the game afterwards.
 
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Pikachu315111

Ranting & Raving!
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Not a hilarious NPC moment, but still a funny image:

*The person who made this image admitted that disregarded Cinderace's Court Change cause they didn't know what it did at the time. Though no one then pointed out to them that Emboar's in the same boat as Delphox where its Signature Move is now learnable by many via a technical machine. Honestly it's more like this:

Charizard: 2 Megas, 1 Gigantamax, 2 Gen Remakes
Blaziken: 1 Mega, 1 Gen Remake
Incineroar: 1 Z-Move
Cinderace: 2 Signature Moves
Emboar & Delphox: Formerly had Signature Moves
Typhlosion: 1 Gen Remake
Infernape: "What you guys talkin' about?"
 
Not a hilarious NPC moment, but still a funny image:

*The person who made this image admitted that disregarded Cinderace's Court Change cause they didn't know what it did at the time. Though no one then pointed out to them that Emboar's in the same boat as Delphox where its Signature Move is now learnable by many via a technical machine. Honestly it's more like this:

Charizard: 2 Megas, 1 Gigantamax, 2 Gen Remakes
Blaziken: 1 Mega, 1 Gen Remake
Incineroar: 1 Z-Move
Cinderace: 2 Signature Moves
Emboar & Delphox: Formerly had Signature Moves
Typhlosion: 1 Gen Remake
Infernape: "What you guys talkin' about?"
Part of the humor comes from Infernape not needing any of that stuff to be a great Pokemon.
 

Pikachu315111

Ranting & Raving!
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Part of the humor comes from Infernape not needing any of that stuff to be a great Pokemon.
True, Infernape may not have anything special to it (though sure Sinnoh remakes are coming so we'll see) but of the Fire/Fighting Fire Starters it did the job the best. That said, when the Sinnoh remakes come, I wouldn't argue them maybe giving it (and the other Sinnoh Starters) something special, like how about a Signature Move that's a Fire-type version of Close Combat (call it "Fists of Fiery" and make it a punching move). ;)

Eh, that joke's been overused it really needs a punch to get a good chuckle from it. Family members have been done to death so...

(NOTE: Keeping in mind that in Gen VI we get 12 letters to work with)

dignity
wallet
National Dex
shitty waifu
 

Max. Optimizer

free to be the greatest
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I made a post in this thread almost 4 years ago about how the little Fairy Tale Girls had some really bizarre trainer quotes (especially in the battle facilities) and it looks like this trend is continuing now with the new Poké Kid trainer class (the kids dressed up as Pikachu and Eevee) in Pokémon Sword & Shield.

In the Battle Tower, there is for example this Poké Kid dressed up as Eevee that describes the "risqué" family situation at home.

Edit: I have not seen these myself in my own game after 500+ battles, so there's a possibility that they might be fake. (Source)

"Kneel down before me! My mum always says that to my dad."



"Mum has this special sugar, she says is not for tea but I put it in my tea anyway."

 
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Pikachu315111

Ranting & Raving!
is a Community Contributoris a Top Smogon Media Contributor
"Kneel down before me! My mum always says that to my dad."
"She's dressed as a super hero while my dad I guess is playing someone she just saved from a burning building cause he's only wearing his underwear and he has a black ball in his mouth, like charcoal or sumthin."
Me: I think your parents need to learn to close the bedroom door.
"Oh they do, it's when they have the villain fight cause there's a lot of yelling and fighting phrases like "you're a dirty, pathetic man" and "hurt me more".

"Mum has this special sugar, she says is not for tea but I put it in my tea anyway."
*Starts to twitch erratically* "I took some before coming here for good luck!"
Me: You're foaming at the mouth
"Thath jutht meanths iths thworking"

Sadly couldn't find someplace where all the quotes are, if I want to see any probably would have to watch through some Battle Tower videos on Youtube.

*Watches some vidoes*

Sadly the ones I watched didn't have any of the girl Poke Kids, but I found a few "funny" ones:

Female Officer Worker Sayla:
Intro:
I take all the stress I've built up in my workplace and blast it all away with a good battle!
Defeat: Great, now I'm stressed out about losing on top of being stressed out about work!
Me: #Torealforme

Schoolboy Albie:
Intro:
Do your best in this battle! 'Cause I'm live streaming it all, see.
Losing: M-my followers won't let you get away with this.
Me: Oh, great, just what I need, threats of being doxxed and swatted in Pokemon as well as real life.
 

Jerry the great

Banned deucer.
Man, I always loved this quote. Especially considering what comes before it.
Starly used pluck!
Mars: What do you think you're doing to my Pokemon?!
Me: Uhh girl, you told me directly to fight you, and now you're complaining about me attacking? What? Do you want me to battle you or not?!
 

Yung Dramps

awesome gaming
We all know how much GF loves innuendo, so here's a lesser known instance from ORAS!

In Sea Mauville, one of the locked rooms (Room 2) has two girls talking to each other on the inside. Upon talking to them, one of them goes (and this isn't the precise quote but w/e):

"How did you get in here? Here, take this and leave us alone!"

hands you key to Room 6

"
I'm teaching this girl how hard it is to be a Pokemon trainer!"

When you talk to the second girl, she simply goes "Blush". No, really, that's what her textbox says.

Hmm...
 
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breh

強いだね
The extent to which it's questionable is more subdued in Japanese, but it's still pretty lesbiany lol
 
We all know how much GF loves innuendo, so here's a lesser known instance from ORAS!

In Sea Mauville, one of the locked rooms (Room 1) has two girls talking to each other on the inside. Upon talking to them, one of them goes (and this isn't the precise quote but w/e):

"How did you get in here? Here, take this and leave us alone!"

hands you key to Room 2

"
I'm teaching this girl how hard it is to be a Pokemon trainer!"

When you talk to the second girl, she simply goes "Blush". No, really, that's what her textbox says.

Hmm...
They wouldn't happen to be Mysterious Sisters Scall & Ion, would they?

Either little sis is just embarrassed about her need of training being loudly announced and we just have our heads in the gutters, or this is a major yikes.

In any case, Sea Mauville is a pretty spooky place, as is its RSE counterpart to a lesser extent. It makes some sense for a Hex Maniac and her Fairy Tale Girl sister to be chilling there, though that doesn't explain Young Couple Lois & Hal (Kira & Dan in Emerald).

Unless...
 

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