Lifestyle The Mental Wellness Thread

random question for people that either came out the doldrums and/or has their highs and lows (like me).

yall ever have like.... emotions just because YOU'RE NOT UNHAPPY anymore? (especially when it is a decent to good day) --- like not even a bad emotion, it's almost like you're just happy you're not sad anymore you get a lil sappy about it?

been happening a bit recently and i'm like "Jeez I'll take it but can this make sense to me why it's so random? Rather be sappy to be happy than emo to be down low but sheesh... why my emotions gotta make me sappy even when happy?" lmao
 
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roxie

https://www.youtube.com/@noxiousroxie
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Every single fucking day has been the same exact thing, I wake up and do nothing productive for the rest of the day, and then go to bed so I can wake up on the next day and repeat the same exact thing.
It's all the same, it never ends, I am stuck on the same day for the rest of my life, and no amount of motivation can help me get through this shit.
It's gotten to the point where i rather stay in my bed and just fantasize about impossible scenarios, fantasizing about my ideal life.
I just don't want to ever wake up again, nothing in this life will ever outdo any of my fantasies
I've felt this way before. Part of this has simply just been because of interactions in conjunction with my own personal difficulties like anxiety and depression. What I am saying is meeting people and the direct result is pretty much negative makes it more intimidating to actually hold conversations (while also being an overthinker.. lol). Lately I've been trying to figure out ways to cope these issues (personally) & practicing social interactions such as smoking (and finding other people to smoke with), making youtube videos, and even logging on here to play tours / prep to not be in that gloomy stage for so long? We are also paired for NU seasonals and my discord is noxiousroxie if you still want to play. (i extended our match). and if you need to talk to im here on disicord and I dont think you or anyone should end your life <3 i have been in some really rough places but ik there is better to come (and even if it doesnt feel like it, i at least have ways to paint happiness in my life if that makes sense.
 

bdt2002

Pokémon Ranger: Guardian Signs superfan
is a Pre-Contributor
I want to talk for a moment about therapy. Not on my own behalf, but for the sake of anyone going through difficult times. We’re often told that therapy can be helpful to anyone, but there’s a lot that can happen in a counseling setting that contributes to our perceived ability to feel emotions. It’s easy for me to say this, but I think the word “trauma” gets thrown around a lot more than it should be, to the point where it may start to become an active detriment to people with traumatic memories. It’s because of those that certain individuals may be safaris of seeking counseling entirely, but any therapist worth their salt is going to want to help you explain your thoughts in a way that’s easy to understand.

Reading over some of the posts sent here recently, I think it may be a benefit to do some research on a lesser-known term known as anhedonia and consider reaching out to a licensed counselor or therapist about the topic if at all possible. Anhedonia is best described as a neurological disorder characterized by the lack of ability to understand and perceive positive emotions such as happiness, love, and self-worth. I actually discuss this with my own counselor, so I can attest to the idea that anhedonia develops when the brain stops receiving proper stimulation and the vitamins that encourage emotional development. Once you’ve found a therapeutic setting that works for you, you can discuss with your counselor specific strategies to procedurally improve your mental wellness.
 

Theia

I danced for you for the last time
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Wow imagine a happy positive Theia update post for once

The new semester started this week and I am...doing okay. This is my last full semester (I need about six more credits to graduate after this thanks to the university fucking me over) and I'm taking six classes right now. Most of them are just to fulfill my Upper Level Electives requirement (excepting Human Genetics for non-majors, since the school requires that everyone take science credits), which means I got to pick out some really cool classes that I'm excited about taking, like Data Science, Data Analytics for Cybersecurity, and Markup and Scripting Languages. The workload is pretty intense, I can't lie, and I can tell I'll have a lot less time for Smogon this semester, as I'm already spending 12-14 hour days on campus doing work, but that's okay. Looking to the future is a little stressful since graduation is so near, but I'm hopeful I can find a decent job somewhere.

I have taken up going to the gym, with mixed results. Going to Pilates with 30 other girls who are all pretty and athletic is a little daunting, especially when I can't do things as easily as they can. On the other hand, kickboxing has turned out to be a lot of fun, and I even (accidentally) made friends with some girls at kickboxing who recognized me from Pilates the night before.

Hand in hand with that, I mentioned that I've been struggling with eating issues and depression in my last post. After like a year of trying, my therapist and I finally have found a good combination of meds that seems to work for me. While I'm not "normal" yet, I have been eating with more regularity as of late. I've taken up meal prepping again, a habit I ended up abandoning during a particularly low point, so I bring lunch with me to campus and almost always eat at least once per day, which is a pretty drastic improvement.

As great as meds are, I really owe most of my improvement to the people I've been surrounding myself with lately. Back in September, I created a server for people to help out with tournament coverage articles and it kind of sort of accidentally also became a friend server. It's been a really great thing for me after sort of drifting in and out of friend groups for a while, to just create my own and invite people I enjoy spending time with. Some people joined just for aforementioned article writing and ended up staying and becoming friends too, which has been wonderful. Everyone there is so supportive not just of me, but of each other, and it's a very positive environment where we do normal friend things like weekly movie nights and it's nice to have a group of friends outside of people I staff with, where a lot of our interactions are colored by some bullshit or another happening on the site. I have friends share cooking and cat pictures with, friends to teambuild with, friends to just chat about dumb shit with, and I know that sounds very simple to a lot of people but it's a huge thing for me. It's helped me shift my mindset a lot away from being so hyperfocused on what other people think of me and instead just enjoy being here with people I like being around and do the things I want to do.

Of course, things are far from perfect and I am far from better. I've been this way for a long time and there's a lot of damage to undo. There will certainly be low points and setbacks and falling back into old bad habits, because that's just how it works. But for the first time in a long time, things are starting to look up and getting better is starting to look possible.
 

Eledyr

Le vilain petit Wooloo
is a Site Content Manageris a Top Social Media Contributoris a Community Leaderis a Community Contributoris a Tiering Contributoris a Top Contributoris a Smogon Media Contributoris a Dedicated Tournament Host
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Now is time for my 0.02$ post.

I've been struggling with mental illnesses for the last 4 years. I've been taking meds for about 3 years now, combined with therapy. Like many, I'm struggling with depression, but also with psychotic disorder.

But. BUT.

I'm here to say for anyone who would be struggling with mental illnesses that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. We are many. We also struggle. Yes it's rough. Yes giving up is probably the easiest way. But I can guarantee that this is not the way to go. The thing that allow me to not give up are my friends and family. Even when everything goes black, when I'm desperate, I keep hope. I know there are people that love me for what I am, that will support me despite whatever shit I'll go through. I am not alone.

Neither you are. Don't believe in your worst thoughts.

You are not alone. :psyglad:
 
I was playing basketball in the hood and i unfortunatelly torn my ACL which would suck on its own means i cant work considering my kine of work nowadays is mostly manual and would be dangerous for me to do.

i cant cope with such an injury, i just spent like a month worth of money in a 2 days gambling streak and needed to beg my old school friends for rent considering after said gambling streak i cant barely eat and i cant function.

i will literally need to sell alfajores in the side of my hood in Forte Apache, there is not even a day that i dont think about ending it all, why I need to be a useless weight to everybody? why injury myself when my life was relatively back on track? Will i be so poot that i wont be able to sustain myself? Will i ever find someone to start blessed family in the name of Allah? Allah is literally the only one giving me strenght to resist.

who would’ve throught surviving in a inflation plagued economy and giving my situation would mean having a meaningless and honestly unnapealing existence

i would beg for any emotional support cause i feel so lonely like I’ve been abanoded andi am so afraid of ended up in the streets begging for food and money when nobody has money here.
 
يرحمك الله

Praise be to Allah.

The Holy Qur’an speaks of the mountains and explains that Allah, may He be exalted, created them so as to make the earth stable and, so that it would not shake or move.

Allah, may He be exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And the earth We spread out, and placed therein firm mountains”

[al-Hijr 15:19]

“And We have placed on the earth firm mountains, lest it should shake with them”

[al-Anbiya’ 21:31]
 
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I Wish the world threat all of yall better than they have threated me, its a goodbye message for everyone in this site, I’m begging whoever moderates this to not delete this post and to not make my pain be forgotten,in the name of allah


يرحمك الله

Praise be to Allah.

The Holy Qur’an speaks of the mountains and explains that Allah, may He be exalted, created them so as to make the earth stable and, so that it would not shake or move.

Allah, may He be exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And the earth We spread out, and placed therein firm mountains”

[al-Hijr 15:19]

“And We have placed on the earth firm mountains, lest it should shake with them”

[al-Anbiya’ 21:31]
My friend, the Quran tells us that it is a grave sin to take your life, it is as if you are taking the life of another. “Calamities will continue to befall believing men and women in themselves, their children and their wealth, until they meet Allah with no burden of sin.” (Tirmidhi(c)). Please be safe, you will break this test.

i'm currently in the school counselor's office because i told my math teacher i was gonna kill myself
As someone who had his first attempt at 9, it's really hard hearing when I see kids at the age of my attempts going through it all. Please don't do it dude, I'm really glad you've sought help from your school and it's important that you keep in mind that these adults want to help you. You matter even if you might feel like it sometimes and you have to remember who you're important to when you get those thoughts.
 
Someone brought this thread to my attention so I want give my $0.02. Let's follow the rules in the OP and use content warnings. I understand life is difficult but not everyone entering this thread wants to or can read that you are planning to take your life, attempted to, or threatened to.

Secondly, let's start specifying what we're looking for. Are you simply venting and talking to the void? Do you want someone to reach out and talk to you? Many of these posts can be difficult to know how to respond to. If you're feeling that you're at the lowest, it's probably best not to post here. Nobody is going to see it fast enough and potentially save your life. Please do look up your countries suicide hotline in that case and call it.
 
Couple of days ago, I went down from 5mg to 2.5mg of Escitalopram, a SSRI. I've been taking these pills since about 4.5 years. They didn't really have much of an impact on my mood, but they did greatly stabilize my sleeping behavior, when it was completely fucked up by the point I started taking them

I have no idea why my withdrawal symptoms are so strong. I was told these symptoms are very rare, and that they only occur when there's a huge jump in dosage in a short amount of time. The symptoms I have now are weaker than the ones I had when I went down from 10mg to 5mg, but still, my hands are shaking, I feel nervous as if I were to talk to 50.000 people, my moods instable and my cortisol to melatonin ratio seems fucked.

I heard there are genetic factors to chemical dependance and I suppose they're quite strong in me. Most of my family and relatives are and have been heavily addicted to all kinds of drugs, from nicotine to ketamine. It's good I never smoked or drank, I don't want to imagine how alcohol withdrawal would feel with my inclinations
 

lighthouses

Inordinary
is a Tiering Contributor
tried a lot ever since the last time i felt compelled to post here, lots of ups and downs but honestly mostly downs, things just dont seem to meaningfully improve
im a bit past the point where i think im a danger to myself, lots of therapy have pretty much made me as functional as i can be but in a way i guess that just makes me a little sad, im never actually going to do it, ill stay, i always thought i should stay to just see what happens but things are never quite looking good for me
i hope a lot of the people i interacted and discussed mental health and life stuff with during my time on here are doing alright now, i think about all of you often
stay strong guys, its a never ending struggle but youre not alone, im sure it gets better
oh and also one very overlooked aspect of all of this is the fact that i expected to be dead by now honestly, meaning there hasnt been much long term planning ive done for my life which really bites now that i know ill live
 
tdlr: espprosso made me feed good once, try some and see if it helps ur depression
Hello 18-year-old-me from a decade ago, I don't know why you are purposely using bad grammar but it's not funny at all, try to punctuate stuff better. I wish you smoked more weed back then because I now get bad schizophrenic trips every time I try and hit the devil's lettuce.
You should have tried to get with girls from school more, young love is priceless.

But who knows?
Maybe it was better that it was never meant with some girls, we would drifted apart anyway, they would have ended up as another facebook/instagram profile I check from time to time and feeling mildly envious of.

All-in-all, 18year old me, I thank you for not fucking me over and carrying me over where I am!
 

bdt2002

Pokémon Ranger: Guardian Signs superfan
is a Pre-Contributor
This will the first post I've written on the Forums since the day of the Pokémon Presents this past week and the announcement of Pokémon Legends: Zygarde I am not calling it Z-A, that name might be dumbest thing I've ever heard and normally, I would be eager to post about what I'm stressed out about and why I have sometimes felt the need to erase my profile details, but it feels more beneficial and more positive to acknowledge how I can, quote, "start to feel better". Let's get the main thing that's been bothering me during my break from Smogon out of the way first- the 27th was just a really bad day overall. In the immediate moment, I was focused on a severe weather threat that was supposed to be in my area that day, and it was also the day before I was going to take a midterm exam. I won't cross-link my own posts or anything of the sort, but I'll admit that my initial reaction to the new Pokémon Legends game was a bit much, if only for the shock factor alone.

Slowly since then, however, I've been feeling a little better each day. We did eventually have some pretty bad weather go through my area the night before the midterm, but by this point I had stopped thinking about Pokémon entirely so that was nice. Thankfully nothing bad actually happened, and while I'm still waiting on a grade back for the exam- I'm fully expecting to have done terrible, for the record- I started to think that if this exam was the biggest thing I had to worry about, then my life seems to be pretty good overall. I haven't had anything to complain about since then, and while I'm still extremely mixed on whether or not I'll pick up this new Pokémon Legends game and any future Pokémon games after this, at this immediate point in time I am at least willing to stick around and see what other people think of it, since I do not want my own shock factor to ruin the experience for other players.

Edit: I would say that it's good to be back, but while I still believe that, I generally don't like to say anything that might make it seem like I'm begging for attention.
 

Denial

formerly Lunala
is a Past WCoP Champion
Been some months since ive been using this site, original plan was to never come back but here i am. Wont go as personal as i did in previous posts i did here (that i have long deleted). In those months ive been hanging out with different communities and gone to therapy sessions, and realized i still got a long way to be the best version i can be of myself. Probably the reason i came back in the first place, i don't want to leave my long story on this site with such negative energy. Obviously wont be able to fix everything but ill do what i can.

Uni is currently kicking my ass since its the last year and i have exams just this upcoming morning, i took a good sleep earlier today cause i knew id be too nervous to even close eyes tonight lmao. So wish me luck.

Mini life update i guess, i mark today as a "new beginning" as corny as that sounds but if we ever talked in the past and want to catch up or simply want to talk with me, hit me up here in pms and ill give you my discord account.
 
I'll try to keep it brief because I don't want to bother anyone too much with something as silly with this but I kind of want to get it off my chest.
I'm told I do a "good job" with whatever it might be, or that I do a lot, but like. Translating my work environment to a social environment kinda sucks. I've always been a worker. I've always been of the idea that I'm just a number, and I try to aim to be the biggest number I can be. I hate being told that people "worry about me" because I'm doing too much of something. I'd rather work so hard that I crash and burn than realize when to take a break.

And that's a problem. But the worrying part for me is, I recognize that it's a problem, but I never really try to fix it. Hell, I don't even know HOW to fix it. Any advice?
 

tondas

Life of the party
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It's been a losing battle. Living in a bipolar depressive state for 90% of my days is just not worth it. Writing here because I'm struggling with a lack of friends, no family to communicate with, and no end goals in sight, all anchored by a job I hate. My heart's in hell and the worst part is that I deserved it by the way I've pushed away all the people who've tried to help me. I see myself as someone who has hurt others and the only glimmer of humanity I have is the fact that the guilt is flooding my every thought. The financial divot of medications that take away my ability to feel is sinking me down alongside my ongoing medical debts. I'm not even remotely okay. I've cried out before for people to come to my side and I've only been met with silence. I realized too late what destructive path I took. Please pray for me. I'm sorry everyone
 

bdt2002

Pokémon Ranger: Guardian Signs superfan
is a Pre-Contributor
It's been a losing battle. Living in a bipolar depressive state for 90% of my days is just not worth it. Writing here because I'm struggling with a lack of friends, no family to communicate with, and no end goals in sight, all anchored by a job I hate. My heart's in hell and the worst part is that I deserved it by the way I've pushed away all the people who've tried to help me. I see myself as someone who has hurt others and the only glimmer of humanity I have is the fact that the guilt is flooding my every thought. The financial divot of medications that take away my ability to feel is sinking me down alongside my ongoing medical debts. I'm not even remotely okay. I've cried out before for people to come to my side and I've only been met with silence. I realized too late what destructive path I took. Please pray for me. I'm sorry everyone
If it helps anything, I feel like that remaining 10% still makes life worth living in the end. It's possible that you're feeling torn between two "sides" of yourself and more specifically your mental wellness. Should you wish to try this- who am I to assume what you might be going through behind the scenes, after all?- I would advise you to reach out to a licensed therapy or counseling group, or even just a bipolar depression specialist. The fact that you seem to be able to recognize there may be problems going on is the first step, and you've made it this far. The stage has been set, and now it's up to you to find out what you want the rest of your so-called "performance" (your life) to look like to yourself and to your so-called "audience". You've got this :D
 

Havens

WGI World Champion
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Hi lads. As of a few days ago, my doctor has told me that I'm neuro-divergent in some form; I'll find out to what extent in a few days, but for now I don't know how to feel. It's good to know I have an answer for why I do some of the things I do and I don't feel any different from the person I naturally am; I'm not sure how to react to this information, if I should be at all.

What should I consider going forward?
 

bdt2002

Pokémon Ranger: Guardian Signs superfan
is a Pre-Contributor
Hi lads. As of a few days ago, my doctor has told me that I'm neuro-divergent in some form; I'll find out to what extent in a few days, but for now I don't know how to feel. It's good to know I have an answer for why I do some of the things I do and I don't feel any different from the person I naturally am; I'm not sure how to react to this information, if I should be at all.

What should I consider going forward?
Boy, do I have thread for you :quagchamppogsire:

Okay, but in all seriousness, I feel like all of us are neurodiverse to some extent. In the modern context, I'm not even sure I would actually consider myself autistic (more specifically, "on the spectrum") anymore, but that doesn't change the fact that all of us do and say things differently and for our own reasons. I might not understand other people's reasons, but I can certainly try to respect them. In other words, try and consider this news- very vague news in my honest opinion, but still news- just like any other part of your personality and nature you respect about yourself. Speaking from experience, issues with my mental wellness have largely come from when I start to slip up and consider my neurodiversity to be an active detriment in the same vein as, say, a lethal disease for instance.
 
It's been a losing battle. Living in a bipolar depressive state for 90% of my days is just not worth it. Writing here because I'm struggling with a lack of friends, no family to communicate with, and no end goals in sight, all anchored by a job I hate. My heart's in hell and the worst part is that I deserved it by the way I've pushed away all the people who've tried to help me. I see myself as someone who has hurt others and the only glimmer of humanity I have is the fact that the guilt is flooding my every thought. The financial divot of medications that take away my ability to feel is sinking me down alongside my ongoing medical debts. I'm not even remotely okay. I've cried out before for people to come to my side and I've only been met with silence. I realized too late what destructive path I took. Please pray for me. I'm sorry everyone
bipolar gang, spent three or four years in a similar state that just kept spiraling, and there's not a thing you're saying here that I didn't go through.

you might not get anything out of this because I know that I ignored a lot of advice during that time, but maybe you're ready to hear this stuff. I started by accepting that things might never get better, that if I was ever going to be happy, I needed to find a way to do it with what little I had in life. otherwise, what was the point in going on and continuing to suffer?

I had to live within my meager financial means (on top of low income, I'd also built up what was relative to my income a significant amount of debt) and be happy with what I had rather than be envious or angry about all the things I didn't have. my general attitude that life was unfair wasn't serving me in life; it didn't really matter whether it was true because it didn't change the reality of my situation. I pushed away my family and friends because I was so ashamed of myself, of how I'd treated my depression with drinking and smoking and overeating, which I also realized was an active detriment to my happiness. once I decided that I needed to quit behaving in ways that exacerbated my problems, I started on an upward trajectory that continued to build momentum until I reached a level of health and happiness that I hadn't experienced since I was a kid.

once you tear down everything that has backed you into this corner, you can start to rebuild, but you have to take things step by step starting with your relationship with yourself. you have to forgive yourself for the mistakes you've made, understand that you've been navigating life with a small fraction of the energy that it takes just to live a normal life, and accept that it takes a lot of small wins to reach the bigger ones. therapy and medication are great tools, but it's ultimately up to you to take action in your own life.

all the best to you
 

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